EmpressAngel

No thank you.

Hero- Please don't kill my boyfriend, show. Aizawa might be dead but that's not my fault. Yesss rip off that hideous suit. All Might is pissed and dam if I'm not into that. Eat shit, hand guy. AIM FOR HIS BALLS, BOYFRIEND. Smash me you strong mother fucker. I enjoy ball kid. Ohhhh no you just jinxed him. I just lost Avdol I can't watch another boyfriend die! FUUUUUCK. This is an unfair fight. I will kill these guys myself. I love my son. Thanks Bakugo, you unlikable bitch. ICY HOT TO THE RESCUE. And also that other kid whose powers I don't actually know but still appreciate. Meanwhile y'all need to get that man to a hospital now. Oh hey, space lady's alive too. Bakugo not being a stupid bastard, it's a Christmas miracle. Aw fuck that thing's still alive. Use Bakugo as a shield! BOYFRIEND NO HE'S NOT WORTH IT. God look at those arms they're probably bigger than my waist. Shut up, hand douche. Hey that's okay, some dudes only need a minute to get the job done. Try aiming for his nasty exposed brain. This is going to break me when he dies. His shirt is not getting shredded enough. Those other teachers sure are taking their sweet fucking time getting there. Now get him to the hospital immediately. If he survives this he can destroy me. I'll give him 300 blows alright! Watching this show is just equal parts existential dread that I'm about to watch another boyfriend die and filthy comments in response to innocent phrases. PTE- Aw crap we wandered into another anime. Oh god they're the parents. Girl the sibling thing has never stopped any charactere in an anime before. Puppet shows and Gundam dancing. And then he died. Oh no they're the twins now. I would watch an entire cooking show with them. Don't trust that owl. What in the fuck. That's not an overreaction, having the hiccups is just that annoying. That was a great M**key M**se impression. Bye bunny. The Marilyn Monroe bit is even better with the dudes. Jojo- Oh shit the shades are off, Kakyoin's serious. Joseph is Spiderman tonight. Well that's depressing. I MISS THEM TOO. Random naked Holly. Man, this flashback focus really isn't boding well for him. EAT SHIT, DIO. Oh shit you messed up his cape. I'm glad Kakyoin is here to be the smart guy while Avdol's out getting pizza. What the fuck just happened. Ohhh that can't be good. This is a fucking depressing inner monologue. He's hunting milfs in heaven now. At least Kakyoin got to have a sad flashback and dying analysis, Avdol just got fucking eaten. Fuck you Dio. Hey Dio remember when Erina punched you in the face because I bet you're still salty about that. He could have just written it on his arm like he did with the baby stand. Am I a bad person for being a little relieved that at least Avdol wasn't the only dude who died? Spider-Joseph is way too much fun for this situation. Aw FUCK that is some overpowered shit. Oh man I didn't notice that he got a hole punched straight through him. I wonder what they told Kakyoin's parents? Damn grandpa open that shirt more. Damn Dio can get a lot done in four seconds. These bystanders are all going to die. Oh hey Jotaro you should probably run. Whelp, you're fucked. RIP cat. Really emphasizing that buldge there, animators. NO NOT JOSEPH TOO HE'S ALL I HAVE LEFT. It took 50 years but my curse finally hit joseph. You fabulous bitch. Jotaro why are you wearing such expensive pants to a fight?! Hunter- You should probably feel a little ashamed that you're getting your ass kicked so hard by this kid. Don't fall for this it's a trick. Oh you dick. Jesus girl what the fuck games are you playing? This is just depressing kid night all around, huh? Someone hug this poor kid. I am uncomfortable watching him laugh. What the hell. Well if you were looking for a way to frazzle her, you fucking found it. This girl is so sweet oh my god. The catastrophe is that he's losing at a children's board game. Wow that nurse is terrifying. I AM THE NIGHT. Oh no stop doing the Naruto run. He's a bush. Dude put some leaves on your ass too. Oh hey, I'm surprised the leader's still alive. Nice eyebrows, loser. Thanks for all that info I won't remember, narrator. Y'know buddy I'm sure the chain smoking isn't helping. Of course what he really needed was some whores. Sinkerbelle would be a great name for a battleship. Man, Palm really cleans up well. Clover- They're probably all drunk like I desperately wish I was right now. Yeah I'm sure the lesbian squad will let you in. This is the most tolerable they'v ever been. Hey there Cap'n Sexy. Why are none of you dead already? Calm your shit, nobody else wants to fuck your child sister. Great, now you've got a cave full of annoying crying chidlren. I want sister fucker to die painfuly. Give up on the nun fetish, you dipshit. Oh great, this bitch is back. Oh hey, does Yami finally get to do something? Kick her ass, nun. I enjoy seeing Asta in pain. Thank god nun lady is the single tolerable person in this arc. And then he was the Hulk. Again I ask, are we seriously supposed to enjoy this sack of shit who wants to fuck his baby sister? Naruto- Yeah that guy with 20 magic eyes and a tree wizard growing out of his arm couldn't beat Sasuke but I'm sure your dumb ass can really get the job done. Good job Sai, actually being a voice of reason that they are not going to listen to at all. Just let her get herself killed. NOBODY GIVES A SHIT, SAKURA. Sasuke give him a cheeseburger once when they were 12 and from that moment on Naruto was hopelessly in love with him. Were their voices always this fucking annoying back then or did they make them sound worse for the flashback? This is painful to watch. Is the entire episode just gonna be Sakura whining for 30 goddamn minutes? Oh hey, halfway through the episode and someting is finally happening. CAW. No, let him go on a self-destructive rampage and get himself killed. Huh, bitch is still alive. Wow, I care even less about her flashback than I did about Sakura's. That's not how glasses work show, your vision doesn't graduallly unblur after several seconds it pretty much just gets clear instantly. Maybe I'll luck out and he'll kill both thirsty idiots at once.

