molarbear

I was afraid you were going to drop the L word on me and I'd have to shut you down

food poisoning took me down for a whole day once, I honestly thought I was dying because it was coming out both ends at the same time. I'm also prone to panic attacks so sometimes my brain can just take me down for a couple hours without notice

I actually just finished the book about 3 weeks ago. I'm kind of hyped for the movie but with Stephen King film adaptions you never know, the first one was good so here's hoping the new one is.

me too, I smell like chlorine and I'm pretty sure I ingested more than a doctor would recommend

I shot water out of my nose I sorry that I have but one like to give to your response

Next time Gadget.......next time

They all have holes in them because of the way I walk They're not efficient sperm receptors

I'm also not in her bed right now so I'll meet you halfway on that argument

you missed the stud part

sounds like a good birthday

They mistakenly invited my friends and I to use their pool while they're out of town This is going to sound like a zeni thread but my friend's wife's sister was literally "who's going to drive me home?" Then she kept throwing the beer pong ball at me and asking me to drive her car home. I'm not use to being hit on and I'm terrible at picking up on it when it's happening needless to say I kind of want to punch myself in the dick for not picking up on it because she's pretty attractive /blog TL:DR i'm fucking stupid

[/u] story of my life

Nah, I may have a happy ending out of this one

Nah it was an actual pupper but I'd pet the fuck out of a bear if I knew it wasn't going to rearrange my face in a way that I'd die

No, my friends were there..... there were just strangers also and the 3 doggos kept me company

I know it's May but we had a pool party at my friend's house (who happens to be out of town) Long story short, there were 3 dogs and I gave them all equal pets and told them all they were good doggos

I kept thinking you meant rank like board wise I was confused I'm going back to drinking

Has anyone ever asked you to be derogatory towards One eyed, one horned, flying purple people eaters?

The Church says you can't fap ......Men tonight we bath in the blood of our enemies

Could you imagine a world where there was no fapping? Fuck dude, Dudes would be walking around with hard ons all day and a slight breeze would just set them off Not to mention all the death and destruction that it would bring

You're not suppose to think and drink, that's a terrible combination Just shut your brain off

I didn't see the FX at the bottom and was terribly afraid that lady existed

I would have broke into a dead sprint at that point

Herbalife needs people to buy into their pyramid scheme here

This beats the time a hobo asked me why the sun was so bright, at 11 pm.