EmpressAngel

I meant attractive dudes.

Looks like I'll be getting stuffed by giant buff dudes on my own time, then.

Jojo- Hey you know what I miss, it's my goddamn boyfriend who got shot in the face. I sense a douchebag in this car. Polnareff's a dumbass don't let him drive. Oh goddammit not that kid again just run her over. Kid if you think a sweet set of knockers are gonna hold you back in life you are drastically mistaken. THE CAR IS A STAND. And then they got hit by a truck. I agree, Jotaro is really cool and also attractive. Aw crap now they'll never find the way. JOJO NO DON'T PUNCH EVERYONE. I feel like this is a bad idea. And then they fell off a cliff. Poolnoodle you dumb fuck. Joseph you have magic tentacles too maybe you could help. Thank god Kakyoin's the smart one here. I'm glad Jotaro's having fun. Yeah the magic teleporting car definitely wasn't a stand. Would you like to buy a vowel? Well hey at least it looks cool now. The hell is it shooting? Use the kid as a human shield. Leave her behind. I know that feel, kiddo. Joseph screaming "OH NO" will never not crack me up. Punch it in whatever the equivalent of balls it has. Aw shit that can't be good. Hey you know who had fire powers who could probably shrug this off if he wasn't fucking dead? Oh good he's okay. It's nice to see that Jotaro inherited Joseph's insanely buff arms. Dude skipped leg day and everything else but arm day. Now steal his shitty car too. He's gonna die out there. I got a bad feeling about Yoda here. Gundam- Kill her, Mika. This series continues a proud Gundam tradition of me being unable to follow a single damn fight but at least it looks cool. Yay they won I think. I'm also confused here, kids. Big talk for a guy who literally has a target painted on his face and just got captured by a ragtag gang of children. Hi harem man how's your super hot main wife. Suck it, douche. HI MAIN WIFE I LOVE YOU. Fuck off, kid. Mika continues to not give a single fuck. No big deal, just a universally-liked diplomat's life in danger of assassination. Just kill him, boys. Why does this guy have a face like that Titan that age Eren's mom? Start taking limbs as payment. Mika does not fuck around. Now loot his corpse. Do her parents know that the maid they trusted their only child with for years was actually a spy sent to murder her? Come work the dirt farm with the hillbillies, princess. Does harem guy finally get to be reunited with his fightin' wives? This seems like it's going too well. Why did people just bury their robots? I still don't trust Geass. Orga this seems like a decision that's going to bite you in the ass sooner rather than later. Hunter- Never trust Hisoka. Dude have you looked at Hisoka, of course he's a freak. I am uncomfortable. Wait shit isn't that Killua's sister? Do not leave Hisoka alone with that small child. Kill him now, girl. I'm not sure I like these guys' odds here. I hope my kids are healing well. Her skirt is magic. He's doing his best. What in the hell? Okay that's definitely a stand. Boo hoo, the douchebags are in trouble. Oh, fuck off. Whelp, this guy's about to die. This plan could definitely be going beter. Now that's a big rock. Oh this is gonna get annoying. It's refreshing that Gon is sucking at this technique. Good luck kids I believe in you. Do you have a card for just punching him in the dick a couple dozen times? Ohhh this can't be a good thing. This is suspicious as fuck. Whelp. Lupin- Never trust a priest in anime. You okay there Jigen? Don't be a dick, Fuji's body is great. Alright cool you just gotta steal a cup. Bet on yourselves, you either make a fortune or die before you have to pay. Aw crap who's hypnotized now. I'm digging Fuji's outfit. I mean, he's got a point about Fuji. Everybody just sit down and keep your eyes on each other for a couple hours. I dunno man, I'm pretty sure one of them can fit several tools in their rack without you noticing. Please don't hurt her I love her. NO NOT THAT GLORIOUS RACK. Jigen not smoking really is suspicious. Whelp Lupin's dead, show's over. Maybe the puppet is Zeni in a surprising twist. Guys no don't kill each other, you're friends. Is it the oysters again? GODDAMMIT LUPIN. I can't blame him for being curious about who'd win in their fight. Well this is a downer ending. Eat shit, asshole. No knife can penetrate Fujiko's boobs of steel. Drugs are bad, kids. Seriously, I hope you guys bet every penny you had on yourselves in this fight. I'm glad Lupin is having fun here. Fujiko lying on a bed of shitloads of money is a beautiful sight. And hey, they got that fancy cup out of it.

I hope it's a Jojo marathon so I can make obscene jokes about getting stuffed by giant buff dudes. :fap:

I guess their reasoning is that adults like to get drunk and party on the weekend before Halloween so ratings would be down. But let's be honest, the venn diagram between Toonami viewers and drunken Halloween party animals probably doesn't overlap very much.

