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EmpressAngel

All Might's Wife
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About EmpressAngel

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    Fire Simp
  • Birthday September 22

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  1. I GET IT. Fena- At least this one isn't my fault. Maybe they'll luck out and Fena really is a witch. It's okay boyfriend, if he dies I'll console you. This crew could sure use an adorable reindeer pirate doctor. He's safe but now has a crippling nicotine addiction. Aw hell he's still a dick. Wait I only have to bring men to their downfall to count as a witch? He will never love me because I doom men with my love. Y'know what I kinda hope I get him killed now. Yeah sure grab the reject bows you edgy emo jackass. DOG. I dunno about that Fena, he kinda turned out to be a real bastard. She has a point, she's not competent enough to be a witch. That was a fast change of heart. Yukimaru is cute but very bland. Awww there she is. Don't worry, he's out banging whores. We all dream of living the One Piece life. Just make out already. I was put on this earth to simp for cartoon dudes. I think that means you're married now. Close enough! Oh she thirsty. Meanwhile, this asshole. Hero- Well that's a cheerful opener. Fuckhands had a single good idea for once in his life. I hate you, Slide n' Go. This guy looks like some alternate version of Aizawa who has his life together and I don't like it. Fucking gamer bro. Hellooooo blue waifu. Giran's having a rough day. The League kinda sucks, guys. Stabby time. Killer Queen has no weaknesses. Jesus christ the blood is a bomb! So hey lady that's all good but are you single. Oh that's gross. Little Toga was an adorable little monster. No, trying to drink a dead bird was not completely normal and they shouldn't accept it. Bomb to the face. Toga's having a bad time. Well that's new. I'm kinda rooting for her here. RIP waifu. You okay there, Fuckhands? Oh that can't be good. Look I'm not proud of myself but I am above all else a fire simp and Dabi's right there. Is that a blue eyes white dragon? Uh guys where's Twice? Twice is a good boy. Oh, that's fucked up. Yashahime- The hell is that, a Thundercat? Eww, this monk is stale. Is the rainbow pearl just a fancy magic 8 ball? Why are you surprised, don't most demons eat humans? Oh hey, Miroku's still aive! Oh hey, Sango's still alive! So are they divorced or what. Miroku looks weird without his normal monk clothes. How did Miroku of all charactes become the most attractive person in this series. Hey Miroku, do you know where anbody's parents are? Betcha wish you'd kept the wind tunnel now. Oh thank god best girl is here now. Blah blah blah daddy issues. Shut the fuck up, Towa. I like that the animators didn't even bother making this thing's mouth move when he talks. Miroku, out! Ah, the ol' Naraku's Miasma Bug ploy. Just let it eat Towa. Oh whart the fuck. Uh, what was that sealing spell? I hate you, dimestore Shippo. Go home and fuck your hot wife, Miroku. Sango hasn't aged a day. Food Wars- Just make cake with buttercream frosting. I hate that these dishes always sound so good. I hate all of you. No you were right, he is a piece of crap loser. It never occurred to me that squids have livers. I agree with the bystanders, butter has no place in sushi. I don't care about this schmuck's tragic backstory. Lady you could have just quit and gone back to your own restaurant. Oh wow, is Soma actually not being a total smug piece of shit for a change? Oh, false alarm he's still a smug jackass. "Kinda-sorta white sauce" sounds awful. GUN. Clover- Are we done yet? Just take her, who gives a shit. Please kill Fetish Gluttony. Thank you, christ. And nothing of value was lost. I'm glad evil Seitz is having fun here. This demon is angry because he's stuck dealing with Asta of all people. I hope that thing takes over his vocal cords. Oh goddammit. Did he just regenerate a hand with a smaller hand on each finger? I'm just happy to see Yami actually getting more than two minutes of fight time in an episode. Kill them all, evil Seitz. THIS IS BULLSHIT. Okay yeah that one was definitely my fault but at least he doesn't have to be in Black Clover anymore. Not even a scratch on goddamn sister fucker. Just chop off his head to be safe. Hi there. This is also my fault. Please kill sister fucker again. I'm entirely okay with the world ending as long as these chucklefucks lose. I straight up cannot understand what that demon is saying. If Yami dies at least he doesn't have to deal with this shit anymore.
  2. Dabi exists mostly just to remind me that I'm still capable of feeling shame, and I just wanna know if his dick is normal or if it looks like a hot dog that fell into a campfire.
