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Toilet Bowl Destroyer
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About molarbear

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    something funny
  • Birthday 12/05/86

Recent Profile Visitors

  1. Does anyone still use last.fm?

    I use Pandora the most. Especially on commutes, it relaxes me just enough to not yell at someone for being a shitty driver
  2. cigarrette smokers

    Grizzly And no, I am not proud of myself
  3. Ichiro Suzuki's last game and retirement

    It's kind of bitter sweet. I mean he hasn't done so hot the last couple years but it still sucks to seem him go. At least he got to go out with the team he started his career in the MLB with and in his home Country.
  4. do you google yourself?

    Pssh.... no I use alta vista for that shit
  5. organic dirt

  6. when someone asks you if you are a god, you say

    I've clearly gone about my life entirely wrong up until this point
  7. My Dick is being a Dick

    My dick is usually a dick in the morning mainly when I first relieve my bladder and it decides to turn into a nerf octo blaster
  8. robot calls

    I dunno I don't bother to answer my phone if I don't recognize the number
  9. I finally know what a baby shower is

    I just pet the dog and zoned out. I think that's how I survived it
  10. I finally know what a baby shower is

    I got invited to my friend's wife's one because she says I'm one of her best friends I felt like a stranger in a strange land
  11. raise your hand if you love ass

    I seriously miss this show
  12. I've been doing a lot of pooping recently.

    Due to my bachelor lifestyle and diet which consists mainly of turkey sandwiches I have to monitor myself somewhat TL:DR went to Dr because I didn't make boom boom for 3 days, Doctor said "Eat a fucking salad you moron" in a very polite way
  13. Ouija board 2

    Meh I generally don't fuck with them but there was a cute girl in college that was all excited to try one. The little reading thing moved a just ever so slightly and she ran out the door screaming. I never heard from her again and it was her Ouija board. When I told my Dad about it it lead to an even funnier story he had about taking a girl on a date to see "The Exorcist" and the girl did the same thing.
  14. Happy Birthday 2TON

    take notes of what "over the hill" is so I can practice for it in 8 years
  15. I am God

    I'm guessing this is like one of those situations where someone says "Maybe" when they actually mean "No"