Jojo- Sorry your son was such a piece of shit, lady. Oh god your face. FUCK THIS CAT. Shut up Poolnoodle you got my boyfriend killed. I bet Avdol would have liked this place if he wasn't fucking dead. Ewww that's gross go see a doctor now. Well that's creepy. Joseph you fought a fucking god and you're scared of a a scalpel? Ohhhh that's not a good thing. What in the hell. What in the hell. Could you try hamon on it? Thank god Joseph is rich enough to buy his way out of this. Okay maybe he's not rich enough to buy his way out of this. Aw crap it's growing limbs. Heeeeee it's the OVERDRIVE. Whelp hamon doesn't work you're gonna have to cut your other arm off. I love Joseph so much. Meanwhile, Polnareff fucks it up. Pol you got my boyfriend shot in the goddamn face because you dwell on the past. Joseph is having a bad day. Where the hell did it get an entire cabbage? WHERE DID IT GET A CHICKEN? Stop calling him daddy it's creeping me out. Ouuuch. He's getting a lot of use out of that metal hand, thanks Kars. OH NOOOO. They're bizarre, you might say. Polnareff you stupid fuck. Where's Jotaro I bet Star could just rip that thing out with brute force. Drown your disgusting arm growth! Whelp he's fucked. Joseph is the best and I love him. Oh hey, he doesn't have to bust up cameras anymore. YOU'RE GODDAMN RIGHT YOU GET BETTER WITH AGE. I'm gonna fuck grandpa. Pol deserves this for getting Avdol killed. Where have you kids been all day? The keys are stuck in his hair. Aw crap now you're in a Stephen King novel. Gundam- Snickers and Cadbury are having a good time. I love the harem wives so much. I'm sure these redshirts will be fine. Shit is already hitting the fan, good luck kids. Always a great plan to use the children as human shields. Are y'all fucking yet? And then everyone died. Quick get the wives in an escape pod immediately. You and your ugly beard can eat shit, buddy. Kill them all, Mika. I'm fairly confident that nobody from the first season is gonna die so early. Dude you have a target painted right on your forehead did you really think that was a good omen. Harm wives are the real MVPs here. The claaaaaaw. Man it sucks to be these small children. Better restock Mika quick, shit's getting rough out there. Mmm, sandwich break. Thanks for the backup, Geass? CRUSH YOUR ENEMIES, SEE THEM DRIVEN BEFORE YOU. Whoever's job it is to name Gundam characters needs to be slapped. Scythe arms, go! Hunter- Ohhh that can't be a good thing. Use Hisoka as a human shield! Good job, how many organs did you three rupture. I do not like Hisoka's position there. I'm pretty sure being trained from birth by the world's greatest assassins probably had something to do with it too. Oh damn he was just dicking around earlier. Ging is not proud because he is a terrible father and doesn't deserve Gon. Please don't explode Killua's hands. Aim for his dick! Oh goddammit. Gon might be dead. I'm very uncomfortable with Hisoka groaning like that. No goddamn way, you're pulling my leg here clown boy. Reminder to never trust Hisoka. Now please get these kids some medical attention. Of course he's not here, being within city limits of his kid is a slippery slope to actually being a decent parent. It's nice to know that he's a great father figure to people who aren't his own goddamn child. "Here convicted murderer, fight my kid to the death I think he's in fifth grade." We came here for treasure, you asshole! He didn't come here for the cards, he's gonna go jack it to the memories he made. NEVER TRUST HISOKA. Aw crap what now. Oh no tell me jiggle bitch isn't dead. Kick his ass, kids! My poor kids need a break. This random man they've only known for about 45 minutes is a much better father than Ging will ever be. You can always try calling in your hot dad for support. Lupin- Just a couple of bros hanging out, nothing weird gonna happen here. Where did this dog come from? HIIIII FUJI. Sorry Jigen, Lupin can't resist those boobs and I can't blame him. Hi Zeni! I hope Goemon keeps that dog. Afternoon, hoes. Hi Zeni, again! That's a lot of smokes. Aw crap you forgot to get gas. I love this dog. GOEMON NO. Save the dog at all costs. I could stare at Fuji's boobs all day. What the hell how did you lose her. It's a wiener dog how far could it have gone? Me too, lesbian dog. This guy's having a good day. Goddammit Zeni just let them take the lesbian dog home. And then he died. Fuji is in hell. Beard maintenence is very important. Is it a hot bitch alert? Sorry Goemon you got cockblocked by the dog. Aw shit not again. Good job you failed. Oh god you're not gonna ramp some shit are you? YEEEEHAAAW. Poor dog. Oh nooo. Goemon finally gets some sushi. A happy ending for the lesbian dog is the best outcome.

Goddamn, I'm gonna bang grandpa. :fap:

There are over 1200 characters in the series, we'd never get anywhere if Oda stopped to mention every single person's sexual preference. She has 85 kids, tons of them are not married yet. Seen here, having a night out on the town with Hina. What about all the other dudes in the show with facial scars? Shanks, Garp, Rayleigh, Coby, Drake, Thatch, Issho, Jabra, Inazuma (who actually is queer, how did you miss that one?), Kohza, Hogback, Moriah, every single zombie on Thriller Bark, Brook, Absalom, Genzo, and probably several more I'm forgetting.

Every time you mention the drag queens I wonder how you constantly manage to miss Izo, who's goddamn gorgeous.

Do I think Netflix is some cartoonish villain, twirling its evil mustache while they pick up specific shows just to spite Toonami? No. I think it's much more likely that Netflix being a bigger company with a larger budget is simply able to outbid Toonami on a regular basis whenever they're interested in a series. I imagine they're both looking at the same data and watching for the same trends, and are probably gonna come to similar conclusions about what would be a good investment around the same time. Netflix isn't targeting Toonami specifically; they don't have to.

