Doom Metal Alchemist

Yeah, high school me learned from the School of Hard Knocks not to let unrequited crushes build up too much. And I'm generally ok with rejection, and I ask out women so infrequently that when I do, and even when they turn me down, I am proud of myself for actually going for it.

Your financial advisor is secretly a UEMBer!

I'll read those later, I have to start getting ready for work in like 10 minutes.

We see each other so infrequently and people in my department have no contact with people in her department so I'm not at all worried about bad shit happening if a relationship happens but goes south.

The problem is, whenever I see her, it's while I am about to go do my job either at start of shift or after break, so I have no time to start a conversation when I see her. Yeah, I am definitely avoiding the word "date," since I can't even get to know her actually during work. I figured I'd say "want to hang out sometime?"

No pics, I forgot to mention, I don't even know her name (like I said I would have to introduce myself to her, I'm sure she doesn't know my name either).

So there is this incredibly hot chick I occasionally see at work. I barely see her because she works on mostly different days than me (we used to work on the same schedule, but I eventually transferred to a different schedule, now we only have one work day in common), she works in a different department, and she takes her breaks in different break areas than I do. I take my breaks in the break areas I do out of convenience and the ones she (probably) takes her breaks at her too long of a walk from wear I am working. I really want to ask this girl out, but I feel I have no way of getting to know her first because of the above. Would it be creepy or whatever that the next time we randomly cross paths for me to just introduce my self to her, tell her I've noticed her around the building and because I feel there's no way we'll get to know each other otherwise, and ask her if she would want to hang out sometime? Note that I'm pretty sure she has noticed me like I have noticed her, it just seems she is very aware of me. I probably made it obvious (accidentally) the first time I saw her. But I don't know if she's thinking "there's that cute guy that probably likes me" or "there's that creepy guy that probably likes me."

Happy birthday!

The best part of that is the question mark, because without the explanation, who the fuck would've gotten it?

"Flew"?

I don't know what that is, but it pissed me off to no end when classic rock stations started playing nu-metal and post-grunge. And that was like 6 years ago.

I was already well into college before "scene kids" became a thing, so I was never scene at all.

Hahaha, that is reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally tricky.... don't want to get in trouble for sexual harassment...

Got some money to blow, literally.

While I was working last night, that "Working as a waitress in a cocktail bar" song from the 80s randomly popped into my head (and that is literally the only (partial) line from the song I know)... And maybe it's just because I don't drink, but... WTF is a cocktail bar? If you order a beer in a cocktail bar, do they go, "Sorry, we don't serve beer here, only cocktails. This is a cocktail bar."?

No need to call my mom; I live with her.

As much as I agree in a certain respect, I think I still prefer remakes over the endless parade of super hero movies.

All I'm really familiar with are NES, SNES, and N64. SNES was by far the best of the three, as far as I'm concerned. Super Mario World, Earthworm Jim 1 and 2, Final Fantasy IV and VI, A Link to the Past, Super Mario Kart, Super Metroid, Chrono Trigger, Secret of Mana, home ports of Mortal Kombat 1 and 2 and Street Fighter II (and Turbo), Super Castlevania 4, Donkey Kong Country 1 and 2 (never played 3), Mega Man X 1 and 2 (never played 3).... Just stomps all over NES and N64 imo.

Didn't even crack a smile. Also a long time ago Family Guy did a similar pun with "Amish." "I knew something was Amish" instead of "amiss."

Happy belated!

Dude, are there even any other country singers with long hair besides Willy Nelson?

I hate it when that happens. Especially if you're around people and you're self conscious you're bothering everybody and there's nothing you can do about it.

One time my brother found a fraudulent charge on his credit card from Guitar Center and asked if it was me. He was concerned it might have been because I used his computer once, I had an education in IT, and that I play guitar. I would never do that to anyone, let alone my own brother. I told him no, but he still thought it was probably me. That really hurt. He did some digging and found out the guitar had been shipped to an address in a completely different state, so that was proof enough to him that it wasn't me. He then apologized for accusing me. Another time I was sleeping and my dad woke me up all urgently and said he just stopped a $400 something charge from Amazon going through because my credit card (under my dad's account) had been compromised. I was like "no, that was me, I just ordered my text books for the upcoming semester. Didn't I tell you?" I thought I told him I ordered them but he said I didn't tell him. Oh well.

How can you tell you have both allergies and a cold?

Online, sure, but not on UEMB.