rants Haters/Complainers: Legacy of Spleen

[Clu]

Just now, garbagepailcat said:

I had to change the coil in my vape pen, and now it’s leaking sticky blue slushee juice everywhere. I don’t know how to make it stop. 

We get it... You.... Oh

[garbagepailcat]

1 minute ago, Clu said:

We get it... You.... Oh

I hate the appearance of vaping, but I haven’t smoked a cigarette in nearly a year. It works. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m down to zero nicotine, so I’ll be able to quit soon enough. 

[discolé monade]

go shit yourself, lowe's. 

piece of fuck store. 

 

[garbagepailcat]

anxiety attacks are the worst and I should probably see a doctor about it cause I feel like I’m having a heart attack and I can’t stop sobbing uncontrollably 

[Poof]

13 minutes ago, garbagepailcat said:

anxiety attacks are the worst and I should probably see a doctor about it cause I feel like I’m having a heart attack and I can’t stop sobbing uncontrollably 

 

[DragonSinger]

I hate that the person who caused my car accident in '05 will always occupy headspace because she's the reason why I'll be in daily pain for the rest of my life. 

[Poof]

Fuck this fucking asshole dentist. Pay now. I'm not sitting on the phone with you while you do it. We have done so many sessions. You know this is my fucking number. Quit fucking around.

[DragonSinger]

Why can't I just ignore the "RIP" comments on youtube clips featuring actors I didn't know were dead? My curiosity always gets the best of me, then I look it up and the actor never dies due to some drug shit or old age that you expect. It's always murdered or died some depressing way because of a painful disease. Every time.

[Gina Szanboti]

I need a new oven.  Some wires somewhere are shorting out and blowing the fuse, but I'm not sure I'm up for dismantling the whole thing to find out where.

I have to clean house before I can have someone install a new stove though.  So...probably not going to be baking anything for the foreseeable future.  I was trying to bake a cake last night, blew my last fuse 5 min in.  Ended up having to microwave it in a glass pie plate.  It looks like pink vomit, but it tastes fine.

[DragonSinger]

7 minutes ago, Gina Szanboti said:

I need a new oven.  Some wires somewhere are shorting out and blowing the fuse, but I'm not sure I'm up for dismantling the whole thing to find out where.

I have to clean house before I can have someone install a new stove though.  So...probably not going to be baking anything for the foreseeable future.  I was trying to bake a cake last night, blew my last fuse 5 min in.  Ended up having to microwave it in a glass pie plate.  It looks like pink vomit, but it tastes fine.

Are you able to steam the cake next time?

[garbagepailcat]

My methadone addict sister 

[Gina Szanboti]

4 hours ago, SorceressPol said:

Are you able to steam the cake next time?

I...don't know?  I'm having trouble envisioning what that means in practice.  The microwave actually worked surprisingly well, all fuck-ups considered (like it rising more than expected, and having to transfer the batter from the oven pan to the pie pan, which was a big mess).  It kinda cooked like a bundt cake with a dip in the center instead of a hole.  Came out really moist.

It's fine.  This sated my cake craving, so I won't need one for another year probably.   I can always buy one if I need a fix.

[wacky1980]

what's really cool is when you have an hour lunch break, and you spend it sitting in a restaurant, where it takes 45 minutes to get your food. 

it would be one thing if it was dinner. but this was lunch. and it wasn't the lunch special, because they were out by time we got there at 12:05. out of the lunch special. by five minutes past noon.

so we ordered fish tacos. it literally takes three minutes to fry up some fish, and maybe another 2 minutes to plate it. but that somehow took 45 minutes to progress from order to service.

yep, not going back there again.

[KimopoBotar]

Remember, if you go through life being kind and considerate, you never have to worry. If you're a dick, you might upset a crazy person and get hurt. 

Hopefully you learned that today, random driver. It only happened that i was going the same way, but seeing me follow you so closely after you fucked me over hopefully makes you think next time.

[DragonSinger]

These almost daily car accidents outside my subdivision are so fucking annoying! Now I literally have to plan my trips around them.

[katt_goddess]

Damnit KFC. Why are you so delicious? And yet you make my stomach hurt. 

[DragonSinger]

Me: This Hot & Spicy Chex Mix actually got some heat to them, so I should just eat 1 or 2 handfuls.