Jojo- Fuck you and your stupid name, Horse Boy. STOP SHOWING ME MY DEAD BOYFRIEND, GODDAMMIT. No let Poolnoodle stab him. Aw fuck the mirror guy's still here. Yes it is his fault but I can't hate him until he avenges Avdol. Christ he's awful. Way to fuck it up. Kakyoin where did you get that car so fast. YOU JUST LEFT HIS CORPSE IN THE STREET GO BACK AND GET MY BOYFRIEND YOU ASSHOLES. Oh I'm so glad you learned your lesson but it would have been great if you didn't get your friend killed. THANK YOU, KAKYOIN. Come here Joseph we can hug each other and cry over our loss. No dude, you are an idiot but that's beside the point. Aw shit he can go anywhere with a reflection. He'll be fine it's not like he got shot in the goddamn face or anything. I don't know anything about light and reflection so I'm just gonna assume this makes sense. You're gonna have to stab out this small child's eyes. Stop trying to be cool it's too early in the episode for you to win. That's surprisingly smart of him to figure out. Good now stab him. POLNAREFF NO YOU STUPID FUCK. Oh he is real creepy looking. Whelp y'all are screwed start stabbing out eyeballs. Jesus he's gross please kill him already. POCKET SAND. Avenge my dead boyfriend! Cut his dick off before you send him to hell. I forgot 2% Horse was still here. The old Joestar technique. THANK YOU JOJO. At least he got a funeral. Stab him good. Goddammit woman you could do better! Okay I hate him but he's cracking me up. Well hey at least you got a cute girl out of the deal. Oh shit what now. At least I still get to keep Avdol in the ED. Gundam- I hope Mika continues his tradition of giving absolutely zero fucks. I have no faith in any of these new kids surviving. Never trust a shady old rich man with a butler. Orga looks real good in that suit. You go to a child mercenary gang and didn't think you might die? I love the harem squad I hope they get back to their husband soon. Aww she made her a friendship bracelet. OH GODDAMMIT WHY IS HITLER BACK. What are you up to now, Geass? Fight the pirates. Thanks Godfather now go eat a cannoli. Don't call him Shirley. This company works surprisingly well considering it's run by a bunch of schoolkids who never learned how to read. "It tastes better than garbage" is the highest compliment you can give someone's cooking. Mmm, real chicken. Oh dude you are gonna die. Kill him, Mika. Could somebody just throw this kid off the roof already. Ewww, that looks painful. Kid don't waste good meat. Kid you're a dumbass and your plan is going to go horribly wrong. I have no idea who these people are. Is every Gundam series required to have some douche in a stupid mask? Hunter- Dodgeball gets real intense sometimes. I got a bad feeling about this guy's odds he seems too confident. And then shit immediately went awry. Just let Hisoka murder everyone. Thank god Hisoka is apparently a limbo champion. I am immediately uncomfortable. Damn your stupid impractical fancy clothes! Don't worry Gon I'm not good at math either. Come on kids don't fight just beat some thugs. Good luck here kids, I have no idea what you're trying to do. Gon doesn't fuck around. That's not good enough he's out for blood now. Wait where's Hisoka I get worried when I can't see what that fucker's doing. Take all those pent up daddy issues and punch a hole right through his chest. Aw boo he didn't die but at least Gon is happy. Thank you Hisoka, a sentence I never thought I'd say. Oh no how is my adorable child hurt? KILLUA NO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE. Oh that's not good, hands are important. Ohhhh that looks painful. Please stop hurting yourselves! Okay but never trust Hisoka anyway. Please heal Killua's broken hands immediately after this. Every time Hisoka giggles, I'm filled with a sense of dread to the very bottom of my heart. Lupin- I want that diamond. I'm guessing Fujiko's gonna need that rock and I don't blame her. NO NOT THE DIAMOND. Thanks, Jigen. Glasses, they'll never suspect a thing! Aw crap it's a bomb. Yes, being killed is usally not good. Lupin were you just walking around with a fake Harvard diploma for emergencies? Yeah that doesn't sound suspicious at all. Fuck off, Ricky. At least you got a porn mag out of it. This is a very weird episode. Seriously, just tell Fujiko that diamond's here and she'll take care of the problem for you. Why do you nerds have a bomb anyway? Oh my god these idiots. Quick, hit him with the mop! I don't know what the hell is going on but I'm enjoying it. Guys, Jigen would be happy to shoot these guys for you. Okay but were did the diamond-powered time bomb fit into this plan? Aw fuck it's Ricky. Uh hey Lupin maybe you wanna step in here? Thanks, surprise Jigen. Oh hey Zeni. I'm pretty sure the Ultimate Chicken already got killed off in Jojo. Now give that to Fuji in return for all the blowjobs you could ever want. NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING. Things ended well for teacher. HI FUJIKO. Sweet Jesus. Thank you dolphin! :fap:

This is cracking me right the hell up.

I sure can't wait to see who my love kills this time!

Whelp, looks like I'm marathoning Stranger Things that night.