It took 50 years, but my boyfriend curse finally hit Joseph in full force. Just gonna leave this here:

The good thing about Jojo is that if you like the general concept of stands, there's probably at least one part that will appeal to you. Didn't like the world-traveling quest to kick a sexy vampire's ass? How about a small town cat-and-mouse murder mystery? Or Italian Mafia wars? Or a prison break? Or a wild west horse race? Or....whatever the hell part 8 is about, literally nobody knows what's going on?

I think the show being called Jojo's Bizarre Adventure already made that pretty clear long before now.

Hero- "EAT MY STICKY BALLS" is never gonna get old. I love Tsu. I'm proud of you, Icy Hot. Goddamn he does not fuck around. All of these kids are great and I love them. Man, Ball Boy is gonna be disappointed he missed the titties. I am surprised and impressed at Aizawa's skills. GODDAMN HANDS. What the fuck IS that hand guy's power? Oh fuuuuuuck. You go, space lady. Hexxus can fuck off. Oh this could be going better. MIGI SMASH. Ohhhh this is bad. Aizawa might be dead. It's a nice change of pace to see Bakugo actually being useful instead of an unlikable bastard. Oh nope, I spoke too soon on that. He just killed that guy from HxH. Good job furry boy. EAT SHIT, HEXXUS. Run faster, Iida! Jesus, show. I'd like to get off this ride now. Can't blame Ball Boy for trying. I am concerned. If you touch that frog I'll kill you myself. Well now he's dead for real. Deku is my role model. OH FUUUUUUUUUCK. This is definitely not a good thing. OH THANK GOD IT'S BOYFRIEND. Oh wait shit this is where he's gonna die isn't it. I just lost Avdol I can't watch another one die so soon! PTE- Don't bring logic into this show, random man. Awww puppy. And then it was Mario Kart. PENGUINS NO. What in the hell. SHE'S A ROBOT! Oh god the random Top Gun. I always fucking hated that mine cart level in Donky Kong. The music videos in this show are so much better than the ones Toonami constantly forces on us. This is a great song. That is not a cat and I'm uncomfortable. I like that the little one's main trait is anger issues. Jojo- Sorry Polnareff, you ran out of friends to die for you. Dio is going to fuck you now whether you like it or not. He's just trolling you now. He has a fog machine behind him. Dio you look like you pulled that track suit out of the dumpster behind a Cairo thrift store and cut the crotch out of it. Dude, Avdol had to jump out a window to avoid getting fucked by Dio; you are not gonna win here. MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA. Oh thank god Joseph, console me. Nothing you can say would be hard to believe at this point. Losing both Avdol and Iggy for Polnareff was the worst fucking trade. Thanks, dude in the bag. Every bad thing that's happened in the past hundred years is Dio's fault. Kakyoin looks cool with his shades. Well that's different. I guess his stand is teleporting? Polnareff you stupid fuck. Y'all know you can't fly right? There's no comment I could make about shoving things up Joseph's ass. I bet Avdol could have figured out his stand in time but HE HAD TO DIE AGAIN. I love how many problems are solved by Joseph being filthy rich. Oh great he added a cape made from an old curtain to that terrible outfit. Oh no stay away from Polnareff everyone who helps him dies. God what is with the clothing choices in this show. WILSON PHILLIPS, NO. Dio you