Seight Posted February 23, 2022 Share Posted February 23, 2022 "I live near the worst of the three Dollars Generals" -Me, looking for garbage bags and finding Ziploc sandwich bags and NOPE THAT'S FUCKING ALL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted February 23, 2022 Share Posted February 23, 2022 (edited) Sunday: Me: "So will the winter storm possibly be going over this part of the state?" Monday: Tuesday: Tuesday Night: LITERALLY THIS MORNING: Meteorologists: "oh lol sorry, didn't hear you, yeah you might get half an inch to an inch of ice" Edited February 23, 2022 by Seight 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katt_goddess Posted February 24, 2022 Share Posted February 24, 2022 First off, screw you packaged 'quick' food that can't be microwaved without exploding. I don't want to use the oven for 10 minutes for cheesie sticks, I want to nuke them sonsofbitches and eat them. Secondly, what is this 'refrigerate unused portions immediately' crap? There's like 6 mottza sticks in there, my littlest niecelette could eat those and still want a bowl of ice cream the size of her head. It was a box of long-suffering delicious lies and now I have the urps. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted February 25, 2022 Share Posted February 25, 2022 So this lady has been asking for snacks and water during treatment ... which we dont do btw So in her dissatisfaction with our service she has decided she's going to scream for 4 hours. ..... uhm no the fuck you are not going to scream at us for 4 hours. You can calm the fuck down or I can call your transportation to pick you up. You are literally screaming like somebody is stabbing you in the chest. The people from the restaurant next door are about to call 911. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discolé monade Posted February 25, 2022 Share Posted February 25, 2022 high anxiety attack today. fuck you anxiety. and fuck the people that triggered it. 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted February 25, 2022 Share Posted February 25, 2022 For the past 11 hours vladimir putin’s beady little eyes keep making me forget wtf I even went to search for 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted February 25, 2022 Share Posted February 25, 2022 So I'm taking my kid to get his haircut in the kid salon. So they have this play area with like a train set or whatever so he goes over to play and I sit on the couch behind him. I notice this old white bitch keeps looking at me funny and I'm like .... oh okay bitch whatever. Then her grandkid comes over to play with my kid. No problem, kids are kids so he's talking to me, I talk back, he leaves. The kid comes back with a toy you have to pay for and he puts on the table by my kid. My kid is like uhhh but he keeps playing, not touching the toy. The old bitch sees it and tells him go get it and put it back. Still no problem, I'm just sitting there by the table and the toy. She could just come get it but she's looking at me and the toy like I'll explode if she comes near. She's begging and pleading with the kid. The kid is doing his own thing. Finally the kid's mom (her daughter I assume) finishes whatever she's doing and she points at the toy and her daughter is like ... wth just go get it. No dice. Anyway the daughter gets the toy and puts it away I'm just like .... WHY YOU SCARED??! I guess Imma just rob you in this salon full of children and other whites??!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted February 26, 2022 Share Posted February 26, 2022 So tonight I learned that a bowl of Thai Fried Rice that is at 3/10 on the restaurant's heat scale is right at the level where if it was any hotter I would be like "fuck why did I do this to myself." For those of you that have ever asked yourselves "Is Seight just basic or what?" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted February 28, 2022 Share Posted February 28, 2022 (edited) So my stepdad has been out of the hospital I wanna say for a week ... maybe a week and a half. First he was too scared to eat anything really because of all the meds and the whole discussions about how your diet and non compliance with your meds got you into this mess in the first place. So surprise, surprise .... he decided oh I'm feeling a little better I can probably eat trash again. So my sister made a nice healthy old people dinner last night for him. He says I dont want that, I want all the sodium from a lasagna sampler at Fazzoli's or something. .... for some reason my mom goes to get it. Few hours later, his speech is slurred and he cant walk without assistance down the hallway. So I asked my sister wasnt he supposed to get a walker or a cane when he came home? He decided he didn't need one and declined it at the VA mhmm ... so they're back at the ER again. Now here's the part where I decided to make a joke at the wrong time .... so Imma just be quiet ... because clearly I'm retarded. So they're at the ER and my mom puts a message in the group chat asking my sister what does a code blue mean? ... Me: "In my extensive knowledge of Grey's anatomy, cardiac arrest or respiratory failure Bring the crash cart, charge the paddles to 200, push one of epi" My sister is like : .......why do you ask? My mom : they said they were putting your dad in room 201, they just called a code blue in 201 ..... so yeah ... Imma just be quiet ehhh .... I feel like if he coded they would've told my mom by now so ... whatever Nvm. It was him. Edited February 28, 2022 by Vamped 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chapinator_X Posted March 2, 2022 Share Posted March 2, 2022 The dev team is already hard pressed enough about implementing toolbar changes. Breathing down my neck to pester the devs just because I put the ticket in for you is not going to get any of this done any sooner. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 3, 2022 Share Posted March 3, 2022 Bruh .... Medicare deciding these old people dont need transportation is fucking me up. Now everybody needs transportation. I DONT HAVE ANY. I called this one provider last week that assured me we were fine and to check back this week. Checked back .... oh sorry ... looks like we lied ... you need to call Wellcare. Called Wellcare after a whole fucking hour of phone trees and dead end transfers and they're like .... who told you to call us??!! BITCH I HAVE EXPLAINED THIS SHIT 12 TIMES!!! Looks like they're not going to approve shit either. Called the patient ... ring to VM Giiiiirl you better answer this phone or you going to be shit out of luck with no warning 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kudasai Posted March 3, 2022 Share Posted March 3, 2022 People suck, that is all. