EmpressAngel

I'm not proud of myself but damn if you don't have a point.

This is the only good AMV that exists.

Important: Look at these dads.

Nope.

"SWALLOW SOME OF MY DNA"

Waiting for that "SWALLOW MY DNA" line again like

I feel like I just got so much dumber for having to read the word "animegate". Like, I'm pretty sure I don't know math anymore.

I mean, the show's geared towards hormonal teenage boys. Of course there's gonna be more tits than manservice, but it's not like the dudes get nothing.

Hero- Simmer down there, Icy Hot. Aizawa is suffering and I'm enjoying it. Was that a clown boy? I'm proud of you, Hardboy. And then Hardboy 2. His parents named him Tetsu^4, they must have hated him. I love all these children and will adopt all of them except Bakugo. Yeah that near-death experience really taught them some valuable lessons. Do Iida's pipes retract or can he just never wear regular pants? I wonder how the invisible girl is getting through ths. That's a smart idea, Deku. BOOB CANNON. This seems ridiculiously simple for Uraraka. Goggles. She's got Attack on Titan toys. What's the deal with tired boy here. Haaaa he's Frozone. Iida is great. Random dog man. SHOW ME THE FIRE DILF ALREADY. Oh, Bakugo can't explode. Deku I think it's safe to drop the shield. Uhhh what just happened. LOOK AT HIM GO. I love my tiny buff son and I'm so proud of him. Aw fuck that landing's gonna kill him. Present Mic is having a great day. I mean getting third place would still be crazy impressive. THIS IS AWESOME. Joke's on you, Aizawa doesn't teach he just sleeps. Awww his mom. Go away, Fuckhands. I can't stop smiling. Shut up nerds he's adorable. NOISE NOISE NOISE. Bakugo's about to have a fucking stroke. Get it, Deku. Mineta you fucking loser. My kids did so good. Oh no poor sparkle boy. God, I'm gay. They're carrying All Might. Oh crap Deku you're screwed. This show is so good I don't even mind that All Might didn't go into big mode. Titan- I like that Levi faces giant cannibal monsters with blistering indifference and yet Cowboy Kenny here is what really disturbs him. Okay this shot is genuinely awesome. The Hol Horse is strong in this one. No no the booze, I need that for Black Clover! Levi is definitely the best part of this show. Meanwhile, the others do nothing. Friendly bar wench, helping the bartender. Ouuuch right in the nipple. Levi doesn't fuck around. Jean you pansy. Whelp somebody's dead. Fuck off, rich dudes. Did Erwin lose an arm and I just forgot about it? Armin needs a hug. Damn Armin grew a pair this season. Goddammit Eren could you stop getting captured for one damn week. I agree Jean, you suck. Oh christ Armin broke. Surprisingly good motivational speaker Levi here. Oh no, plundering. I was not expecting this fat guy to be a decent dude. Eren sucks though, just let him get eaten. I enjoy Hange a lot. Somebody please get Armin some fucking therapy. You bastard leave that whore alone. Yeah that's nice and all but do you believe in keeping your goddamn kneecaps? The worst torture of all, your coworker saying mean things behind your back. Well that was easy. I still refuse to be afraid of Cowoby Kenny here. Wait isn't that Mikasa's name? Yeah this family reunion is gonna go just great. PTE- Hand puns, go! BUSTIN MAKES ME FEEL GOOD. Gon would be proud of this arm wrestling. The car. THE COOLEST THING EVER. Sanji would be proud of that tuna. Swole mayor coming through. Poor rabbit. That is the only correct way to enjoy latte art. Aww, hugging. Not a hug. 1000 people out of 10, that math sounds about right. I bet the French bits are fun if you actually know what they're saying. I don't think the narrator sounded like this before. This turns out to be a great night for cowboy characters. I want this man to narrate every show from now on. Good job, Mayor Hol Horse. FRIENDSHIP SLAP. Jojo- I love josuke's hot mom. Jesus that's fucked up. What IS it with this show and dogs. This OP is great it's like Jotaro's surrounded by a boyband. Hello there cute chef in the OP, you're going to die. Awwww hot mom still loves Joseph. Oh hell no you stay out of that milf. I like that she does't even