fabulous bitch. Senator Wilson Phillips is losing his goddamn mind. Seitz is really nailing the whole fabulous bitch mood here. I don't think that's gonna hurt a super vampire, buddy. You might wanna dodge that. Uhhh Kakyoin your face is bleeding. He threw the fucking senator at them. Protect Joseph, he's all I have left. Hunter- That is entirely too many human snacks. Dang that dude's got some speed. That's a really useful power. Fuck off Thundercat let he man sleep. Wow he's annoying. Kick his ass, little girl. Oh hey, turtle Mewtwo finally gives the small child a damn challenge. Eat shit, king dick. Wait, how old is this kid if she was making up new moves a decade ago? Someone please hug this little girl. Get that dude some Ritalin already. Suck it, you dumbass cat. And that's why smoking is cool, kids! Oh come on that is some bullshit. Dumb bastard fell for the shadow clone jutsu. Wow you are just awful as shit aren't you. Okay the lobster one just makes me laugh. That's a cool power. The other cat guy looks like Jack Black's fursona. I think that's called friendshop. Clover- I hate you all. You gotta stab the snow. Why is the sister fucker allowed to goddamn exist? This isn't fun to watch, show. Why does anyone like Asta? Somebody's definitely about to get molested. Yes, think of that mirror as your big brother and keep it under your clothes. At least if that kid dies he doesn't have to be in this show anymore. Make the disgusting sister fucker repair the wall he broke. Oh great it's that obnoxious douche. Christ this dude is just fucking awful. I hope he dies painfully. Hitting kids with a sword works great. This old nun actually manages to be a decent character. I would feel safer bleeding out in front of Dio than sticking with Asta. Sorry snow dude, you can't beat a man's sickening boner for his toddler sister. Nothing gives you the element of surprise like BARGING IN AND SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF YOUR FUCKING LUNGS. Every moment I have to watch this guy and he isn't being stabbed makes me hate the universe. Every minute of this arc makes me feel unclean. Naruto- Please let them kill each other already. Man for trained ninjas these people seem to fall for basic illusion tricks at an alarming rate. Thanks for wasting several minutes explaining the tactic that we just saw and had already figured out. Oh what the fuck now. I wish I didn't have to watch this bitch have an orgasm every time she heals him. Uhhh dude you got a tree growing out of you. Just let him kill her. Ohh girl he is gonna stab you with that lightsaber to get to him. And nothing of value was lost. Did his sharingan change eyes or have I just not been paying attention? Yes Sasuke's a terrible person, this fact shouldn't surprise you at all after spending two minutes with him. Yeah just limp away like a little bitch. Oh hey he was kind of hot back in the day. Why are you showing me all these flashbacks I don't care about? Oh my god just die already. I'm sure this would be a very emotional scene if he wasn't such a crusty old bag of dicks.

Dio's outfit looks like he pulled an old track suit out of the dumpster behind the Cairo Goodwill and cut the crotch out of it.

It is absolutely not gonna be the depressing magical girl show deconstruction. Where did you even get?that idea?

Okay but "hardcore Dragon Ball fan" is damn near the least threatening phrase I've ever seen.