*After 4 handfuls, reaches into the bag again.*

 Why does Chex Mix do this to me?

[DragonSinger]

How the hell do I keep forgetting to buy oyster sauce?

[helpme]

8 hours ago, SorceressPol said:

How the hell do I keep forgetting to buy oyster sauce?

Cause you're not buying fresh oysters? 

[scoobdog]

25 minutes ago, helpme said:

Cause you're not buying fresh oysters? 

Not the same thing, dude.

[helpme]

8 minutes ago, scoobdog said:

Not the same thing, dude.

I'm trying to make a joke 

[DragonSinger]

41 minutes ago, helpme said:

Cause you're not buying fresh oysters? 

Shut up, Scoob.

[scoobdog]

36 minutes ago, helpme said:

I'm trying to make a joke 

Try harder.

32 minutes ago, SorceressPol said:

Shut up, Scoob.

 

[DragonSinger]

My dog is so disappointed that I can't walk him in the yard like he wants, but there are clouds of my deadly allergy all over the grass. People keep saying that bees are dying out, but they're certainly thriving here. And since his little Yorkiepoo ass wants to start shit with any animal in his territory, I definitely can't let him go alone because parts of the yard is high enough to hide copperheads.

[wacky1980]

ugh, i hate the rain. showers are ok. thunderstorms are ok. but torrential downpours fucking send me. my old house trained me to hate the rain, because every hard rain would take the basement sump pump right to its limit. even after i installed a battery backup. still couldn't get easy during heavy rain. after we moved in 2016, that kinda faded off. the new place gets a wet basement, but it's not finished so it doesn't bother me when a bit of water gets in. but now we're having issues at the bar. the city has chewed off the sealcoat in the alley and now the rainwater from the gutters doesn't run off into the storm sewers. it goes right down through the stripped road, finds its way through our foundation, and pools up in the basement there. it's been getting progressively worse with each heavy rain. i'm concerned a hard enough rain over a long enough time period is just gonna wash it out and the whole building will collapse. i've complained to the city three different times and they only respond with "it's on the list". great. cool.

i'm sure it's an irrational concern. i hope it is anyways. but its been bad enough lately that i'm taking xanax every time i know there's a big storm coming. not sure it helps. maybe i need one of those thundershirts people put on their dogs. anyways, this latest storm just sent round 1 past us, and we got about 1-1/2" of rain in 2 hours. there's more forecast for around 6pm, possibly that much again. it's kicking my ass just thinking about it headed this way. fuck.

[wacky1980]

well i blanked out for about 2 hours from he pills. back up now, and we're about 30 minutes from round 2 of this storm. it will move through quite a bit faster than the first one, so we might only get 1/4" this time. not sure if it's the reassurance of lower rainfall totals or the pills, but i'm feeling better about it this evening.

[Gina Szanboti]

We're at about 3x the normal ave. rainfall for May in the last 5 days and we're not done yet.  It's just weird, but I'm really not complaining - I love the low 60s temps before we shoot back up to 90s and we can use the additional rain for the aquifers.  It's the batshit unpredictability I don't like these days.

[Poof]

so the left speaker on these headphones has been dangling from the headset by the audio cable for like a month now. then today the right speaker stops working. why would it happen that way? 

[wacky1980]

and back to the rain. we got almost 2" last night, and we're gonna get up to that much more this evening. then we dry out for a whole day before the next rainmaker comes through on thursday/friday. i have two xanax left before i'm out again. at this point, i can probably go after my own rx for the shit, rather than bumming off my wife's aunt, the pill queen.

[DragonSinger]

Yayyy! I get to be vigilant all day because their are a pair of loose rottweilers in the neighborhood. I don't worry if it's just the one because it's likely to be my next door neighbor's dog who despite being screamed at constantly by its idiot owner, has never snapped at her so it's probably nonaggressive. Two of them probably means they're someone else's pets, and more than one unknown dog of big breeds like that wandering around makes me nervous.

[wacky1980]

tornado sirens. the damn tornado is like 10 miles north and moving away. is it totally necessary to blow those damn things for 30 minutes after the storm has passed?

[DragonSinger]

Trump voters are a plague. There isn't anything their hate doesn't infect and now rape victims around the world have to suffer because of the Trump administration. 