react to getting punched through the chest. OH THAT'S A BASEBALL! You stay away from the nice grandpa you asshole! Well that's some disturbing news. GRANDPA NOOO. Jotaro you know what to do, restart his heart. Oh noooo. Josuke's gonna need a hug. Jotaro what are you talking about I literally saw you restart Joseph's heart two weeks ago. Protect that milf with your life. I volunteer to console the hot mom. Kick his ass, Jojos. Aw shit he can't heal himself. Aw shit it's rain. ORA. Boy jumps like Donky Kong. Cover your mouths! You dick, you kill his grandpa AND wreck his roof. Star Platinum is having none of this shit today. I like that Star changed his color scheme to white so he matches Jotaro's new outfit. Whelp he's dead, show's over. He swallowed a damn glove. I hope he broke some bones in that fall. Punch his jaw off, Josuke. And then he was a rock. Damn, Josuke really does not fuck aroun with villains. OH MAN I FUCKING LOVE THIS SONG. Hunter- FUCKING BIRDS. I love my kids. I hope Palm's not dead. What old job, was your family just ssending you out for murders back then? Oh hey Colt, your weird baby's gotten bigger. Uh guys you might not wanna be chilling on top of a building where everyone can see you. Alright Knuckle time to take your shirt off. You could just stop guarding him and see how things happen. You dramatic gay bastard. Y'all should probably just send out Karma Chameleon since his entire thing is hiding himself. Oh no, you guys should definitely be scared about this. Oh hey, he stopped being a little bitch. Oh dang he looks awful. Turtle Mewtwo learning a lesson in basic decency. Aw shit what's the butterfly douche doing. Whelp they're all drugged up. Wake up Knuckle you need to know things or you'll die. Quick, group hug while everyone's here. Well his douchebag brother jammed a brainwashing needle in his skull, that would probably bum me out too. Stop mentioning Kite you're gonna make me cry. Good luck everybody I hope you don't die. You were born just to give me nightmares, dude. Clover- Why is this show not exclusively about Yami fighting and hating things? Every episode that sister fucker doesn't die is a wasted opportunity. Yami continues to be the single bright spot in this dumpster fire of a series. The fuck? Okay Yami's eulogy there is the first time this show ever made me laugh. Aaaand back to people I hate. They left you behind because you're awful. Oh hey, bird. Sorry nun you're not lucky enough to die your way out of this show. Hurry your shit up, Cap'n Sexy needs a beer. Jesus tapdancing christ, why is sister fucker allowed to exist. Whelp, you're all gonna die and I will miss exactly one of you. I'm already annoyed with these people. Man I hate it when you wear down a gym leader's pokemon and then they use a full restore on it. This entire thing seems pretentous and obnoxious. I continue to enjoy Yami not giving a single fuck. Oh that's just unfair. Aw crap there goes his sword. No don't have them stand back, use them as meatshields. Why does the only decent one have to die? This show isn't worthy of a PLUS ULTRA joke, even at its best. That was a close one, Yami almost gave a shit. Oh hey, something happened. Hey douchebag, thanks I guess. Thank you for pointing out how awful his hair is. Oh hey it's the lesbian. Oh yeah let's trust the guy who's literally named Jack the Ripper. Naruto- That sure is a lot of eyes. Oh my god he's not your friend, Sasuke has literally never liked you. Is this just gonna be another pointless flashback episode because I have so much All Might porn I'd rather be looking at. It's too late for you dumbass, you're already a loser. Oh right, Flytrap Travis is in this show. Has Naruto finally realized that Sasuke is a piece of shit who'll never love him? Well that's creepy. Naruto you stupid bastard I hate you. This entire speech is cringy as shit. The whole thing comes off as a desperate stalker who thinks they can be together if he commits a murder/suicide. To be fair, I also don't respect you at all. Hey Sakura you're right, you are goddamn awful! Sasuke you stupid blind idiot. Sakura you fucking moron. Just kill the fangirl.