  3. Me, begrudgingly accepting that I am above all else a fire simp
  4. I'm on board with this purely because Rengoku is hot and should always have more screentime.
  5. Fena- I constantly forget that the other boy who's not Chip or Dale exists. Everyone's sneaking out. We're gonna have to throw archer boyfriend overboard. I'm guessing he started the archery thing to get laid. FRIENDSHIP. Oh good, he's gonna be less of a dick now. I was half-expecting her mom to secretly be Joan of Arc. Are you her brother or not you handsome, shady fuck? Strike that, did you fuck her mom? Man I really hope he's not secretly her birth father or something. I do not think this will go well for the wenches. That's a big cannon. Stop blowin' holes in me ship! Wow, shocking how her plan of "get pissed off and charge head-first at the heavily armed navy boat" didn't go well. Oh thank god, that's just some other dead lady and not the one he likes. He learned how to control his fear but gave up a solid 90% of his personality in exchange. Time for some PTSD. Fena broke. Say his name three times and he just pops out of the ocean like some kind of samurai Beetlejuice. Not my fault this time. Archer boyfriend, not being a dick! I sure hope one of you is a secret pirate doctor. Hero- Fun story, the anime left out a scene where the League of Villains beats the shit out of the anti-mutant KKK and stole their hideout. Everyone's disappointed in Fuckhands. I don't trust that doctor. Aw hell am I gonna feel sorry for the crusty incel by the end of this? Yeah Shigaraki sucks but really, the poor kid never had a chance. OH NO THERE WAS A DOG. You edgy son of a bitch. It's actually kind of nice that his friends get a free pass to do what they want. Johnny's looking rough. I like that Toga's totally fine with murder but draws the line at shoplifting a coat. Whelp, sucks for this guy. It's fine, fingers grow back. Helloooo blue waifu. Twice is a good boy. I refuse to fear some crusty bastard who uses game lingo in everyday talk. That's a genuinely good plan and I'm surprised he thought of it. Yashahime- Oh what the hell now. Dance for it, hideous stripper demon. Kirara deserves a better series. Reminder that Towa sucks. It's okay Moroha honey you tried. Isn't one of them supposed to have immunity to poison mist or something? Just die already! Go with the endless bounty. Oh right, half-demon moon thing. Go away Myoga! So does Moroha not have enough demon blood to transform? Wait what the hell do you mean it didn't happen in the other world? That doesn't make any sense! It's the same world just the future, it's the same goddamn moon! Why doesn't Setsuna go into human mode? Oh good, the randos are here with their catapults. When in doubt, set shit on fire. Why didn't they just put the magic tags inside the cave? And now they're statues. That bullshit magic butterfly stealing her dreams absolutely does not explain why she doesn't go into human mode. That sure was a quick night. Moroha's never gonna get her money. Food Wars- I fucking hate you, Megumi. FUCK YEAH, SHE LOST. Your character is bad and you should feel bad! Everyone stop praising her, she lost. Yes, cry over your failure. I could go for some pizza. "Loook at his incrediblly thick meat" is definitely a sentence I've said at least once before. This guy still sounds like a nerd who gets shoved in a locker. Megumi already lost, I don't care what happens to the rest of these schmucks. I feel like the judges should understand how that works and take that into account. Could these fuckers not just eat some crackers until the taste wears off? Or just throw in some stupid one-upping bullshit like always, that works too I guess. It's true, the more cheese to slap on that pizza the better. Clover- Wow, who'd have guessed that wouldn't work. I hope the demons win and murder everyone. RIP big titty sea witch lesbian. You can just go ahead and kill Noelle. I hate Fetish Gluttony the most here. You suck, Noelle. Goddammit she did something. Meanwhile, a fight I actually give two shits about. Just whip your dicks out and measure them already. Yami, still giving absolutely zero shits. Fight for my love, boys. Ohhhh Yami's pissed and I'm into this. RIP evil Seitz, you were a real one. I think he's even hornier for this than I am. Hey, I can't kill this one! Oh, I can't fuck that. Asta, sucking and failing. Use Asta as a meatshield.