His body's not even cold yet, have some respect! Also that depends heavily on how open Joseph and Suzy's marriage is because I bet at 70 she could still kick my ass.

WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME Jojo- Joseph asking the real questions, where can you get a burger. I love Avdol and I hope he doesn't die. TOO MANY PEOPLE. Indoor voices, Joseph. What in the hell. I would not trust that toilet. Well that's terrifying. That gratuitous French cracks me up. You gotta kick his ass, Poolnoodle. Goddammit Frenchie you're gonna get yourself killed. Listen to Avdol he's smart and attractive. If Polnareff doesn't want your company I'll definitely take it. You asshole I'm gonna kick your ass for him. Y'know what fuck you go ahead and get yourself killed. And here's some weird dude riding an elephant. Girl you could do better. This cowboy dude seems like a douche don't trust him. Ohhhh this guy is creepy as shit. His power is a gun that's hilarious to me. I don't like Pol's odds here. Ohh this is probably not gonna end well. Hol Horse is a stupid name. He's got a point, Polnareff's kinda dumb as hell. They're both dorks. THE BULLET IS A STAND. Avdol no he's not worth it. Ohhhh I got a real bad feeling about this. It's too early in the show for him to die, I think to myself asn I completely forget about Jonathan Joestar. WHAT THE FUCK. Aaaaand I'm crying. I hope Kakyoin's right and he's just knocked out because I can't lose another one. THIS IS BULLSHIT. Hold me Joseph while I cry. Fuck you Poolnoodle this is your fault and I hate you. At least I still get to keep him in the ED. Gundam- Oh right i forgot that Famous Amos died. I hope we see more of the harem boat this season. So shit is still completely fucked for these kids then. Shut up, random boy. HAREM ALERT. He looks good in that suit. Oh hey that one lady's still here. Hiiii hot main wife you're still my favorite. I love Harem Man he's the best. She's done well for herself. Oh right Chips Ahoy has sisters. And then shit exploded. I'm not really sure what kind of timeskip we've had here, is Orga still jailbait? I feel like half these kids are gonna die. Meanwhile, douchebags. I'm glad Geass is still here. This girl annoys me already. Did you say meat where's Luffy. Oh good we finally get back to the main point: shirtless jailbait. Oh these kids are idiots and they're going to die. So did Mika ever get his own mini harem? Hunter- Jump good! Don't trust Hisoka on this. Constant punching, go! Bowling seems like an odd game out here. Kick his ass, Killua. And then that guy died. Well that was an easy win. Aw fuck it is a Davy Back fight. If you can dodge a nen you can dodge a ball. I bet these kids are great at dodgeball. Come on you babies I'm pretty sure there are ways to get yourself disqualified without getting your head destroyed. Oh yeah he was an asshole you were right to kill him. Hey can you tell Gon about his asshole dad? Gon's dad confirmed for worst dad. Monkey clones, go! That seems overly complicated. I feel like the ref is gonna cheat. This is going way too well. Ohh you're gonna die. Pretty sure this guy just broke several ribs. No shit the small children are gonna be better at dodgeball than you. Do not trust Hisoka but use his psychotic bloodlust to your advantage. Oh what the fuck. Use Hisoka as a human shield! Kid lost his shoes. Lupin- Hiii Fujiko. I feel like if you stole the Mona Lisa you wouldn't be able to actually sell it, since who's gonna buy something that's such an obvious crime? Which of these dudes is one of the gang in disguise. Zeno no you're not gonna break that-oh hey it's Lupin. Why are you still wearing that mask? I'd commit a crime just to get Fuji to give me a ride. Oh it's Jigen. Guys the building probably has a ladder. Hi Goemon. Lupin if y'all are out of money how can you afford all this shit? Huh, I wasn't expecting that. That seems downright cheap for the painting. Damn it Fuji you've screwed us all. Aw shit you better hope that's real. TABLE, PROTECT US. Hiiii Fuji's boobs. This is obviously not shady at all no sir. I like how Jigen's hat just appeared out of nowhere. Oh hey Zeni. I have no idea who has what anymore. That dress looks great on Fujiko but it'd look better on my floor. Is...is that immortal Da Vinci? Naruto- Hell no I might be back in five months.