OH MAN I FUCKING LOVE THIS SONG.

This movie has HOT YOUNG MIGHT with actual eyes? Ohhh I need to see this.

So you're telling me that not only is there a hot dude with fire powers, but he's a hot DILF with fire powers?

That's just how Jotaro wears hats. His black one did the same thing. Nah, Josuke probably would have died from the stand illness too. Man, that whole speech Suzie had a couple weeks ago about how Joseph had never disappointed her in 50 years together is kinda really sad now that we know he's a whore.

That's not soon enough!

FIRE DILF WHEN? I want him to transfer into class just so he and Aizawa can yell at each other to get some sleep.

Wait, you're telling me this guy is a hot DILF with fire powers? That's even better than a regular hot dude with fire powers! I'd like to hear more. That's how you know he's Joseph's son.

Yes. Actually, these two episodes just make me hate every other second of the show even more, because now I've seen that it could actually be a decent series if it wanted.

Avdol is perfectly fine, he's absent because he's busy taking care of our multiple adorable children shut up just let me dream. Hero- SHOW ME MORE OF THAT FIRE DUDE. That suit looks so sad when he's not buff. Oh Deku, you adorable buzzkill. Explode them, Bakugo. This boy looks even more tired than Aizawa. Well shit, they might get kicked out again. He's so loud. God Bakugo why are you such a bastard. On the bright side, Mineta's probably more likely to get kicked out than Deku. FROG. I love most of these kids so much. Don't make your cute mom worry. RATINGS. I like the All Might masks. Who's Endeavor and which one's his kid? Hiii Mt Lady! Oh hey Icy Hot. Damn kid what crawled up your ass today? LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE. Hi, random kids I don't really care about. HELLOOOO MIDNIGHT. Aw fuck don't let Bakugo speak. Bakugo, confirmed for fucking worst. God I'm gay for Midnight. Good luck kids I believe in you. Aizawa is suffering. Icy Hot name is canon. How'd this dude get people to carry him. Shit even Mineta figured out a workaround. And then Mineta died. ROBOTS. Oh is Icy Hot the pro's kid? Kid I think if you get everyone else killed they won't let you be a hero. MAMA MIDORIA IS SO CUTE. Present Mic would be kinda cute without the weird hairstyle and that dorkass mustache. Titan- I genuinely don't remember anything about last season except for the lesbians. Okay the first OP for this show was definitely the best. I love potato girl. Levi will kill you if you don't clean the house. Hi there, best character. Levi is going to kill them. Glasses girl is also good. Owwww his face. Wait I thought that girl skipped town with the lesbian titan. Just fill the hole, hole filler. No he sucks and should beat himself up. Fuck you, Sasquatch. Fight for your girlfriend. Eren knows that people are never that nice to him. RIP douche. Yeah that's not shady as fuck or anything. I enjoy you, glasses girl. Levi gives zero shits about this. Whelp, you're screwed. IT'S HIGH NOON. That seems suspiciously nice of the king. Great job, you dumb shits. Did they really do the "Jean dresses as Eren" thing again. I'm uncomfortable with this. Uhhh y'all might wanna get in there before Armin gets raped. Mikasa gets to be so cool when Eren's not around. Levi is never very pleased about anything, it's like you don't know him at all. Well that sounds ominous. Girl you really think Levi's capable of mamking jokes? Sorry but I will never feel threatened by someone named Kenny. I hope y'all like IT'S HIGH NOON jokes because this guy is gonna bring a lot of them. PTE- Bacon no that's cannibalism! I continue to love how angry that little orange one is. The lemon. Not the Bamboozle gang! STOP YOUTUBING. It took me a stupidly long time to get the joke about them being bamboo. And then she died. That's how I hope my funeral picture looks. What an ending. Shitty edgelord keychain. Bangs are indeed a bitch to cut. YEEEEEEAHHHH. This music video is still better than most of the ones Toonami interrupts the block for. Trees are so stupid. JYB is definitely the MVP this week. Jojo- Tonight is bacon night I guess. Oh, that's terrifying. Hey there, old Jotaro. I like that he looks younger than he did at 17. BIZARRE friends, you say? Wow this kid is short. Kick their asses, Jotaro. DICKFACE. Well this boy is adorable. TURTLE NO. The series takes a quick break from murdering dogs. Oh