  6. Fena- Is my boyfriend okay? Oh hey, maybe the hot navy dude isn't totally evil. So is he her long lost brother or not. Meanwhile, they're going to die in the cave. I'm totally fine with blowing up Chp and Dale here. So was that other guy watching the ship just doing nothing at all while Fena was being kidnapped? Dude you look just like that description. Well one of them is my boyfriend and that's all I need to know. Oh yeah this story is totes legit. Dammit boyfriend don't be an asshole. Wait this whole time we've just been after this fancy sword? You're a dick, navy dude. Goddammit boyfriend! Big deal she's a witch, my love gets men killed, we've all got some weird habits. Aww, he's actually likable in simp mode. I still can't tell if that navy kid is a boy or a girl. Well that sure sounds ominous. Sweet, they looted her. Oh, I guess he's a boy. You're twice his size just pick him up and move him. YEET. Are there literally no other guards on this military ship? Don't shoot my waifu. I'm surprised he didn't just shoot my waifu. Sooo you gonna explain anything, navy dude? Why do you have that. Hero- Date me garbage dilf you've got so much room in your house now. Calm down Iida. The plushie! MINA KNOWS WHAT'S UP. It's exactly what she thinks don't lie to yourself. And then Deku died. God I love All Might. Hey look, it's time for someone else to have some emotional trauma. Hi Granpa. Hey there, fancy fog man. Ohhh this is gonna hurt me isn't it. Even baby-faced school kid Aizawa looks exhausted. Oh no, this kid was adorable. I'm already crying! Mic needs a hug. Mist guy didn't seem too concerned watching Aizawa get his face pounded in. This is depressing. He's right, playing babysitter for the crusty incel sounds like the worst fucking job. I'd like to get off this ride now please. Aizawa nees a hug right goddamn now. Oh no that's where he got his goggles. Oh hey, more students. Awwww he's secretly a sweetheart. THIS HURTS ME AND I DON'T LIKE IT. Even Aizawa is crying! He's not looking well. Booo, it didn't work. OH SHIT. For the love of god give these men a hug. I hope they can fix him one day. Oh no you get the hell out of here with yoru dramatic opera music. Console me, Hawks. Uhhh you okay there, Fuckhands? Fun story, the kitten's name is Sushi and Midnight adopted him after she graduated. Yashahime- Fuck yeah, pancakes! Moroha is by far the best part of this show. That's not a normal pond. Oh hey Kohaku and Sango's kid whose name I'll never remember. Oh yeah this'll go well for you, random child. Nobody ever liked you, Myoga! I hate you, discount Shippo. Nobody knows what those words mean because you're hundreds of years in the past. Goddammit was the magic pond sage Kikyo. Kinda rooting for the snake monster here. Great job you made the annoying kids cry. To be fair, he probably shouldn't have sat around the evil murder pond. I'm with Moroha, cleaning sucks. That don't look like no snake to me. Fuck, miasma! Wow that's ugly. "The pond itself is also a demon!" is unreasonably funny to me. It's okay Moroha you tried. I don't know enough about demon genetics to refute this. Blah blah blah teamwork sibling bond whatever. I still don't know what the point of the magic eye pearls is. Careful there, Setsuna almost had a fraction of a personality for a second there. Food Wars- I fucking hate Megumi. I want her to lose and cry. It's not just the catgirl loli, I also look down on Megumi. I have no memory of this guy. I can appreciate someone screaming at Megumi for her absolute incompetence. Okay "Quit relying on others you hillbilly trash!" genuinely made me smile. Meanwhile if anyone enters the kitchen while I'm cooking I fly into an unstoppable rage until they leave. Fuck,, miasma! Bitch host broke. I'm definitely rooting for catgirl loli here. Suck and fail, Megumi. Oh come on. This is bullshit. Clover- Date me, evil Seitz. The fact that none of these dimwits has died is a fucking tragedy. The spy is totally not right there. I feel like I'm also going to hate this guy. I'm rooting for the eviil eyepatch girl. That tongue guy makes me real uncomfortable. Thank you, eyepatch lesbian. I need an adult. Somebody on the good side die here please. That guy's simp magic cannot be stopped. I hate all of you. Fuck yeah, end the world and kill them all. Why did her tits get bigger when she went into mermaid form? Kill them, crazy eyepatch lady. You think she remembers everyone she killed, you dumbass? Noelle, still the fucking worst. I don't care, show. Well after that flashback she's definitely going to die for her friends. At least this nutjob's having fun. Oh right, bird girl's here. I like that nobody gives a shit what bird girl's name really is. Yeah I'm sure this'll go off without a hitch.
