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UnevenEdge

A massive loser in love asking for your advice


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46 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

i agree most with what the Hound says. Treat her like a person. You wouldnt go up to a GUY you never talked to and ask them to hang out with you, right? Well, dont do that to a girl. Talk to her and at least get a name and find out of if you have interests in common and can actually carry on a convo before you ask her to hang out outside of work. Just because you find her attractive doesnt mean she wont annoy the fuck outta ya.

I'm prepared to take the "just because you find her attractive doesn't mean she won't annoy the fuck outta ya" risk. xD

It's weird comparing this situation to talking to a guy because talking to guy for the first time, it's not like I wanted to talk to that guy specifically, it's just that he happened to be right there. Talking to a woman you're interested in feels different, because it feels like I gotta create an excuse to talk to her for the first time, because they're never just right THERE by me anyway.

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5 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

I'm prepared to take the "just because you find her attractive doesn't mean she won't annoy the fuck outta ya" risk. xD

It's weird comparing this situation to talking to a guy because talking to guy for the first time, it's not like I wanted to talk to that guy specifically, it's just that he happened to be right there. Talking to a woman you're interested in feels different, because it feels like I gotta create an excuse to talk to her for the first time, because they're never just right THERE by me anyway.

light stalking and "being in the right place at the right time" is ok in my book >>  <<

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2 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

light stalking and "being in the right place at the right time" is ok in my book >>  <<

I tried that with another co-worker I was interested in many months ago. Didn't work, lol.

I actually tried that with yet another co-worker I was interested when I changed shifts, and it SORT of worked, as she included me in conversations... but she's married. But we're friends now, lol.

Oh but with the married woman we take breaks in the same areas generally, and those areas are small, and she sits in a place that's convenient, right by the men's bathroom at the corner of the table. xD

Edited by Doom Metal Alchemist
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58 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

I tried that with another co-worker I was interested in many months ago. Didn't work, lol.

I actually tried that with yet another co-worker I was interested when I changed shifts, and it SORT of worked, as she included me in conversations... but she's married. But we're friends now, lol.

Oh but with the married woman we take breaks in the same areas generally, and those areas are small, and she sits in a place that's convenient, right by the men's bathroom at the corner of the table. xD

There is no such thing as light stalking....Just stalking.  Don't be a stalker....Be a human and interact with other humans.  No one wants to awkwardly bump into you on the way to lunch or hear you bring up their favorite band out of context. 

Edited by Sho Minamimoto
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56 minutes ago, Sho Minamimoto said:

There is no such thing as light stalking....Just stalking.  Don't be a stalker....Be a human and interact with other humans.  No one wants to awkwardly bump into you on the way to lunch or hear you bring up their favorite band out of context. 

All I did was try to figure out where they sit in the break room and start sitting there. >_>

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1 hour ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

All I did was try to figure out where they sit in the break room and start sitting there. >_>

theres nothing wrong with this. you get closer to the people who interest you. people do the same to YOU if they like you!

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3 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

All I did was try to figure out where they sit in the break room and start sitting there. >_>

Not that I think you would be this creepy but let me tell you a story. So on some days when I venture out into the warehouse to pretend to look for something (really Im just hiding from the old ladies in the office), I usually see a few people about to start their shifts. I usually smile or speak to everyone because I think it makes me look less mean and Im southern .... anyway ... I started seeing this dude around so I speak and keep going on my way ... then I started seeing him every day so I was like .... eh I must leave at the start of his shift .... nothing out of the ordinary ... then when I got my orthopedic boot for my sprained ankle I stopped at the time clock to talk to this old lady and he just fucking swooped down off the conveyor belt and said.....I could massage your foot for you. 

>.> this creeped me right the fuck out so I was like lol nah Im good .... and began to hobble my ass out the door ... like dont stalk women ...obviously 

I go out of my way to avoid this dude and another old dude. I will literally walk 10 mins out of my way to avoid them ... on a sprained ankle

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4 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

All I did was try to figure out where they sit in the break room and start sitting there. >_>

See, that's weird....and probably one of the most obvious 6th grade tactics.  I know you don't have a lot of "outgoing" experience, so this seems like a good idea to you, but she probably has more and will sniff this shit out like Wolverine.....Especially if you have the balls to sit there, but still never speak to her because you get suddenly shy.