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted March 7, 2022 Share Posted March 7, 2022 (edited) i hate the machines for making me imagine what a "vertical river" is. Nobody, ever, has used the term vertical fucking river until now shoulda just hit skip bc there is no such thing as a vertical river Edited March 7, 2022 by Poof FUCK NEVERMIND.... waterfalls are vertical rivers. fuck. still theres no waterfalls.... 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted March 8, 2022 Share Posted March 8, 2022 i bought a new mouse bc the other one was broken only it wasn't broken it just needed new batteries but im dumb so I didnt think to check the batteries until after the new one got here 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 8, 2022 Share Posted March 8, 2022 I was already in a bad mood this morning. I think I'm just emotionally drained with everything going on and then I just spilled my whole little container of coffee all over my desk. Luckily my laptop didn't take too much liquid and still works but my knees are wet I'm just standing behind my desk with a river of coffee and one of the doctor's pops in to ask me a question and I'm just like ..... You betcha .... I'll get right on that !! 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mthor Posted March 10, 2022 Author Share Posted March 10, 2022 Fuck common core math. 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 *places fist between two pieces of bread* I made lunch for the CEO of The One Gas Station By The Airport Being Aware That They Are The One Gas Station By The Airport 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 (edited) 4 hours ago, Seight said: *places fist between two pieces of bread* I made lunch for the CEO of The One Gas Station By The Airport Being Aware That They Are The One Gas Station By The Airport i wish the airplane people would just let them put The One Gas Station By The Airport alil closer so I could walk to it from the airport Edited March 11, 2022 by Poof 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 On 3/7/2022 at 9:18 PM, Poof said: i bought a new mouse bc the other one was broken only it wasn't broken it just needed new batteries but im dumb so I didnt think to check the batteries until after the new one got here this new mouse is advertised as a quiet mouse but it's only 2/3s quiet. The left and right buttons are whisper quiet but babies start crying and dogs start barking whenever I press the CLANK-CLANK which is what I now call the "middle button" good thing the other mouse was never broken but i just feel like i'm running in circles 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 6 hours ago, Poof said: this new mouse is advertised as a quiet mouse but it's only 2/3s quiet. The left and right buttons are whisper quiet but babies start crying and dogs start barking whenever I press the CLANK-CLANK which is what I now call the "middle button" good thing the other mouse was never broken but i just feel like i'm running in circles I never trust "quiet" descriptions. I turned on my vibrator and I heard the miniature in the livingroom..... what's that noise ..... MOMA WHATS THAT NOISE ?!! ...... NOTHING!!! Goddammit 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katt_goddess Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 Dear 'x-treme cherry mixed fruit in light syrup' Cutting a cherry into 6 cherry slivers is not 'x-treme' . The only way this can could possibly be considered having extra cherries is if you counted the cherries on the label and included those in your final total. Which you probably did. Also those grapes looked like green-bean wood ticks. 1 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 This is some BULLSHIT. I had been planning to take a day trip with the miniature tomorrow to check out this museum .... it's a fucking blizzard outside right now .... in fucking March ... bruh WHAT?!! 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 I mean .... clearly not an actual blizzard but this is the south in March. It was 70 degrees Thursday!! 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Vamped said: I mean .... clearly not an actual blizzard but this is the south in March. It was 70 degrees Thursday!! "Oh it's not that much sn-" EARLIER THIS WEEK, SEVEN TORNADOES! NOW THERE'S SNOW AND I JUST Edited March 12, 2022 by Seight 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1pooh4u Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 9 minutes ago, Vamped said: I mean .... clearly not an actual blizzard but this is the south in March. It was 70 degrees Thursday!! Damn 😮 we’re getting hit tomorrow but it’s not unheard of for us. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 21 minutes ago, 1pooh4u said: Damn 😮 we’re getting hit tomorrow but it’s not unheard of for us. I-I just wanna go to the museum and see the dinosaurs 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1pooh4u Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 (edited) 41 minutes ago, Vamped said: I-I just wanna go to the museum and see the dinosaurs Maybe it’ll be fine by tomorrow? I feel so bad. Was the little one really looking forward to going too? ☹️ Edited March 12, 2022 by 1pooh4u Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 33 minutes ago, 1pooh4u said: Maybe it’ll be fine by tomorrow. I feel so bad? Was the little one really looking forward to going too? ☹️ Yeah ... we could probably try Sunday maybe. Supposed to be like 50 degrees 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1pooh4u Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 2 minutes ago, Vamped said: Yeah ... we could probably try Sunday maybe. Supposed to be like 50 degrees Hopefully you get to take him on Sunday. Museums with dinosaurs are the best. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 rip hp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