Hero- Aizawa finally gets serious. You assholes stay away from my boyfriend and most of these kids. What the fuck is that guys power, hands? I hope his trick is a machine gun. Dang where do I get one of those scarves? He's suddenly so cool. Fuck you, shadow dude. Oh you idiot children. Ohhh tha is not a good thing. Fuck you shark man. I love frog girl. Oh god this kid. He's the best hero and everyone loves him. ICE TO MEET YOU. These kids are all so great except Bakugo. Small Might is worried and needs a hug. What is the principal. Oh no he never shuts up. Meanwhile, death and destruction. Surveillance Migi with the assist. You could have just sent Invisible Girl. Emergency Exit. Cry harder, Berry Boy. Ribbit. That stomach thing sounds horrifying. Sticky balls is probably not gonna help you much. Bounce off his balls to jump to safety. I'm so proud of my son and his broken hand. Hold onto those frog boobs for dear life. Okay "EAT MY STICKY BALLS" is a pretty great insult. These kids all better get an A. PTE- That's how I feel getting ready for work every day. I like the angry little ginger one, she gets me. Nice mustache. COME AT ME, BROSEPH. This clone thing seems like a real bad idea. She's M Bison. I stil don't really understand the French part. She's got a point, bread is pretty great. That red panda is terrifying. She's so fucking angry. I'm disappointed that she didn't smash that clock at the end of the dude half. Jojo- Hold me Joseph you're all I have left. Kakyoin looks cool with his sunglasses. ORA. Avdol didn't die so you could pussy out of this at the end. Please save Iggy. Avdol was too good for this place. Oh hey he's alive. IGGY NO. Polnareff's right, why is he of all people the only one who survived. Eat shit, ya pantsless dickbag. Iggy was perfect and we didn't deserve him. OH MY GOD JUST DIE ALREADY. We could have saved so much time and lives if Joseph had just taught Avdol some hamon earlier. UH GUYS I DON'T THINK AVDOL'S GONNA GET BETTER. Now get that French man some medical attention. Meanwhile, Suzi is still a dingbat and I love her. Nice turtle. Y'all should probably tell her the bad news before she gets there. Okay the naked milf does make me feel a little better. SUZI NO. Roses doesn't fuck around. Please give Suzi a hug. This is so sweet. Oh yeah I'm sure this whacko will do just great against them. This is clearly fake because no bitch would leave Dio's bedroom. Jotaro what the fuck. That may be the weirdest power of all. Christ Polnareff just go to a hospital. Aw fuck you're dead. Hunter- Good luck, little blind girl. Damn this kid's got some serious eyebrows. She's so dumb I like her. Please take off your shirt and go help Killua. I never noticed that Shoot doesn't have eyebrows. HI DOGS. Awww Knuckle that's so sweet. He's being surprisingly nice about this game. Whelp so much for that. That's a goddamn stand it's even a music reference. Well now you've jinxed yourself. Goddammit Thundercat. Hit him in the face with your giant goddamn pipe. What the shit? Well this could probably be going better. Smash his giant hourglass, maybe that'll work. HAMMER. I wish I could fall asleep that fast. Wait is that one pregnant because that's terrifying. Make the king your bitch, little girl. Clover- Those agonized grunting sounds are how I feel. Please someone stab him. For the love of god, buy something besides potatoes for a change. I'll admit I do love payday too. Why are half these people so terrible. Someone please kill the sister fucker. Jesus Yami you might need to see a doctor. Goddamn girl you're intolerable. Oh does everyone in town hate him too? This is fucking unbearable. Oh jesus just shoot me. Maybe I'll luck out and they'll kill each other. Oh lord here goes Asta's nun fetish. Don't let him take that child out on a date. That bird continues to be the best character. Cooking's not everything but it's better than anything this bitch brings to the table. At this point Ill take any plot that isn't just painful romantic bumbling. Why has no one stabbed sister fucker to death yet. Naruto- Wow what a shock another illusion. I don't think I'm lucky enough to see Sasuke die here. Ha, she got kicked in the vag. I can agree with that, Sasuke was a mistake. That giant skeleton continues to be way too cool for him. Well at least this shit makes sense to someone. Uh dude you got a face on your arm. Joke's on you, Naruto is way too stupid for anyone to control. You'd think he'd just kill this girl already before she figured his shit out. Oh that is some overpowered bullshit right there. What in the fuck is that supposed to be it looks like King Kong fucked an elephant. WIND TUNNEL. I still haven't quite given up hope that they'll kill each other. And I'm sure that those four minutes will last half an hour next week. You stupid assholes. And then they had lightsabers.

Guys, I don't think Avdol's gonna get better and come back to save the day this time.