  7. We already got that with Alita but people just don't goddamn want to watch it for whatever stupid reasons they have.
  8. No amount of whores will make up for how they hurt me with that movie.
  9. Doing some research as I wait outside divorce court to console a depressed Endeavor over the marriage he ruined: Fena- Is he a Disney princess now? Your brother's hotter than you. Goddamn witches. I hope Fena's hair grows out soon to look less like a choppy mess she cut in the dark. Shut up, twins. Oh hey, her hair looks better already. Oh hey, it's the whores again. Kinda rooting for eyepatch lady here. The nail extractor is his boot. Watch out for Balrogs in that mine. Get that skull off your face before you get cursed. I sure hope she's not accidentally leading us right into a death trap. I think Fena's possessed, y'all. No shit he's in love with her. The Fuck Sherpa knows. You just gotta say the right word in elf language and that thing'll pop open. Well that was easy. Sweet magic fire. More funky glass stuff. Well, that's new. Probably not a good idea to just wander off alone like that but go for it. Now time for some grave robbing. And then Fena got kidnapped because of course she did. Okay I guess we're after gold now. It's fine, they've only got a 25% chance of guessing the right direction. Oh yeah, there's definitely no way out of this place they're totally doomed. Fena it's time for you to learn how to punch some bitches in the tits. Mary's definitely gonna betray the other whores for archer's dick eventually, calling it now. Hero- Natsuo's FRONT BACK shirt still cracks me the hell up. Mmm, tasty inferiority complex. Oh this guy is thirsty. Hey, we finally found somebody who's got an unhealthier obsession with Endeavor than I do! Well this is a depressing subject. I like Natsuo and I approve of him not forgiving his shit dad. The angriest tofu request. Well, that can't be good. I like the driver. Dude's really starting to infringe on my brand here. God what a fucking mood. Please save this cute sad boy. Aww, he's completely useless on saving his son because he cares. I have said way too many things way too similar to this guy's dialogue. FUCK YEAH, KIDS. HUGGING! Bakugo hates hugs. That's also how I feel when the ridiculously hot fire daddy doesn't just destroy me. Not now, Bakugo! The hell did you do to that dead kid? I like all the people just honking at them in the middle of the street. Natsuo is a good boy. I'm glad that he still doesn't forgive him. God this character development is delicious. That is a bizarrely specific power. I'm fully ready to have Garbage Dilf destroy us all. Please tell me he went with KING EXPLOSION MURDER. I love how Hawks being thirsty as fuck for Endeavor is just canon. Sooo when's your meeting with divorce court scheduled? Yashahime- Aw shit we're in Alien now. I don't like this. I hate you, discount Shippo. Sweet, free steak! I prefer Dr Stone's version of silver and gold bros. Just let them kill each other and do your job for you. Surely this will end well. Moroha is still best girl. Maybe I'll luck out and they'll kill each other while they're brainwashed. Whelp, y'all done fucked up. Did they ever explain what the point of those rainbow pearls even is? Snake titties. Betrayed by the snake titties. Yeah sure this is some kind of emotional bonding moment between siblings, whatever. Setsuna who the FUCK do you think it was back then. How did you miss that your knife's on fire? Maybe a meteor will crash down and take them all out before Moroha gets there. Oh no, it's so sad that these random snakes dudes who I have no attachment to are suffering. And nothing of value was lost. Moroha is suffering. Food Wars- I hate everyone. If Megumi wins I'm flipping a table. Who the fuck is Kuga. I've already lost track of what round this is and what their ingredients are. Don't worry I'm sure Soma will magically pull a win out of his ass with some random technique that nobody expects. I hope they all get food poisoning. Just break their hands with a lead pipe, that'll take 'em out. This catgirl is annoying. She's like three feet tall just beat her ass and take the IDs back. BUTTER. I hope Megumi loses and cries. Fucking hell could you give her an easier ingredient to make a good dessert out of? My trick for apple pie is to mix brown sugar and cinnamon into the crust so you get extra flavor in every bite. Clover- How will this show leave me disappointed and unsatisfied tonight? Sister fucker somehow not dying is the biggest crock of shit. You don't need them I'm volunteering my hatred for your personal use! These two sniping at each other is definitely doing this for me. Again, just an untapped fountain of hate right here you can use to kill your enemies. I'm also trying to get Yami for my own personal use. I like this plan and I hope he succeeds. This show doesn't deserve Charmy. I'm definitely rooting for this evil hot bitch. That is one angry sheep. Nevermind, she's awful. I forgot she's some kind of weird gnome hybrid. Isn't this like, the second hot beauty-obsessed bitch that charmy's fought? Oh right, the worst fire sibling is here. Call yoru better siblings, kid. You suck, kid! If you lose this fight your sister is going to march into hell and murder you again. Oh what the hell is this. Noelle, still a massive bitch for no reason. Oh this guy's disgusting. Kill them, evil lady. Will we ever get more than three minutes of Yami fighting in an episode?
  10. Catch me reading this as I wait outside divorce court to console Endeavor over the marriage he ruined.
  11. Hey look, there's finally somebody who's got an unhealthier obsession with Endeavor than I do!
  12. Counter-theory: The knee-jerk live action haters are a flock of insufferable crybabies that will jump at basically any excuse to complain about their precious cartoons being sullied.
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