💜 mahala_la_la Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 TALKING LOUDER DOES NOT MAKE ME: - CARE MORE ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING - UNDERSTAND THINGS BETTER - REMEMBER THINGS THAT HAPPENED BEFORE I WAS BORN Is it any wonder people call you an asshole? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 14, 2022 Share Posted March 14, 2022 Why are these dinosaurs dead?!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted March 18, 2022 Share Posted March 18, 2022 I'm beginning to suspect Control Your Narrative is an attempt to see how often the casual wrestling fan can facepalm and not an actual pro wrestling company. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted March 18, 2022 Share Posted March 18, 2022 Me: "AHHAHA KENTUCKY LOST LOL" Me two hours later: "gotdamn that was way too close for my liking" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Top Gun Posted March 18, 2022 Share Posted March 18, 2022 Unfortunately the Peacocks seem to have taken the single "obscure blue-bird-themed 15-seed upsets major 2-seed" that was available. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katt_goddess Posted March 20, 2022 Share Posted March 20, 2022 If I blow out another splicer, the cable company is just going to leave me with a box of them and a pair of rubber gloves for going anywhere near any connections. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonSinger Posted March 21, 2022 Share Posted March 21, 2022 I hate my body so fucking much. All I gotta do is what I'm best at to score a nice check, but I'm so fucking slow and weak. Even with constant breaks, this is so fucking hard. Can my body just not be broken for one damn day? 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted March 22, 2022 Share Posted March 22, 2022 *at work, someone pulls up in a SUV for a meeting* *looks at the grill and realizes its a fucking JAGUAR SUV* many such cases 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 22, 2022 Share Posted March 22, 2022 I think I may just be a bad person. The discharge process at this rehabilitation place where my step-dad was at is ass. I had to leave work because my mom got too stressed out dealing with them and the VA. So I'm just sitting here .... making sure he doesn't fall off the couch while my mom goes to her doctor appointment and I'm just like .... this is dumb. I could be at work 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scoobdog Posted March 22, 2022 Share Posted March 22, 2022 1 hour ago, Vamped said: I think I may just be a bad person. The discharge process at this rehabilitation place where my step-dad was at is ass. I had to leave work because my mom got too stressed out dealing with them and the VA. So I'm just sitting here .... making sure he doesn't fall off the couch while my mom goes to her doctor appointment and I'm just like .... this is dumb. I could be at work You are definitely not a bad person. I typically disguise my own anxiety over incidents like this with disgust. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 22, 2022 Share Posted March 22, 2022 2 hours ago, scoobdog said: You are definitely not a bad person. I typically disguise my own anxiety over incidents like this with disgust. I think it's also kinda seeing first hand how this is never gonna be the same. All those little things you could probably go to your "dad" for is over. .... we have alot to do ... ALOT You mean I have to put air in my own tires now?!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rpgamer Posted March 22, 2022 Share Posted March 22, 2022 I hate my shitty fake-ass christian anti-trans anti-vax bigoted cunt of a boss. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 24, 2022 Share Posted March 24, 2022 I'm out of fake smiles today .... its not even 9:30 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 24, 2022 Share Posted March 24, 2022 So ... why did I waste my time making a referral for an organ transplant for this patient to waltz their ass up to the consultation and tell these people they are not getting a covid vaccine because its killing people ..... okay bruh ... I guess you dont want the new organ then. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rpgamer Posted March 24, 2022 Share Posted March 24, 2022 On 3/22/2022 at 6:34 PM, rpgamer said: I hate my shitty fake-ass christian anti-trans anti-vax bigoted cunt of a boss. And follow that up today with some missionaries bugging me in the parking lot. Before I've even parked my car. Keep pushing, bros, and I might just tell you what I really think about your genocidal cult. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 25, 2022 Share Posted March 25, 2022 Got word that a new patient was asking to talk to me so I was like .... OH HEY! I can knock out my assessments with them too. Me: How's it going? Them: ma'am? ......... MA'AM!!! Then she popped up and was like .... I NEED A TRANSPLANT WHEN I LOSE 45 LBS. So I was like .... okay are you working on the weight loss or have you lost the 45 lbs them: uh ... okay .... then 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seight Posted March 26, 2022 Share Posted March 26, 2022 Formula 1 at Circuit of the Americas: *strategic racing moves designed not to mess up millions of $ of sophisticated machinery* NASCAR at COTA: *extremely Thomas Jefferson in Frankenhole voice* FOUR MARTINSVILLES! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 28, 2022 Share Posted March 28, 2022 So I got food poisoning yesterday so I've been mostly unconscious until about 10pm last night. I took my at home rapid covid test which came back negative and called in sick to work ... the miniature wakes me up to tell me my phone is ringing ... step dad had yet another stroke and is back at the hospital .... I can't do anything or go anywhere right now people. I just want to sleep. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 29, 2022 Share Posted March 29, 2022 Turns out it wasn't food poisoning... I'm thinking a stomach virus because late last night I awoke to the sounds of gagging and vomiting and now the miniature is sick 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vamped Posted March 30, 2022 Share Posted March 30, 2022 Yes .... run straight past the bathroom and vomit in the middle of the livingroom 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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