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Is in a Big Mountain Fudge Cake tribute band.

Has the entire Jem and the Holograms discography on vinyl.

Won't be on the boards next summer because of his new job as the San Diego chicken.

Paid Disco 25 bucks to dunk a giant root beer float on top of someone’s head at a Mets game.

Eats his lunch on a see-saw every day.

Is in a KISS cover band called SMOOCH.

Created an online petition to get Judas Priest to change their name to Judas Chair.

Will fight anyone who says Batman Returns is not a Christmas movie.

Sidebar I have no shame in admitting that I actually a lot of Jem and the Holograms songs

Carries his lunch inside a Jem and the Holograms lunch box.

Performed a drive-by on the horsie ride outside the grocery store.

Carries his lunch inside a Mighty Mouse lunch box.

Tried to start a band called Megadeath but got a cease and desist letter from the attorney of Dave Mustaine, so he called his new band Megabirth instead.

All week I've had to come into work at 7:30 to make up time to come in late tomorrow. But god damn. Starting my days at 6 am and not getting home until 10-11pm is rough. (I work until 4:30 but then Im immediately babysitting at 5) I'm so tired. 😮‍💨 Gimme a blankey. Imma just nap under my desk. ... Also I accidently wore joggers instead of scrubs today. Whoops. Guess I'll be comfier all day.

Made Ghostrek sit on the Judas Chair because he wouldn't eat his liver and onions.

Is eating roast raccoon this Christmas.

Damn, that's how you porn you watch STARTS???

Came up with an idea for a funhouse where all walls are covered in bubble wrap, but shut it down when it got too expensive to keep replacing it.

I know what would probably make me feel better, but the will to actually get up and do it just isn’t there.

I thought kerrygold butter was supposed to be like top shelf butter. I got a small tub of kerrygold thinking it would be easy to spread, it's solid as a rock. I really wanted good quality bread and butter, instead i got bread with chunks of butter on it cuz the shit wouldnt spread to save its life. And the label says 'naturally softer', bullshit

Crunchyroll finally dislodges its head from its own ass and lets [as] start licensing stuff from them again. Because as their renewed relationship with Aniplex has proven, Sony ain't the fucking problem.

Milk ice cold is seriously delicious. Probably shouldn't drink it tho. Not confirmed if im lactose intolerant or not. XD But WHY SO GOOD

crab cake egg roll pop tart

Nuked a couple of frozen burritos with a handful of potato chips on the side. I was gonna go the even lazier route and do takeout, but it’s too cold outside.

who tf is this....Ike Jackson

How WWE pornos start 😆

Earned free pizza for life from Chuck E. Cheese when he dumped a box of diseased rats in the kitchen and complained to management about it.

Has a gang of raccoons follow him inside of Chuck E. Cheese, and one of the raccoons dropped a meth pipe in the ball pit.

Is the owner of the raccoon that was found passed out drunk at a liquor store. He's very disappointed that he fell off the wagon again.

Stuffs his pillow case with potato chips because he likes to feel the crunch.

Are raccoons just down bad right now. Last year the cops caught one with a meth pipe and now one was found passed out drunk in a liquor store bathroom.

Didn't know where else to put this

see, I couldn't respond to that because part of me wasn't sure if he meant "immortal".

looks like new yotk stirp stake to me

well, for the record...my first reply was indeed serious. But then the thread kinda started circling the drain so I just wanted to have fun talking about selling bath water

Watching someone out in public with their phone making a tiktok or whatever the hell their doing is surreal. Don't they realize how weird they look just randomly dancing in public or just walking around in public with your phone in your hand talking about some random random Internet bullshit. All the more reason why I don't going out in public because I don't want to get filmed by random ass weirdo.

I mean Trump told them to drink bleach during Covid, and they're still alive

Asked Santa Claus for a glockenspiel for Christmas.

has confessed his unbridled jealousy of stretch armstrong.

loves baking cherry pies from scratch, just so that when he's finally able to enjoy that first piece, he can serenade it to ''warrant's'' timeless classic......

Did this when Packard showed up on his doorstep looking for Mr. Hoonie.

Ran away like this when he saw Mr. Hoonie bent over.

Made this expression when he accidentally walked in Ghostrek in the shower

Tried to cook mashed potatoes in a hot tub.

Adult Swim will cease to be a channel after the WB sell off.