Hero- All Might is a beautiful buff god and I love him. Fuck you, Bakugo. Aizawa gives no shits. I also want to get my hands on All Might. Everyone is class rep. Iida is clearly the best option. Aww yay Deku won. I like how teach keeps his sleeping bag behind the desk. He’s right, I’d love to fuck All Might but I would absolutely die. Okay that’s cool as shit. That is way too many sidekicks. Goddamn reporters. I do want All Might’s inches. Girl just float. Iida’s a good dude. Best teacher. HI HOT LADY. Ohhh that can’t be good. HI MT LADY. YESSSS MY BOYFRIEND. God that suit is awful. Oh nooooo he’s losing his powers. Is it even possible for him to not smile in that form? God I love my boyfriend. RIBBIT. His costume exploded last week. I love this pink girl. Bakugo’s a piece of shit and I like that everyone hates him. Welcome to fake Disney. Oh no he broke. I like space lady. Heee look at her fangirl. Welcome to murder town, kids. What the FUCK is this. Ohhhh noooooo. Use Bakugo as a shield, not even for safety just because he’s a bag of dicks. FLCL- I got a bad feel about this. Hidome’s had enough of these shenanigans. Enough talk just punch her. Did she summon the gate from FMA? Rent-a-Loli’s got a log of shit in that bag. IT”S HUGE. What in the fuck? Captain Dodo noooo. Well that’s depressing. Goddamn mochi ruins everything. Take this tacky plastic pumpkin. Better get that plant back. Canti! Shut up fat Caesar. I love her mom. Was that supposed to happen? Be nice to your mom she’s a good lady. Awwwww mommy. This is sweet. MOM NO. Good luck with that, kiddo. CANTI”S BACK! That is a lot of forehead power. And now she’s a mecha. Pedal faster, fat boy. And then the loli was Fern Gully. Canti for MVP. I do love a good guitar fight. The obvious answer here is threeway. And then barfing. Sorry Haruko I don’t think he likes you back. I don’t know what’s going on. Oh hey Jinyu. Oh thank god her mom’s fine. Congratulations you won a naked loli. She’s right I’m an adult and I don’t learn shit. Eyebrows, huh? Awww. That sure was a thing alright. PTE- Oh christ are we in Black Clover. That’s probably the best thing you could summon in this situation. Yeah I agree, you suck! Has anyone seen the fourth wall? They have a point, wombats are adorable. She does have some sweet ski jump moves. This music video is better than all the ones they’ve shown during the block. Okay that bird thing cracked me up. I think that little one broke. Oh god the song is even better with the dudes. Jojo- I still can’t believe I had to watch my husband die twice. Fuck you ice boy. Really, this is Joseph’s fault for not teaching Avdol any hamon when he had the chance. I’m sad too but denial isn’t gonna help us here. Kill him and avenge my husband, Frenchy. Meanwhile, these idiots wander around lost. Protect Iggy at all costs. I also wish he hadn’t gave his life to save your moron ass. Oh fuck no, You’re not allowed to die until you kill that pantsless bastard. Please don’t kill my dog. Aw fuck there goes your foot. Don’t be such a baby, toes grow back. Oh hi Dio. Good job Iggy distract him with gay thoughts. Aw crap. IGGY NO. Jesus Christ this is horrifying. I”D LIKE TO GET OFF THIS RIDE NOW. What the fuck this is just excessive. Please god just die already. Surprisingly smart move from Polnareff. Oh what the fuck why didn’t that kill him. You didn’t need those fingers anyway. This is not going well. Mother fuck I even feel bad for Polnareff now. Please save Iggy. You could just try scooting over where he already passed. I’m gonna go with “life is a bitch” here. Now is not the time to make me laugh, narrator. Iggy no save your strength. And now I’m crying. Avdol didn’t die for this. Hunter- Please save my son I can’t lose my husband and my dog and my kid so soon. You better be on our side, chameleon. That is overpowered as shit. Don’t worry you scaly bastard I’m suspicious enough for him. Tragic backstory ahoy. Ohhh he’s here to avenge Professor Penguin, I can get behind that. Well this is depressing. Oh fuck you stay away from my child you weirdo. Yep this guy’s ability is overpowered as shit. Alright the plan here is to sneak in and punch him right in the balls as hard as you can. No hard feelings about killing his partners. Sorry kiddo, Killua’s a little busy right now bleeding to death. Oh wait it’s Knuckle. Hi Knuckle please take off your shirt. Kick some ass, old man. Sorry he’s a little busy getting some back alley surgery. Meanwhile dick Mewtwo continues to be a bastard. I can’t believe we’re all afraid of some green douce who sits around playing board games. Okay “rest like you mean it” is a pretty good motto in life. Just throw Monopoly at him and you can distract him for a solid 14 hours. Oh this little blind girl is so screwed here. Clover- Is this really just a recap because I’d like to go back to crying over Jojo. Fuck off with your nun fetish I don’t have the energy for this. Noooope not goddamn doing this tonight. Naruto- The best thing you can do for Sasuke is just take him out behind the barn and shoot him. That old bastard can sure run fast. Maybe I’ll luck out and they’ll kill each other. No let her try to kill Sasuke I wanna see how badly she fails. I do like the dog squad. Waste that time with flashbacks, show. Is he having a heart attack because that’d be great. That giant skeleton looks way too cool for Sasuke. Wow that dude just exploded. Look with your special eyes! It’s never the real person the first fourteen times you attack. At least use this bitch as a human shield if you don’t have the decency to die here. Don’t drag that cool eagle into this fight. At least that guy’s creepy, disgusting arm is gone. Oh what a shock he’s perfectly fine. Oh what the shit isn’t that guy dead.