hey new Jojo. Ohhh you should not have insulted his hair. Cool stand bro. Yay he saved the turtle. Y'all done fucked up here. I love him already. JOSEPH YOU WHORE. I mean I know he's hot as shit for a grandpa and so I can't blame Josuke's mom, but Joseph should have known better. Beat his ass, Suzi. Awww Josuke you didn't do anything. Josuke inherited the Joestar fangirl summoning powers. This is gonna be a fun fight. Star Platinum doesn't fuck around. Haaaa he has his own ORA. Oh fuck you messed up his hat. Jotaro still hates bitches. "He's kinda scary, but in a hot way" indeed. I'm guessing the evil is whoever's responsible for that severed hand. You guys are gonna miss your first day of school. I think "family drama" is an understatement, Koichi. Thank god he didn't hit your beautiful face. Dang his mom is hot, I can understand Joseph ruining his marriage. Haaa, the cop is her dad. And now shit will hit the fan. Oh well he sounds like a fucking delight. Josuke is such a good kid. Whelp that's a dead body in the woods. AWW SHIT YOU FUCKED UP. And then he turned them into Kakyoin. It's okay they're fine. KNIFE IN THE GUT. Well shit that's a stand alright. Watch out for clowns in that sewer. Oh hell no you stay away from his hot mom. Hunter- Just let this poor kid sleep. Turtle Mewtwo is being surprisingly decent and that concerns me. Calm down you dramatic goddamn bitch. Hi Knuckle I think it's time to take your shirt off. You better not screw us over, Karma Chameleon. Well shit I hope Palm's okay. Guys maybe you should let Gon talk. Fuck you and your endearing cat puns that I can't bring myself to hate. I love this little girl constantly kicking his ass at a board game. Good luck pipe guy I hope you don't die. Oh crap this is where my curse kicks in and punches Knuckle right through the shirtless chest isn't it. KICK HIS ASS, LITTLE GIRL. Oh fuck what's going on. Aw crap is that nen they're gonna eat her. Oh hey she has a name. Dude just spiraled into an existential crisis. Just give him a damn name already. No his top priority is to beat this small child at checkers. Oh my god shut up you whiny bastard. Aw fuck he powered up. Yeah, a simple board game that you can't fucking win, you dumbass. What is with this bird? Oh honey that's so sad let me hug you. Clover- Maybe I'll be lucky enough to get two bearable episodes in a row. It's nice that Cap'n Sexy's fine but I wish Asta died. No let him try I want to watch him die. It's such a weird change of pace to not loathe every second of this show. Why couldn't the entire series just be Yami fighting and giving no shits? It's almost sad to see how decent this show could have been if Asta wasn't here. Please kill him so I can get back to the only hot man this godforsaken show will give me. WHY CAN'T THE SHOW JUST BE THIS ALL THE TIME. Goddamn he's cool. Okay that "just gonna jam this baby into your chest area" line actually made me smile. Aw fuck he has to die nown because this series is actively trying to make me hate it. I relate strongly with that Future Yami plan. Oh hey, decent nun's still alive. Why is sister fucker still allowed to exist. Okay Yami use Asta and the sister fucker as shields to protect your sweet buff arms. I aspire to give as few fucks as Yami does. Are you shitting me he beat him with a goddamn mirror. Whelp so much for the tolerable part of the show. Y'know what I actually hate this show even more now after these two episodes; all this time I thought it was incompetent but it turns out it was capable of being a decent series all along and just chooses to be garbage. Naruto- Just fuck off already, Sasuke. Kakashi just step aside and let all three of them kill each other. HE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND, YOU DUMB SHITS. Seriously why has anyone ever liked Sasuke? Too late, I already wish I hadn't seen everything in this show. Hey remember when he gutted you like a fish like 10 minutes ago in-story? You care because you're a dumb bitch with low standards. No shit he's gonna kill Sasuke, that's been the fucking plan this whole time. Oh god what the hell now. We're getting Bort next month so I already know they live but man I can hope they kil each other. Don't worry I stil hate you enough for the entire village. Man, this show really knows how to abuse that flashback button. Here's our protagonist, genuinely happy to hear that his classmate's entire family was slaughtered.

