Doom Metal Alchemist

Damn! In all honesty, I probably won't fap tonight. I mean, maybe I will. I don't really plan on it though.

I saw something like that on HBO's Real Sex once when I was a kid. That segment sticks out in my mind because it featured the hottest chick I ever saw on that show (a cute red head with large natural tits), and her husband looked like he could've been in Black Sabbath circa 1987 - 1995.

Is sex between you two so horrible you'd rather pass out then have it?

@Naraku4656 Granted, but it's the power of Courtney Love. I want the power to change the TV channel with only my mind.

He's part of the conspiracy, duh.

Happy belated, distorted!

That's a long fucking gif for three words.

Where the fuck do you live where movie theaters sell smokes?

Well technically he likes women older than him. But you make a good point none the less.

I'm ready for spring.

I eat/drink way too much sugar these days. Got to keep up my energy levels somehow. Coffee doesn't seem to help as much as Mountain Dew and snake cakes.

Granted, but the only ninja power you have is the retarded way Naruto characters run. I want the power to control where and how my facial hair does and doesn't grow without any effort.

WAY back when, Theme of Love used to be the one tune from that game I actively disliked. In adulthood I like it a lot now.

I'm wondering if that's photoshop... you telling me she's that fat, but NONE of it went to her face?

While I do plan on having pizza for dinner tonight, I have no plans to get it heart shaped. I figure the shape of the slices might be weird to hold. Also I wonder if it costs extra. Also I wonder if the new pizza place I like is even offering that.

Oh, i < 3u, I GET IT

Last night my manager gave me M&Ms, I guess just because. I was waiting for our "stand up" meeting after lunch, he walked past me and just gave me a small bag of M&Ms, saying nothing but "here." Of course I ate them.

So.... it's just a giant international conspiracy between the U.S., Russia, and China? https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/02/world/asia/china-change-4-moon.html

I'm guessing chicken nuggets made from chicken breast.

I've been on meds for over 10 years, lol.

"Seamen" is indeed a word, but not the word you mean.

Funny he's spelling "doughnut" correctly, but not "semen."

Granted, but you only get to control water contained in a drinking glass. I want the power to turn into a dinosaur.

Yeah fuggs, stop eating sailors!