Why does everything I love die :( :( :( :(

I mean, he's not my type but I'd be a fool to turn that tongue down. Jojo- Oh you are about to have a bad day, random mugger. Uhhh hey Kakyoin you okay there? BAH GAWD, HE'S BREAKING HIS SPINE. Since when were you friends? To be fair, I'd definitely break somebody's back on a bad day if I had that kinda arm strength. I am uncomfortable. I would also take an excuse to grab Jojo's sweet buff arms. Hey guys I think something's wrong with Kakyoin. Damn Kak what that mouth do? That's not normal. Thank you Jotaro this was getting awkward. I DON'T THINK THAT'S KAKYOIN, GUYS. Dude you already fought a monkey with a magic boat, how is this hard to believe? Oh no he's hot. Well this could be going better. I hope that's not his jerkoff hand. I like how this sentence actually makes perfect sense. Oh hey Kakyoin. Avdol asking the real questions here, why are you sunbathing in a full-length wool uniform? Sorry Jojo you're gonna have to cut your hand off. Aw shit fire just makes it worse. This poor kid's getting traumatized for life. A bizarre entrance, you say. I'd be lying if I said I've never honked my own boobs. OH NO NOT THE DOG. Why does this show hate dogs so much? Yeah buddy I think he gets the point now. YES THE SECRET JOESTAR TECHNIQUE. RIP that guy's beautiful face. Punch him harder, Jojo. Oh shit that dude killed Poolnoodle's sister. Oh you asshole. Is he close enough to just punch him in the dick? Ball-less little buttmuch, god bless this dub. IT'S JUST A PRANK, BRO. Oh good the annoying kid's gone. Back to my previous question, damn Kak what that mouth do? Goddammit the kid's still here. Ghoul- I hope this show ends with a nuke going off, killing everyone involved. I'm guessing he's about to eat his friend and not in a good way. "Remember when that dude tried to eat me, and now you're friends with him?" Oh for fuck's sake how are these people not dead yet? I'm not sure who all that blood's coming out of but I hope it's the styrofoam-flavored main character. Yeah yeah we get it this is all very sad and emotional can we just wrap this shit up already. You're a fucking cannibal zombie, how did you not smell gallons of blood pouring out of your friend? Shit's on fire, yo. You were wrong lady, school is lame. Why are you running straight towards the fire you goddamn dingbat? Sooo y'all gonna eat that perfectly good kidmeat? Oh hey that one dude's here. He's right, watching all your friends get brutally murdered and your home erupt into flames is great for building character. Wow I sure can't imagine a better use of screentime than showing this sack of flour walk across the street for several minutes. This show was bad and my life is objectively worse for having watched it. Hunter- Protect jiggle bitch at all costs, I can't keep losing fanservice. GUM GUM-wait wrong show. Gon is such a good kid. Don't fuck with a kid who was literally raised by a family of abusive killers, buddy. Ass shot. Oh fuck is this a Davy Back fight? ORA ORA ORA ORA-wait wrong show again. That was way too easy. Just let Killua take care of everything. Kick him in the dick, Biscuit! I'm not really understanding the point of losing everything. Nooo jiggle bitch don't go. Well so much for that plan. Please god don't call Hisoka. Aww come on kids don't fight. OH NO HE'S HOT. I am very uncomfortable. Never trust Hisoka, y''all. Bisky no this is a terrible idea. I'm glad they're smart enough to hate him. Thank you random fanservice. This town gives me the creeps. Kill him, kids. My children are brilliant. Oh fuck you, clown man. Narrator are you insane, you never trust Hisoka. Lupin- Christ Lupin you look awful. The hell is this theme? Wait did that song just say "I'm searching for someone I can satisfy on my knees" or am I going crazy. Okay this guy is definitely Jigen in disguise. Jailbreak, denied. Lupin why would you tell him that how is this part of your plan? Dude how did you even get that mask I'm not following your train of thought here. Zeni you might have a serious problem here. You really should have confiscated his sleeves too. Okay maybe that other guy wasn't Jigen. Whoever gets to monitor Fujiko is the luckiest man in the office. This is a trap. Zeni where are you getting that food from? Stop hitting rocks, Zeni! Just admit that you're in love with him, dude. Good job you finally beat that rock. Now can it be rescue time? You're a good dude, Zeni. Poor guy didn't even get to bang his fake wife. Zeni needs a hug. Lupin what the fuck. That is some impressive art there. And then Zeni died. Oh hey, Nyx isn't crazy anymore. I'll make it up to you, Fujicakes. Is..is that a pillar man? This ED sounds like a discarded Backstreet Boy track. Naruto- Aw fuck, Kakashi's actually dead? Oh wait false alarm. Sorry dead people, you can't escape the show that easily. Shikamaru knows this is bullshit. Really, one lecture from an obnoxious teenager and this guy gives up decades of vengeance in twenty seconds flat? Impossible, no god would intentionally allow this to exist. And now he's a mummy. I mean I get it, killing everyone in Naruto's village is an admirable goal. Y'all are acting real friendly for people who were trying to brutally kill each other like 40 minutes ago in-story. Haha, Naruto got fat. All these people are lying, I would expect a grand total of six people to have any faith in him. To be fair, he was a bother and a loser. You can praise him all you want, I'm still gonna hate every second this little bastard's on screen. Go ahead and recap the entire goddamn show. Okay why didn't they just end the damn show right here.

So uh, damn Kak what that mouth do :fap:

Speaking as a queer person, for the love of god could you shut up about LGBT+ representation for like ten minutes? It's exhausting to read, and it can't be healthy for you to be fixated on it constantly. There has to be something to your personality besides the fact that you like dicks that you can focus on occasionally.