 

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10 minutes ago, Sho Minamimoto said:

See, that's weird....and probably one of the most obvious 6th grade tactics.  I know you don't have a lot of "outgoing" experience, so this seems like a good idea to you, but she probably has more and will sniff this shit out like Wolverine.....Especially if you have the balls to sit there, but still never speak to her because you get suddenly shy.

 

Well shit. xD :| o.O

But to be fair I end up doing similar shit unintentionally with groups of guys too... Like My usual spot will be taken so I'll find another spot with three dudes and an open chair and I'll just sit in the open chair and silently eat my snack.

Edited by Doom Metal Alchemist
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36 minutes ago, Vamped said:

Not that I think you would be this creepy but let me tell you a story. So on some days when I venture out into the warehouse to pretend to look for something (really Im just hiding from the old ladies in the office), I usually see a few people about to start their shifts. I usually smile or speak to everyone because I think it makes me look less mean and Im southern .... anyway ... I started seeing this dude around so I speak and keep going on my way ... then I started seeing him every day so I was like .... eh I must leave at the start of his shift .... nothing out of the ordinary ... then when I got my orthopedic boot for my sprained ankle I stopped at the time clock to talk to this old lady and he just fucking swooped down off the conveyor belt and said.....I could massage your foot for you. 

>.> this creeped me right the fuck out so I was like lol nah Im good .... and began to hobble my ass out the door ... like dont stalk women ...obviously 

I go out of my way to avoid this dude and another old dude. I will literally walk 10 mins out of my way to avoid them ... on a sprained ankle

Damn, that's awful.

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8 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Yeah.... For some reason I don't feel comfortable talking to my few irl friends / close relatives about my forever-aloneness.... it seems less embarrassing when talking to anonymous people online.

Babbling had Sponges back when he met his lady friend....We do ok work sometimes.  Plus you at least seem motivated.....Ghostrek is obviously gay, and Phillies won't go outside and I now suspect is a pedophile so that's for the best.......They are beyond our means to help, but you....I have confidence in you.

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27 minutes ago, Sho Minamimoto said:

See, that's weird....and probably one of the most obvious 6th grade tactics.  I know you don't have a lot of "outgoing" experience, so this seems like a good idea to you, but she probably has more and will sniff this shit out like Wolverine.....Especially if you have the balls to sit there, but still never speak to her because you get suddenly shy.

 

Yeah, reading this, my hopes are dashed and I think it's time to move on, lol. I actually did do this to this chick at least once back when it was more viable to take my lunch break in the main room where she did (and probably still does). And I may have done it again one time she randomly popped up at the break room that I use and usually don't see her at. 

Actually, a few days ago she "surprised" me and sat in the breakroom I use again but I had the good sense to avoid sitting anywhere near her this time. The two times I've seen her at that breakroom she's literally in one corner while I'm usually in the opposite corner on a daily basis. That day my normal spot was taken but I took an open spot close to it still far away from her. 

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2 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Yeah, reading this, my hopes are dashed and I think it's time to move on, lol. I actually did do this to this chick at least once back when it was more viable to take my lunch break in the main room where she did (and probably still does). And I may have done it again one time she randomly popped up at the break room that I use and usually don't see her at. 

Actually, a few days ago she "surprised" me and sat in the breakroom I use again but I had the good sense to avoid sitting anywhere near her this time. The two times I've seen her at that breakroom she's literally in one corner while I'm usually in the opposite corner on a daily basis. That day my normal spot was taken but I took an open spot close to it still far away from her. 

Damn doomer, don't do me like this.....I need you to get back in there and fight.

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Just now, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Wait, you still think I got a shot after that? I thought the point of what you wrote there was I probably creeped out anyone I did that to.

I mean imo, anything is salvageable until she tells you no or to go away....If you still haven't at least tried to talk to her, then I figure you owe it to yourself to try.....And I was just making the assumption that she may be more outgoing to you....There is still a chance that maybe she's pretty closed off herself.  Do you see other guys talking to her?