A gift from Josuke, Dio and Avdol's voices.

You had me at Dad Might. Hero- Oh cool, world building. God I love Buff Might. Tiny Deku continues to be the cutest thing I've ever seen. Now if only you could use your powers without breaking all your limbs. This OP needs more hot teachers than it's giving me. League of Villains is still a stupid name. Hi boyfriend who are you talking to? Oh hey, All Might has a real name and that fact never occurred to me before. Fuck you, hand guy. Principal Mouse is precious and I want to hug him. What you're telling me is hand boy is a whiny bitch boy and I'm righ to hate him. Well hey, taking down 72 viallins is still a pretty good day. I love his mom. Hey now, you kept Aizawa's face from breaking even harder and I appreciate that. Poor invisible girl. I love all these kids except Bakugo. Aizawa should probably have just taken the day off and got some sleep. Worse than villains, gym class. I'm with grape boy here, maybe you should focus on your students not getting killed. It's just bigger than the olympics, no pressure or anything. Damn that's harsh. HOLD THE GODDAMN PHONE was that a hot dude with fire powers in that pro hero montage because everyone knows that is my fetish. Invisible girl is so cute. Iida's little dance. Calm down there Ochako. Frog. Oh, she's Nami. AWWWWWW TINY CHAKO. I love All Might so much. Hey there, Icy Hot. Aw shit that's not good. Poor boyfriend. He's so sweet he couldn't even kill a villain. Put me to bed before you lose buff mode. Jesus boyfriend, that's not a shitload of pressure or anything. Aww that's cute the ED is all the girls. PTE- Haters gonna hate. Hellshake Yano time. These unnamed dudes flipping pages are the real MVP here. Wasn't this an episode of Dandy? I like the wave. That was incredible. You saved me from that bitch! And then she wes a baby. I goddamn love the cooking segment. MANATEE NO. Owwwww god that hurt. BD version. Nice seaweed hat. And then Pokemon. That's how I am with video games too. Jojo- Fuck you, Dio. Oh hell no Joseph you get your hot spirit ass back in that fucking body. Stop killing the men I love, you asshole! Jotaro you idioit. Oh fucking sweet we get SOUND EFFECTS. Aw fuck he can freeze time longer now. Yeah you've been immortal for 100 years b ut you spent 96 of them in a box underwater. Okay that weird little giggle is making me laugh. Whelp we're fucked, better hope Joseph was sleeping around a couple decades ago. FIST THAT MAN, JOTARO. What in the fuck he just dropped a goddamn steamroller on him. Where did he even get that fucking thing? Aw fuck we're doomed. EAT SHIT, DIO. I don't really understand what's going on but I'm glad to see Dio fail. ARE YA FEELIN IT NOW, MR KRABS? Ouch right in the leg. IT'S HIGH NOON. That sure is some big talk about how humans suck considering he stole another dude's dick and couldn't master that body after 100 years. Fuck you, Dio. Aw shit Splats broke. What the fuck he gets hit in the leg and fucking explodes. God Jotaro is so cool. Y'all should probably set his body on fire. I'm disappointed that Polnareff survived out of all of them. Yeah that's a great idea turn Joseph into a sexy vampire. You fools think that Jotaro can't restart somebody's heart? Aw shit he took over grandpa. I goddamn love you Joseph. I missed sharing a birthday with Joseph by five days and that's disappointing. Brink of death nothing that man was stone cold dead. Eat shit, Dio. Avdol. If Polnareff's not gonna take you up on the offer, you can adopt me instead Joseph. Awwww, manly hugging. HOLLY'S ALRIGHT. Jotaro you stupid bastard why would you get on another plane with Joseph. Oh you just had to slip that picture in and break my heart one last time, show. Hunter- Surf cat. Hope you can swim good, dude. Nice boat. Whelp, you're gonna die. Not the harpoon! Now beat the shit out of him with that pipe. I don't think your friend came out ahead in that fight. Uh lion dude won't you need to breathe too? This is clearly not a trap for you. Eat shit, lion douche. I think you're just having a heart attack. Dude's just chilling on the floor. Okay that is some crazy amazing lung power you got there. And nothing of value was lost. Oh god Palm that's just gross. Good luck with not dying here. Meanwhile, my son is alive! Thanks, octosquid. That's a lot of money. Awww Gon's so happy. Hi Knuckle, please don't die! Oh my god snap out of it you little baby bitch. Jesus Killua have you been training with All Might. Aww, they're friends this is cute. AWWWWWW THIS IS SO SWEET. I'm surprised how many of these monsters are decent people. Clover- How is this arc still not over. Shut the fuck up, sister fucker. So this dude is definitely just dimestore Griffith without his mask, right? Whine harder, douche. I do like seeing Asta in pain. Hey there Captain Sexy. Oh good he's still drunk as fuck. Kill them all, only attractive man in this show. Hell no you shut the fuck up and let the only decent person do this fight. I enjoy him not giving a shit about any of this. Stop talking I just want to see the buff guy flex. Yami is by far the most teolerable character in this show. Aw fuck he has to die now because I didn't hate him. How's that feel, douchebag? Yes send Asta in to fight, I want to watch him die. Goddamn asshole used a full restore. I enjoy you, ripoff Zoro Forget his neck tell me what else is thick. I also don't mind if you hurt Asta a bit, in fact I prefer it. Just let the dumb bastard die. Aw crap he didn't die. Oh shut the hell up already. At least Yami's having fun. Eat a dick, light douche. Well I'll be fucked, Black Clover actually managed to give me an episode that I didn't hate with ever fiber of my being. Naruto- Sleepy dog is cute. Kill her, Sasuke. Kill her, Sakura. Yeah, go ahead and be the replacement for the girl he just mortally wounded. If either of them kill each other I'd be okay with that. Fuck you, Sasuke. Why does anyone find Sasuke worth their energy? Kick his ass, Kakashi. God this kid is just fucking insufferable. Everyone point and laugh at this stupid blind idiot. Jesus christ you dumb bitch. Oh great, more flashbacks I don't give a shit about. Oh, did it finally snap out of flashback for the last ten seconds?

Mother of god that is my type.

So hey was that a hot dude with fire powers they showed in that pro hero montage because jesus christ that is right up my alley. 😍😍😍