[DragonSinger]

I hate not being able to help out in the yard much during Spring or Summer. Everything becomes overgrown and it's just more work to do when the temps go down enough for the bees/yellow jackets to disappear.

[DragonSinger]

I hate that I'm too much of a wussy to watch When They See Us because that show will break me.

[mthor]

Isn't it enough to just lay the meat maxipad in the bottom of the packaging tray? I don't think it's going very far, and it will soak up the blood even if it isn't absolutely centered. Attaching it with Gorilla glue makes it extremely unpleasant and almost impossible to remove when it's time to recycle.

[DragonSinger]

I was prepared for this shit to go down, but fuck... 

[Gina Szanboti]

It's been dying for awhile now, but my 'e' key finally gave up the ghost this morning.   My computer is so old they no longer make this keyboard anymore.  Lots of ones are compatible I guess, but they also seem to have batteries that need recharging through ports I don't have. 

Looks like I just have to get used to remembering that 'e' is now F3.  It would have to be the most used letter in the alphabet.

Update:  So that didn't work out so well.  F3 is just too far a stretch for typing.  So now it's 3 --> e and F3 --> 3.  Ahh, that's much better.

Edited June 8, 2019 by Gina Szanboti

[discolé monade]

hi tooth. 

go fuck yourself. 

[katt_goddess]

Dear neighborhood idiots : 

Learn to cook. And learn to cook safe. This is the second time in two weeks that I've had to sit outside with my cat screaming in her carrier because one of you knuckle-draggers who deep-fries literally everything you eat decided to set something on fire and tried to put it out with water. The fire department doesn't even get fully kitted anymore, they just show up and ask us which floor. 

I was already in my pjs and it's a million degrees outside. You owe me some dignity, some cat treats, and a half hour of quality AC. Assholes. 

[helpme]

Dear sunshine 

Go fuck yourself 

 

"currently burnt"

[DragonSinger]

Awesome. Bigots are fucking up social media searches for writer stuff because they're using words incorrectly again. 

[mthor]

1 hour ago, SorceressPol said:

Awesome. Bigots are fucking up social media searches for writer stuff because they're using words incorrectly again. 

Almost no one words properly any more.

Noah Webster is rotating in his grave.

[DragonSinger]

*Sigh* I wish I was more ruthless.

Edited June 18, 2019 by SorceressPol

[DragonSinger]

FUUUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK!!!!!! I accidentally saw a spoilery pic on tumblr about the What We Do in the Shadows cameos! Waaaahhhh! That would have been the best surprise, and now I fucking know who will pop up. GODDAMMIT! Why do I have so much work right now and can't watch nice things?

[garbagepailcat]

For two years in a row my husband’s family have insisted on taking me out to dinner on my birthday. For two years in a row they have talked about my husband’s ex girlfriend during my goddamn birthday dinner. ITS FUCKING RUDE AND I DONT WANT TO BE HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE YOU ASSHOLES 

[Raptorpat]

i'm tired, cranky, and hair-trigger annoyed by everyone and everything

[DragonSinger]

There are cops everywhere hidden in every ditch they could fucking find. I think they're out in huge numbers to score easy traffic tickets from folks going to Bonnaroo. Can't wait to get out of Tennessee.

[wacky1980]

Not sure where else to post something like this.

So my wife got a call a bit ago. A buddy of ours killed his girlfriend tonight. Then he called another friend of his and told him what he had done. By the time the other guy got there, dude had already shot himself too. Apparently he missed though; only blew a hole in the side of his face, and is now on his way to the hospital. At least her kid wasn't at home.

I don't fucking understand people anymore.

[QueenoftheDorks]

Complaint about myself: Way to be a fucking asshole and not pay attention to what you were doing when you cleared your cache. Now you deleted all your saved username and passwords. I realize that's probably a good thing in the long run given how often shit gets hacked but do you know how much motherfucking work you gotta do now?  YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR FUCKING PASSWORD TO ANYTHING. NOW YOU HAVE TO RESET THEM ALL LIKE SOME KIND OF FUCKING OLD PERSON.

[DragonSinger]

Fuckity fuck fuck fuck. FFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCKKKK! I had a perfectly good plan and now I have to add another book from scratch to the mix. Yes, it's a big opportunity, but come on, I just got back in the saddle. Four weeks to do all of this? Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.