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7 minutes ago, Sho Minamimoto said:

I mean imo, anything is salvageable until she tells you no or to go away....If you still haven't at least tried to talk to her, then I figure you owe it to yourself to try.....And I was just making the assumption that she may be more outgoing to you....There is still a chance that maybe she's pretty closed off herself.  Do you see other guys talking to her?

I don't remember. I made it a point to not look in her direction a few days ago when she randomly showed up in the break room I use. The previous times I've seen her in break rooms is just too long ago to remember.

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17 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

I don't remember. I made it a point to not look in her direction a few days ago when she randomly showed up in the break room I use. 

Boy, you are not making this easy.  

I mean you seem smart, and you have a good sense of humor....You have all the tools to acquire her name and start some small talk.  

Edited by Sho Minamimoto
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Just now, Sho Minamimoto said:

Boy, you are not making this easy.  

I mean you seem smart, and you have a good sense of humor....You have all the tools to aquire her name and start some small talk.  

I literally lack the ability to make small talk. I seem to be able to do ok online. But irl, I'm usually just responding to what other people are saying.

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10 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

I literally lack the ability to make small talk. I seem to be able to do ok online. But irl, I'm usually just responding to what other people are saying.

How bad do you suck at small talk tho? If you really suck at small talk there's like no way you're going to make something happen w/a girl from work that you rarely even see

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Just now, Poof said:

How bad do you suck at small talk tho? If you suck at small talk there's like no way you're going to make something happen w/a girl from work that you rarely even see

Usually when I and a group of friends are sitting together I don't really say anything unless I feel its important or funny, or something. I am really bad at talking to fill silence. If it's me and two other friends, I usually just listen to the two other friends talk to each other and interject when I have something to say. When it's just me and one friend, well.... unless it's one of my friends that literally never stops talking (and I have a couple) then there'll probably be a lot of awkward silences.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, I fail at life.

Lately she's been taking her last break of the shift in the same break area I take mine.... but she sits in the opposite corner that I do.... Due to what I've already done and some comments in this thread, I'm too afraid to go sit by her again (and remain silent and have her wonder I'm sitting by her)...

Welp, last night she threw me for a loop at sat pretty near where I usually sit... and she was by herself too... Instead of sitting next to her, I was going to sit in my normal spot.... but the small space to walk in between tables would have made it too awkward to sit in my normal spot, due to where she was sitting... It was like the clouds opened up, and God himself intervened, giving me the perfect excuse to sit by her at break and talk to her.

So, did I? Nope, I walked passed her, sat in a spot not really by her and not where I normally sit either, and said nothing to her.

Slow clap for Doom, everybody.

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3 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Well, I fail at life.

Lately she's been taking her last break of the shift in the same break area I take mine.... but she sits in the opposite corner that I do.... Due to what I've already done and some comments in this thread, I'm too afraid to go sit by her again (and remain silent and have her wonder I'm sitting by her)...

Welp, last night she threw me for a loop at sat pretty near where I usually sit... and she was by herself too... Instead of sitting next to her, I was going to sit in my normal spot.... but the small space to walk in between tables would have made it too awkward to sit in my normal spot, due to where she was sitting... It was like the clouds opened up, and God himself intervened, giving me the perfect excuse to sit by her at break and talk to her.

So, did I? Nope, I walked passed her, sat in a spot not really by her and not where I normally sit either, and said nothing to her.

Slow clap for Doom, everybody.

GODDAMMIT! 

You even had divine intervention and you still didnt do it?!

You've insulted the Gods 

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3 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Well, I fail at life.

Lately she's been taking her last break of the shift in the same break area I take mine.... but she sits in the opposite corner that I do.... Due to what I've already done and some comments in this thread, I'm too afraid to go sit by her again (and remain silent and have her wonder I'm sitting by her)...

Welp, last night she threw me for a loop at sat pretty near where I usually sit... and she was by herself too... Instead of sitting next to her, I was going to sit in my normal spot.... but the small space to walk in between tables would have made it too awkward to sit in my normal spot, due to where she was sitting... It was like the clouds opened up, and God himself intervened, giving me the perfect excuse to sit by her at break and talk to her.