Jojo- Polnareff's entire wardrobe is garbage. Okay Avdol giggling is adorable. Why is this kid still here? Poolnoodle you asshole. I volunteer to share with Avdol. I got a bad feeling about that creepy puppet. He ate everything in the mini bar, not even Joseph is rich enough to cover that. Well that sounds cheerful. They're all idiots here. That was surprisingly easy. His body's gone, nothing suspicious here. Owww. NEVER TRUST PUPPETS. Oh my god, get those nasty underpants off your wounds. God I would listen to Avdol read a phone book, preferably naked. Dude forget the key just get out of there. This entire thing is someone's fetish. RIP that guy. This is disturbing. Ohhh that's gonna leave a mark. Keep blindly stabbing you might hit something. Polnareff is dying while meanwhile everybody shit talks him upstairs. Well this fight could really be going better. RIP Pol's balls. He insulted his hair. It's a good thing Joseph is filthy rich because this room is gonna be a bitch to clean up. Shut up, puppet. God, this dub is a gift. Poor Poolnoodle. Thank god Joseph has the most powerful stand of all that can solve any problem, Shitloads of Money. Punch the TV! Oh sweet you found the porn channel...oh wait that's just Dio. Nooo not the TV. Kakyoin was already brainwashed and evil, maybe the magic TV people just didn't get the memo that he's fixed. Ghoul- Please kill them all, giant demon sewer baby. I feel nothing, show. Oh good, more people I don't give a shit about. This show has all the charisma of a dead possum behind a Wendy's dumpster. How the hell did none of you ever realize that there's two of those things when they look totally different? I mean you could notice that the wet diaper of a main character was wearing an eyepatch but nobody ever noticed that the giant hell monsters have varying numbers of eyes? Is it too much to hope that these two just kill each other already. That weapon looks hideously impractical. Show you are just wasting your time trying to build any kind of emotional connection with me here, I feel nothing but weary apathy. Mother of fuck it's only the halfway point. For some super elite warrior soldier, this girl sure sucks ass in a fight. Is one of you finally fucking dead? I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANY OF THESE PEOPLE, PLEASE END ALREADY. Jonathan Joestar died after eight episodes and yet this sorry excuse for a protagonist is still holding out after what feels like 900. Oh hey it's his friend dude. We lost One Piece for this and I will never not be salty about it. Oh what the fuck. Hunter- Some of these cards seem terrible. I got a bad feeling about this trade. Well that went awful for you guys. These dudes are having a really bad day. Meanwhile, my kids are doing great. Get that side hustle business going, kiddos. Start beating everyone's ass, boys. That cheap necklace is really coming in handy. Oh right those guys from back there. Good luck with that. I did not expect that to work at all. Oooh it's pretty. Go to hell, random lady. I do appreciate the amount of jiggle on this bitchy lady's boobs. Shock the shit out of her, kids. Eat shit, jiggle bitch. Oh no don't let jiggle bitch die she's the only fanservice we get here. Oh hey she can be a reasonable person after all. This guy seems nice I fear for his life. Hiii another cute lady. This is where Luffy shows up, right? Lupin- Jigen's gotta be pretty confident to bet a pack of smokes. Fuji his dreams are usually about your boobs. Dreams sure are weird. Dude she looks 14 please don't bang her. Buddy I am way too dumb for deep philosophy just speak real words. I have no idea how this is supposed to make sense but sure let's just go with it. My brain done broke. Bang your wife, Lupin. Rebecca needs a hug. Oh hey that guy's still crazy. Now how the hell did he program that in her voice? When in doubt, just set shit on fire. Wait what you weren't even married at all? He could have been banging Fujiko guilt-free this entire time! Batman would be proud of that gattling tie. I love that butler. Never tell me the odds! Oh come on you're the main character you can't die. Now let's have a quick detour into the physiology of sewer rats. So he definitely got mind swapped, right? Aw crap that wasn't supposed to happen. Zeni's the only one allowed to catch Lupin. JUSTIN PERSON, I GET IT. Get my checkbook, we are gonna get drunk as shiiiit. Naruto- Yeah no shit your friends are all dying when they're throwing themselves at super powerful ninjas. Nothing brings harmony like gratuitous porn, dead guy knew what was up. You probably should have just killed them. Please no more flashbacks to this douche's sad childhood. I don't really want to know how exactly this small child cured his writer's block for his porn novel. Best move in a fight, whip your balls out as a distraction. I guess he does have a point, if he just nukes entire villages then no one will be left to be at war. "Ohh, so I've been an asshole all along." Yeah yeah we get it Naruto's childhood sucked we already know that. Sasuke's not even in this arc! Wait, you know how to write to begin with? This entire damn show is pain, man. Well that was a lame as shit way to end a fight.

