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UnevenEdge

Mix

Mixologist
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Mix last won the day on January 2 2020

Mix had the most liked content!

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About Mix

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    Freakin Mutant

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  1. You don't have to be a sick fuck to like a quick fuck. You could just be tired or busy or using someone as a human flesh light because they don't matter to you as a person.
  2. No, he's demonstrating the half-hearted ball cradling maneuver that Edna uses and she does not seem to be receiving the criticism well.
  3. Well actually it's a sex therapist and I'm going to her to fully understand and immerse myself in my fetishes. You guys are less understanding than that stripper.
  4. You could get that surgery where they break your shins and recast them with metal additions that give you a few more inches in height. It's only around 6 months to a year to recover, rehab, and learn how to walk again. We could do it together, with you going first and then me maybe.
  5. If you're going to lie on your dick, i've found it's best to lie big. A small lie turning a 5 to a 6 is embarrassing, but a big lie where you have a third leg that necessitates you buy the underwear with the special pouch is funny for all involved.... Sometimes
  6. - "So your fetishes are Asian women and feet?" - "Yeah, as far back as I can remember." - "Asian feet or just women's feet in general?" - "Just feet in general." - "Even men's feet?" - "Yeah" - "So Asian women for favorite people, but just any feet for favorite bodypart?" - "Yup, that's pretty much how i'm wired" - "And you have no idea why?" - "No, but I start therapy tomorrow, so I should start figuring all that out pretty soon." - "Ok, that's good. That'll be twenty for the lap dance and let's call it eighty for the shoes." - "Yeah, sorry about that. That's never happened to me before."
  7. Alright, back to not wanting them. That was a close one.
  8. inorite And how is that half inch measurement discrepancy the first go to when I gave myself a generous, and far more obvious, accounting down south. I'm not saying don't call me out on it, just follow protocol. There's an order to these things.* (*These things being the inevitable and all too deserving implosion of my relationships)
  9. I've never wanted to have kids.................until just right now. I'm gonna name it Nameraka.
  10. When they find out i'm actually 5'11.5", they react like it's the 1950's and i'm a black guy who's been passing for white. It's not that big of a lie, Kendra. I'm not trying to be too critical of your priorities, but there are some real red flags in that dating profile that got passed your vetting process.
  11. Alright, ok...... I am going to start and then quit smoking cigarettes. All the ensuing fury will be unleashed on everyone derailing my perfectly good thread.
  12. You've heard some version of that line in movies and tv shows, usually as the last words of a character at gun point. Is that line really so effective at preventing murder? Do would be murderers care so much about kids growing up with both parents? I don't think so. I do, however, believe it can be made so effective that homicide and orphanage statistics in this country will never be the same again. I propose a law that makes murderers responsible for raising the children of their victims. The death penalty is a slap on the wrist compared to PTA meetings and children's musicals....you die a thousand deaths.... With this law in effect, the next time you utter the phrase, "I have kids," it will have a resounding effect on all criminals within earshot. So, Sharks, i'm here to offer you ten percent of my new venture for half a million dollars. What do you say?
  13. No, the author, Orenthal Dolezal Ulysses James Woods Homer Simpson
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