So, did I? Nope, I walked passed her, sat in a spot not really by her and not where I normally sit either, and said nothing to her.

Slow clap for Doom, everybody.

Fucking shit... Does she have to walk over and grab your crotch for you to get the sign?

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3 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Well, I fail at life.

Lately she's been taking her last break of the shift in the same break area I take mine.... but she sits in the opposite corner that I do.... Due to what I've already done and some comments in this thread, I'm too afraid to go sit by her again (and remain silent and have her wonder I'm sitting by her)...

Welp, last night she threw me for a loop at sat pretty near where I usually sit... and she was by herself too... Instead of sitting next to her, I was going to sit in my normal spot.... but the small space to walk in between tables would have made it too awkward to sit in my normal spot, due to where she was sitting... It was like the clouds opened up, and God himself intervened, giving me the perfect excuse to sit by her at break and talk to her.

So, did I? Nope, I walked passed her, sat in a spot not really by her and not where I normally sit either, and said nothing to her.

Slow clap for Doom, everybody.

what are you afraid is gonng happen if you say hi?

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3 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

Well, I fail at life.

Lately she's been taking her last break of the shift in the same break area I take mine.... but she sits in the opposite corner that I do.... Due to what I've already done and some comments in this thread, I'm too afraid to go sit by her again (and remain silent and have her wonder I'm sitting by her)...

Welp, last night she threw me for a loop at sat pretty near where I usually sit... and she was by herself too... Instead of sitting next to her, I was going to sit in my normal spot.... but the small space to walk in between tables would have made it too awkward to sit in my normal spot, due to where she was sitting... It was like the clouds opened up, and God himself intervened, giving me the perfect excuse to sit by her at break and talk to her.

So, did I? Nope, I walked passed her, sat in a spot not really by her and not where I normally sit either, and said nothing to her.

Slow clap for Doom, everybody.

YOU SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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19 hours ago, Poof said:

what are you afraid is gonng happen if you say hi?

Well, there's really 2 things about this...

1) There's just a shyness and fear of rejection that I've had for decades that overrides logic. I know it's irrational. But that doesn't make it any easier to get over in the moment.

2) These past few weeks, I think she's been sending me signals.... but I do not think they are positive ones.... A couple times I would by happenstance be following her to the break area (not at all on purpose, we just happen to get to the walkway at the same time, and the walkway is very narrow so I can't just walk past her and her friend, so I have to follow behind, which is always awkward for me, because I'm generally a very fast walker). And sometimes, she'll just turn back and look at me, not saying anything. She doesn't smile while she's doing it. I fear she's been trying to tell me to leave her alone. I don't know. I haven't told a soul outside of you guys and my ex-bandmate that I'm interested in her, but it is very obvious she is very aware I am interested in her. I guess I made my attraction to her a little too obvious on accident, and I don't think it went over too well.

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2 hours ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

it is very obvious she is very aware I am interested in her. 

I doubt that...I doubt she knows you're interested and her looks back, which I'll assume you ducked your head when she did, only makes her wonder if maybe you are making these encounters happen on purpose, or she may be, and believe me...This is a thing, just annoyed that you won't take the shot when you have the opportunity.

I get the fear of rejection thing...I remember those feeling....When I was fucking 13.  

Look man, as I've said, you're funny here, so the ammo is in your head...You're just terrified to pull the trigger irl....

Let me ask this....Have you ever been rejected...Like blatantly rejected....Not just in your head in a situation where you just gave up....Has a woman ever just swatted down your advances?  See, because rejection isn't that bad....It's normally (unless she's a huge bitch) not as bad as you think it will be....I can count on 1 hand the times I've just been actually rejected.....Back in college I tried to talk to this girl and the "rejection" was simply "I have a girlfriend"....You might learn something....I doubt shes going to be like "how dare you talk to me you filthy nerd"....I can almost guarantee that's not going to happen.

But no amount of typing is going to fix this....and no amount of ignoring your feelings will make them go away.  I still have faith in you....I'm not ready to recommend hookers to you just yet like we did for Ghost.  

Edited by CryingFreeman
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