To think only ten years ago he was best known for interrupting acceptance speeches to shill for Beyonce.
VENTO AUREO - Two dead people alive and Fugo's still part of the group... this is a flashback, isn't it? "Do cannibals have the right idea, eating all that human flesh?" We now return you to the death of Diavolo, already in progress. I just realized GW Requiem has a vagina on its forehead, at least that's how it looks. All right, another full opening! Now with an extra-special helping of GW Requiem. 😎 His body belongs to the Tiber now. "Which way did he go!?" "Down." Huh, guess he hung on after all. They'll never catch him in the sewers! KNIFED. Oh shit, it's one of those nomadic Italian leprechauns. Diavolo's a weird strawberry with legs. Bleeding your own blood is a terrifying feeling, isn't it? And then he was at the morgue. So is this happening some time after he got killed, or... what, exactly? Okay, so apparently he can feel his own autopsy going on, or something. I didn't know "hesitation wounds" were a thing. Huh, so it was the Tiber this whole time, just as my geographical knowledge suggested. DIAVOLO WATCH OUT. In other words, he's trapped within an infinite death loop. The most embarrassing death of all: death by loli. Hate to break it to ya, Mista, but he's already ascended. 👼 SHIT COUNT, ACT 1: 4. Huh, so that's the context of that reaction image. Bucciarati... (and also Abbacchio and Narancia...) R.I.P., guys. T_T7 BAAAAAAAAAALD. So what you're saying is... we should eat vegans. Ah, so this is all the way back during the first episode, then. He hit his head, just not in the way you'd expect. He lost his daughter... to drugs. "Let me tell you how it will be..." Once you're in, there's no pulling out. The boyfriend's lucky the father didn't use those gardening shears on his genitals. OH MY GOD A GIANT ROCK. Bruno's face says, "holy shit that's a lotta money". Who knows, it could've actually been suicide. The mafia's a lot more complex than that. You were a good man, Bucciarati. OH MY GOD THE GIANT ROCK. Come now, Mista, this isn't a CLAMP doujin. How does one go about killing a rock? "You're allowed to shoot him in the spine, but not to the point of bleeding out." OH MY GOD MORE GIANT ROCKS. SHIT COUNT, ACT 2: 3. Sitting on a park bench, eyeing Mista with bad intent. GIANT ROCKS, GIANT ROCKS EVERYWHERE. My dad came in to brush the cat and his first thought upon seeing Mista was "Spiderman". Fugo's just gonna sit here and get used to not hanging out with the others. It must be the pattern on his outfit that's making him think he's Spiderman. HOW DARE YOU HURT MY GIANT ROCK. And then Bucciarati was Kars.
It's funny how I remember more of Bruno when it was being released in theaters than I do Borat when it was being released in theaters.
ASS CLASS - This is the greatest dubbed song I've ever heard. Sweet, it's a sniper episode. Koro-sensei only gets motion sick when the speed is out of his control, that's my theory and I'm sticking to it. Fuck yeah, bridges! (Even though I'm more of a roadways guy.) "If that wasn't a headshot, then I'll be a monkey's... DICK!" Japan really loves hyping up their national foods, I've noticed. At this place, they film period dramas. Wait, so the actors are in on this too? At least, that's what he's making it sound like... He's part of the show now. "Gah, I hate actors! Especially the ones that only do voices!" REPLY TO ANGEL: "He's not even using the special bullets, of course he's failing." An earlier shot actually showed some anti-Koro BBs embedded in the shell of the rounds he was to be using; it was quick enough to be overlooked, so I understand the ignorance. No one wanted to hang out with the fat girl, so she's stuck with Team Actually Deserves the Hate They Get from Main Campus. You should probably get those secretions checked out. What the hell is that wacky Westminster Chimes ringtone? Considering he claims not to be an alien, "factory-made" might actually be accurate. Oh, so all this is happening parallel to last episode. It's official, last night was "lower decks night" on Toonami. Sniping someone's all fun and games until your target refuses to die. How thoughtful of you, Koro-sensei. I don't blame him for blowing on that tofu so much, I struggle with super-hot fluids too. Take that, Main Campus! You're a cool guy, Red Eye. Bullhorn. This Sunday, Spear and Fang run into a group of horned ape women... with