I see what you did there. Jojo- Why is he so evil and sexy, it makes me hate myself. I enjoy sassy Yoda here. I can't wait to see all seven of these assholes get wrecked. I don't trust this boat. Yes let Poolnoodle be the canary in your coal mine. I would also like to jump into sexy buff grandpa's arms. This boat is shady as fuck. Okay I definitely don't trust that monkey. Joseph's complete lack of indoor voice continues to crack me up. Aw fuck it's haunted. Little late on shielding her view, Jotaro. Don't worry Avdol you did your best. Please throw this child overboard. That monkey makes me uncomfortable. Is the monkey a stand? REAL UNCOMFORTABLE HERE, MONKEY. Oh this is a bad idea never get naked around a pervert monkey. Please save her from some fucked up monkey sex, Jojo. THANK YOU JOTARO. The ceiling fan is a stand! Okay watching a man get bitchslapped by a ceiling fan is hilarious. Is..is the entire boat a stand? Please get that girl some pants immediately. And then everyone died. I hate this monkey. I do like his fancy captain jacket. Please just let Avdol live, show. This is weird and needs to stop. I enjoy Jotaro shit-talking a fancy ape. THANK YOU JOJO, FINALLY. Welcome to the jungle, bitch. Get that kid some clothes already. This is indeed a bizarre adventure. That gum line cracks me up. Fuck you, Dio. Good news, you lived! I got a bad feeling about that hideous puppet. Ghoul- Is it too much to hope that they all just kill each other? I feel like I should have some kind of reaction at all to this whole thing but instead I'm just tired and want to stop. And then Waluigi showed up with a plasma gun because why the hell not, I guess. Well that sure sucks for this guy, I bet. Oh granny you picked the wrong time to see what that ruckus is. Bye, Waluigi. Yeah sure lady that's real deep and poetic now get on with it. Christ dude, could they not have given you a new mouth at some point in the past decade? Oh hey, our main character finally decides to do something in this show. That is an unsatisfactory conclusion, lady. This boy is exhausting. Sure let's bring this guy back whatever. Isn't that magic armor supposed to be killing those guys the longer they wear it? This kid is annoying as shit but at least somebody's enjoything this train wreck. Hey grandpa look on the bright side, if you die you don't have to be in this show anymore. Way to suck and fail, you poor excuse for a protagonist. Oh what the hell is this, is that the sewer baby? Hunter- DICK SAKURA sounds like a great store. OH SON OF A BITCH IT'S PIG FUCKER. Oh hey it's the auction guy. Well that seems suspiciously easy. Whelp so much for auction guy. Jesus Killua does not fuck around. This shit still works better than AIM ever did. Aw fuck it's that guy. Shut up Biscuit. Aw crap please don't let Hisoka be here too. GODDAMMIT HISOKA GET OUT OF HERE. Hi Kurapika! This guy's having a rough day. Oh right, the boss guy stole her power and I guess she never got it back. That's a real weird way to say Lucifer, kiddo. Meanwhile, side quests. Fuck off, douche. Fuck off, other douche. Okay miniature dragon sounds adorable. That went too well, it's suspicious. Welcome to Vegas, kids. Oh no, it'll definitely kill you. I don't like your odds, random guy. Killua's got a bit of a gambling problem. Lupin- Damn, she smokes more than Jigen. Uh show, I can't read Spaghetti. That is a nice outfit. Well this fight could have gone better. Make her sign the divorce papers before you rescue her. I'm already too dumb to follow this. That sounds like they ran it through Google translate. That house is definitely haunted. Rebecca's having a rough day. Hiiii Fujiko. Please tell me this plan involves Fuji's boobs. Oh hey, it's that one dude. That guy he's taling to is definitely Lupin in disguise. Everyone is Lupin in disguise. Rebecca's day has slightly improved. YESSSSSSSSSSS FUJIKO'S BOOBS. James Bond would be ashamed of you, guys. Aw crap. This butler guy is great. Oh shit, butler's not fucking around. Ohhhh no he's hulking out. Oh hey, they got away easy enough. The plot thickens. Fujiko is enjoying her suffering. Okay Lupin is way nicer than I would be in this situation. Naruto- Should have just let snake Blum punch their heads off. Good job porn man, this was all your fault. The answer to true peace is gratuitious pornography, I could have told you that. This is a history lesson I neither want nor care about. And that's how the shitlord gang was formed. Gonna be honest here I am having a staggeringly hard time caring about anything in this extended flashback. Wow what a suprise the two guys with rhyming names were best asshole buddies together. Well shit he just ran straight into that knife. What the hell is this thing? And then everyone died and I couldn't care less.

i was out of town all weekend so super quick thoughts. Jojo- Avdol continues to be extremely attractive and needs to lose some clothes. Joseph looks like a gay sailor-themed hooker and I love it. FUCK THIS SHARK. This child annoys me. Throw her overboard anyway. Jojo having nicotine withdrawls sounds like it'll get violent. Good you found him now murder him. Just let it have the kid. I like Avdol's line he's so cool. And then Jojo died. I don't know why he sounds like Hulk Hogan but I like it. Avdol your power is fire what are you even gonna do down there? You can absolutely get a Star Finger dildo if that's what you're into. And then everything exploded. That's a big boat. Ghoul- I don't think I'm lucky enough to have all these people die. Way to ruin the moment, ya dick. Okay why would you announce the surprise attack on the ghoul hideout on the news before it happens? If you knew the cops were coming, why didn't you just leave? Did...did she rip his lips off? Dude you're twice her size, just lock her in a cupborad until it's over. Okay I can respect this asshole's desire to get laid one last time. Oh fuck off, Hisoka. Hunter- Just kill them, large man. Yeeeeah Killua didn't exactly have the best home life. Oh right Killua isn't a real hunter. I hope he just straight up kills Pig Fucker this time. Tree. Well that sucks for y'all. Don't trust this guy. That is one ugly monster. And then everyone died. Man they're lucky, I never got any rare Pokemon cards. Awww, those things are still Gon's friends. Lupin- Hiiii Rebecca. Hiiiii Fujiko. I mean, you can't blame a guy for trying. Wooooow Lupin you are doing impressively bad. I wouldn't trust either of these women as far as I could throw them, but Fujiko has bigger boobs. Oh sweet, slutty hog wine. Oh dang his wife was cute. Poor Lupin. New plan: Just ditch Lupin and be lesbians. IT'S ALL SLUTTY HOG WINE. Come on, just have a threesome. Whoever made that barrel did some quality work. Well that's a boner killer. Naruto- Queue up the Linkin Park because it's angst ahoy. For a second I thought he was gonna eat the dog and I would have ragequit. And then they were Aladdin. Oh fuck this show. And unfortunately, they lived.