what in the shit?

Please tell me Iggy uses him as a shield to escape.

He looks even younger than he did in SDC. ...Of course he looked like a damn 30 year old man in SDC, so carry on.

WOOOOOOOOOOOO

I want to feed him meat until he gains back a solid 150 pounds and stops looking like a tired scarecrow. And then, y'know, the banging.

That was waaaaay back in the beginning around like, 75 episodes in.

Nami's adopted mother was a marine who retired to raise her and her sister full-time. That particular panel is Nami leaving a ship full of sick children that they'd just rescued in the care of a marine woman who promised they'd get proper care. As for Luffy:

I can't believe out of every single character in this show, I immediately picked the one who dies goddamn twice. THIS IS BULLSHIT.

This is way too many cartoons for one night. Hero- Bakugo continues to be the fucking worst. Thanks, medicbots. I love Dad Might. Good job glasses boy. I like nerd girl here. Meanwhile Bakugo has a nervous breakdown over how shitty he is. I'm sure invisible girl is adorable. This boy's power is just Parasyte. Oh cool, ice powers. You're gonna have to pee your feet free. I volunteer to keep All Might warm. Icy Hot has a great quirk. What the hell is this kid's power, duct-tape elbows? I like that the animal quirks are on the same team. Nerd girl is gonna murder bubble boy. And then David Bowie showed up with Acid Girl. DAD MIGHT IS THE BEST. Bakugo is definitely gonna end up as a villain. Poor Small Might. Nurse Pinako lays the smackdown on him. I don't mind that he shrinks down a bunch but I wish he wasn't so emaciated, he just constantly looks like he's about to keel over. Aww Deku I'm so proud of you. Awwww they all love him. I like pink girl. Iida's gonna have a damn aneurysm. Fuck off, Bakugo. Don't tell him about your powers he doesn't deserve to know. I'm gonna throw this little douche down a flight of stairs. Yes yes you suck and you should feel bad. Goddamn I love him. I'm gonna throw this fucker off a building. I enjoy the girls running commentary. Ohhh that's an ominous scene there. If you assholes touch my boyfriend I will kill you myself. FLCL- Oh boy time for another fucked up dream. I couldn't tell you whats going on but it is pretty. Uhh Haruko I don't think you looked like that yesterday. Someone please rescue Canti. How dare you insult Canti like that. Wow that theme park sounds desperate. That's a cute story that is definitely true and not a complete lie. I am very concerned about whatever's about to pop out of her uterus. Wow kid you really suck at guitar. And here's one of our heroes, gallantly trying to beat up a heavily pregnant woman. I sure as shit know nothing here. OHHHH BURN. Hidome broke. Well that's a new one. Well at least most of these kids are happy. What in the hell is going on? Wow what a surprise this was all a shady plot to use them. I like the kiwi. Bird World is a really weird amusement park. Okay well good news is that he's alive, bad news is everything else here. Mom is still adorable and I love her. And now he's a balloon. Bye Ide. Alright, Teenage Sex Land is a weirder amusement park than Bird World. AWWW CANTI DOG. Oh no he ate him. Haruko where the fuck is your fetus? Hey Hidome you okay there? WHELP. PTE- What the hell am I watching? I know this is a fakeout but I hope we get that giant dog in the OP. Oh god they're Dandy and All Might. They had to blur out Totoro. Haa, Pokemon. Oh no they're breaking the fourth wall. This really is anime Tim & Eric. And then we were French, I guess. I think I'm having a stroke. I...have no idea what to feel about this. Jojo- If that stand looked in my mind it would just see a never-ending parade of dicks and titties. YES YES YES YES YES. Man why did they give Star Platinum such a well-defined ass in this arc. Eat shit, gamer guy. I DO I DO I DO I DO. It's not cheating if you don't get caught, your shitty brother taught us that. No shit it's a game to him it's a literal video game. Okay all the YES YES YES is cracking me up. I think your stand is broken, buddy. Hey you leave his hat out of this. I need that as a ringtone.. A video game expert is absolutely not an expert at life, you douche. Oh hey Kakyoin nice of you to join