Doom Metal Alchemist

For me it's like my dreams where I'm driving alone but I'm somehow doing it from the back seat.

I always have my car windows up while listening to music in the car for the same reasons stated above. If I do a shitty job of parking my car, I back out of my space and do it again, correctly. When I'm shopping at a record store, if I was carrying a CD because I was planning on buying it, but then changed my mind, I put it back in its correct place. If I'm pissing at a public toilet, I lift the seat up, because people who piss all over the seat and don't clean it up should be drug out into the street and shot.

You blew the opportunity to say "867-5309."

A little early for 4th of July supplies, isn't it? You should be getting festive Christmas ones instead.

This may be a stupid question, but.... does Zelda wield a sword in anything other than that one CD-I game?

Oh look, a perfect excuse to slap your titties. >_>

Pump-ing-iron-kin?

Ah yes, the lesser known Boston Snow Party. Not quite as famous as The Boston Tea Party, but no less rebellious. TAKE YOUR GODDAMN SNOW BACK YOU FUCKIN TORYS

.................It was one of Packard's toaster oven pork chops, wasn't it?

More like 24 inches OF bust, amirite or amirite?

The article in the OP says she was also the president of AS.... isn't / wasn't Lazzo the president of AS?

Who the hell are all these guests? Why would there ever be any non-members on here?

I ate with my parents.

He is?

You got me beat. I've been drunk once.

You're worse than Hitler.

Is it just me or does broccoli being cooked smell EXACTLY like farts? Like broccoli is just farts in solid form.

My mom makes lasagna that everyone but me loves. I'm part Italian but really the only Italian food I like is pizza.

I hate cans of peas too.

I don't know if I've had pecan pie. Hell, I would welcome my face being shoved in one, at least I'd get to try it.

Most overrated dessert is cheesecake. So there!

I like his guitar.

How are you playing Game Boy games with someone in Brazil?

Epic mullet made even more epic by being coupled with the mustache.

Just put sun block on it, as a bonus it doubles as a lube to help you fap.