sexy results. Of what I've played of Yakuza 0 so far, the only time-waster I've done was messing around in the Sega Arcade; played two rounds of Space Harrier and won two plushies from the crane game machine. It's tough being Karasuma. Yeah, well Main Campus is a bunch of ugly losers who get their rocks off on still images of suffering third-world peoples, so you're all better off. Ass Class sez, girls can be peeping toms too. MACHO. Koro-sensei makes his own bubble bath. And then he escaped, and with the bathwater too. Ah yes, the prized list of best girls. Ponytail girl is a respectable #2. BITCH MOVE. Karma likes Okuda because she reminds him of this chick. OH SHIT, KORO-SENSEI KNOWS. As I thought, the girls are talking about the boys. Everyone wants to bang Karasuma. I think I might start casually shipping Karma/Okuda after this. This one's for the tickling fetishists. Beer me, Hellabitch! Trashy little ginger. So many traditionally Japanese snack foods... I count mochi, dango, and konpeitou in there. ANIME CLICHE #177: Beautiful mature-looking women are always younger than they appear. Hellabitch has honestly grown on me. Huh, Koro-sensei's sit-in turned out more fair than I thought. Though with the same results. BATTLE ROYALE, FUCK YEAH. Hmm, so he's capable of speaking without moving his mouth... Oh, we Koro-sensei backstory now? You have a point, the weeks go by way too fast, even though life seems as long as it's always been. Back to hating on main campus like the devils they assume we are. SURPRISE POST-CREDITS SEQUENCE, GO! I'd be for the missile as it would destroy main campus, but against it because it would destroy E Class. Ooh, are these some mysterious transfer students I'm hearing of? And one of them's Deep Blue, but a cute girl? Sure, I guess.
BLACK CLOVER - The most brutal filler episode of all: NOTHING!
SHIPPUDEN - Okay, maybe another episode of Yota being annoying is more brutal than even that. But at least we're lucky the Yota Naruto's fighting is the least annoying of the bunch. I wouldn't put it past Kabuto to revive multiples of the same person as a sort of experiment, though three of the four being White Zetsus does make more sense. That's our Naruto, shouldering everyone's burdens so they don't have to. Time to stab some children. Since this is filler that has no real bearing on anything, I guess I can forgive Naruto having acquaintances pre-series start this time. It's a nice day... for inexplicable weather patterns. I CAN'T READ CIRCLE. Okay, now I'm convinced he's some type of experiment of Orochimaru's. And that was before the giant snake vision. Oh no, Naruto's painting up the Third's likeness in blackface! You better get used to his graffiti tactics, 'cause there's a lot more of 'em comin'. "You see anything?" "Don't ask me, I'm not from a family with visual kekkei genkai." Even as an academy student, Shikamaru was easily the most competent of the rookie 9. "Bright lights, my one weakness!" ANBU are jerks. He's the first friend, but their time together was so short, it's hardly ever talked about. To the border wall! But first, the river. It really says a lot about young Naruto's physical state if he was able to tread water longer than either Shikamaru or Choji. Welp, he's drowned. Bad news, son... you're hand-pregnant! Do any of these kids know CPR? Probably not. Okay, so it's sounding like something CPR can't fix. And then they all had a case of explosive amnesia. To think, this series could've been way different had they actually remembered Yota. Huh, so it was then that he started rocking the goggles that Kishimoto would've had him wear all the time, were they not so hard to draw consistently. He can't kill him, so he's hoping for the "death through finding peace" option instead. This mental link is for the Society of No Kabutos. WHAT A TWEEST. Things were good, but then the pandemic happened. As I thought, it was Orochimaru all along. To think there was a time when this sort of thing actually freaked Kabuto out. Wait, so he was still alive, and just chilling out at one of Orochimaru's many hideouts until Kabuto had a use for him? Akamaru grew up the most, relatively speaking. Dammit Naruto, war's neither the place nor the time to catch up on lost fun. And then he became a human snowman. I'm sure this was moving to someone. Maybe a little part of me if I wasn't as bothered with Yota's childish personality early on as I was.