Jojo- God, he could fuck me. I will never get tired of Avdol's wonderful giant cock. Sorry Frenchie, that cock does not play by your silly physics. I don't think fire works like that. Your hair is stupid and I dislike you. At least he's nice enough to move the venue. Okay where the hell are they, Willy Wonka's acid trip? USE YOUR COCK'S FULL POWER, BABY. And now it's modern art. Avdol's gonna blow his top, and I'm gonna blow Avdol. Oh come on, he can't set himself on fire that's his own power! Fuck you, tin can. God he's so cool and attractive. Hahahaha, eat shit Poolnoodle. This seems like it went too well. I'm so proud of you baby you won so fast. Aw crap it's not over. Yeah go ahead and explain your power in detail, that always go well. So it's faster, but also naked. Okay I'm enjoying this playful banter. Oh no that's too many stands, you shouldn't have let him do that. You can go ahead and Red Bind me while you're at at. Gratuitous French intensifies. NO, LEAVE HIS BEAUTIFUL FACE ALONE. Okay tag me in, I'm gonna punch him in the dick. I hope this works. EAT SHIT, FRENCHIE. Jesus, Avdol has no chill. You're not a bad dude after all, you eyebrow-less freak. Are they gonna make out because I'm pretty okay with that. Goddamn Dio and his tentacle brain monsters. I'm with Joseph, now you can all be buddies! Poolnoodle has joined the party. He's looking for a six-fingered man. Oh that's a downer. He lost that hand in a really bad Kars accident. Ohhh this is depressing. Poolnoodle what is that pose. Congratulations, that was a terrible idea. Why is he so evil and sexy I hate him. He's got a falcon that's cool. Pol's tits are bigger than mine how does that halter top even hold them in. Jojo hates bitches. Boner alert. This song will never not make me smile. Ghoul- That girl should have punched him harder. Oh look, another character I don't care about. Yes yes that's a very nice story about cannibal murderers. If you wanna talk about strong and black, bring Avdol back on. This story is going too well, something terrible has to happen. Yeah, bad idea to fuck a cannibal murderer and make a baby with it. Christ lady, just feed it a corpse. And then she died, because nothing decent is allowed to happen in this show. Yeah just leave your baby in a goddamn sewer, that's a great idea. Dude I hope you learned a valuable lesson about throwing monster babies down in the sewer. Instead of moping over that bag of mayonnaise, just fuck your cute friend. Everyone is being followed and about to get killed, because that's what this show thinks is interesting. I still wanna be Batman when I grow up. Nothing more iron-clad as evidence than half a hunch in a fraction of your gut. This isn't ominous at all I'm sure nothing's about to go tits-up for them. I hope you poisoned that coffee, old man. I'm sure that's not a ham-fisted metaphor for anything. This show is like watching a hamster slowly chew its own leg off to escape a trap. Wow what a shock they're all fucked. Hunter- Bitchloli I'm exhausted just watching you screw with these kids. Oh no that thing's adorable don't kill it. GO, MEGA LIZARD. I love the bubble horse. My kids work so well together. Please, one of you take this opportunity to chop off that lopsided pigtail. It's okay kiddo you tried. You failed, time for more shovel leveling. Right foot on green, left hand on blue! I'm so proud of my kids they're learning so much. Damn, that is way too many rocks. I don't think that's correct, but I don't know enough about Rock/Paper/Scissors history to refute it. Oh right, these guys are still doing their own thing. He's about to stab you all in the back. QUICK, SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE. Man I hate when I'm just trying to play a game and some douchebag blows my face up. So, punch him in the dick and scream at him. Whelp, y'all are fucked. Whelp, that guy's dead and noting of value was lost. That sounds like the worst secret handshake of all. Aw crap, not these assholes again. Lupin- Boobs. Oh no not the boobs. Hey Goemon, where have you been? Oh lord what is this guy's voice. He sounds like John Travolta in Greese I'm cracking up. Well whoever was supposed to take that guy out sure fucked it up. Not today, scorpion. This is porn music. And then everyone died. Wow, she's got some moves. Thank you, samurai. Man, Goemon does not fuck around. Really should have gone back and shot that guy in the face a couple times. She really grew up cute. Well this could be going better. I got a bad feeling about this lady's odds here. Now kiss. Ohhh shit she's the killer. You think anybody's gonna believe an anachronistic modern samurai if he was dumb enough to go talking about a world leader he killed? Oh this is uncomfortable. Wreck their shit, Goemon! Do not fuck with Goemon. Wow, you dick. Good job I'm glad he died. WAIT NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING. That's some impressive stabbing. I guess that ended well? Oh good she's alive this was a good ending. Naruto- Again, hell no. Star- i promise I'll catch up next week.