us. HAAAAA, JOSEPH WAS THE CHEATER. Grandpa's great at video games. NO NO NO NO NO. It's both fists, asshole! YES YES OH MY GOD. Oh hey, it's a wall. Meanwhile, this is ominous and sexy. "Cool Ice" my ass, that's goddamn Vanilla Ice. I got a bad feeling about this. Jonathan's body, still doing its best. "Crimson vigor" my ass, just call it a boner. Well hey that's one enemy down. Aw crap he's a vampire now. Avdol just burn the place down now. Oh nooooo that is some ominous dialogue there honey. If worse comes to worst, use Polnareff as a shield. Avdol's giant cock is so cool I love him. Oh, there's a dude in that wall. OH FUCK DON'T READ THAT. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck. WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS BULLSHIT. Oh god it left his arms. Aaaand I'm crying. My husband just got vored to death and I'm gonna have to live with that fact for the rest of my life. I can't believe out of every character in this show, I had to pick the one who dies goddamn twice. Hunter- What's next tonight, you gonna kill shirtless Knuckle in front of me too? GUNTOPUS is fun. Yeah piranhas are a bitch like that. Killua that's not how this works, you gotta bluff your way through a high-stakes poker game to get him to talk. Squids are gross looking, fight me on it. And then shoujo-eyes octopus died. NOT TODAY, YOYO MAGIC. This is a weird friendship. Oh fuck please don't kill my son I already lost my husband. Aw crap there's a button on him. STOP TORTURING MY LOVED ONES. That is a goddamn stand. Man, Old Greg is a real douche here. This is such a weird fucking power. Christ this is a REAL rough night for characters I love. Well at least Gon's alright. I don't trust him. Oh my sweet precious child you're going to die. Don't fuck with Gon. Oh thank god he's okay. Joke's on you, my kid was raised by a family of psychotic assassins who honed his reflexes every day. Aw fuck my kid's stil dying.. Son of a bitch, someone please save my son. Thank you, friendly squidtopus. Clover- This garbage is the absolute last thing I fucking want tonight. I guess whores would help me feel better. No one here has any business talking to women. Okay naked Yami does make me feel a little bit better. That's a mistake, Yam is the only fuckable man in this show. Of course she's tagging along to ruin the mood. God I wish I was drunk for this. Crush you enemies, see them driven before you, etc. If you say the phrase "Wizard King" I'm gonna throw you off the roof. At least he's trying. Tell them what your captain looks like naked. Why did they censor the wounds, I want to see him injured. Why did you dress up as a fucking barmaid? Aw crap it's this douchebag. If I'm not having fun at least nobody else is either. Oh no bitches, get better standards. Don't scream at her, dumbass. I don't want to be here either. Fucking christ how is this working. I don't want to watch this. Why does every bitch want this obnoxious twat? Give up on the nun already for fuck's sake. Naruto- Gee these two definitely aren't the ninjas you're looking for. Thanks for telling him the obvious thing that he's too dumb to realize, Sai. Nobody likes Sasuke. No she's definitely a fool and also a bitch. Oh there is no way that's gonna work but please god let me watch her fail to kill Sasuke. I think you're kinda way too late to save the little bastard from the whole path of evil thing. Hey there, decent people. Aw fuck it's this orange douche haven't I suffered enough tonight? MIIIIND TAKER. Why is everyone in this show dumb as a sack of rocks? How DARE you show me someone losing an arm after the night I've had. Finally a decent fucking Hokage. Sasuke continues to be the goddamn worst. I hate this girl so much. What the hell is your arm? This has been a rough day for me but maybe they'll make up for it by killing each other.

Avdol just got vored to death and I have to live with that fact for the rest of my life.

MOTHERFUCKER, THIS IS BULLSHIT. I'M A WIDOW AGAIN.

My dude I have literally never looked at another girl and thought something like "She's so sexy I wish she was my hot secretary" in any way that wasn't gay as hell.

I wonder if they knew how much singing was in this show before the cast the music skeleton as Dandy.