Mix

Imagine the guy who is flipping through channels at three in the morning, when suddenly the crackhead he fucked in a Texaco bathroom back in '92 is telling him about the wonders of his patented fill while gently cradling a pillow like it was his lover....imagine that guy....what does he look like? is he married? what's his financial situation? does he tell someone or keep it to himself?

Murderer

We're gonna have to take care of this You're gonna need two green spray paint cans, an emperor penguin, a 4 lb fire extinguisher, twelve road flares, and double sided tape

He was all, "Sir, my name is officer jedediah springfield and you are under arrest for public indecency" Can you believe he never knew about the Simpsons character....said he didn't even watch the show....unreal

been watchin' it.....over and over....I've even started to take on Depp's mannerism's from the movie....I may have a problem

Zeni, if you're willing to study and pass the bar, i'm willing to get a very fast car with no top, cocaine, a tape recorder for special music, and acapulco shirts for our trip to vegas

ahh, I see....well done

One of god's own prototypes. A high powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.

I don't know who these guys are.....I don't watch wrestling, but I knew she did and thought that was a funny way of making light of the situation I do wanna take a swing at guessing their names though.....The Bee Twins? Los Abejas? The Electabuzzers? Dad Bod Squad? Los Ultimos Disfrances Disponsibles?

covid-19 and pneumonia that doesn't seem fair

Sounds like a beast You should stop your bitchin' and lock that down

I'll still be banished from 24 hour fitness for smoking on the treadmill In my defense they won't let me stream porn on the treadmill tv, so what the hell else am I supposed to do....exercising is hella boring

that jacket makes the outfit....should of kept it

Isn't that the little monkey that likes getting drunk off fermented grapes or somethin' God speed, monkey......god speed

it took me forever to find it and I'm sure there will be consequences........................................................................worth it

I'm not a good person....I'm relatively self aware in that regard, but I like to believe i've gotten better.....and this new, better, me still would have told this dude to suck a dick and I wouldn't have said it that nice....at least tell me your still getting hooked up with the free weed...he's the guy whose family owns the dispensary right?

happy birthday the ol' dirty thirty........one I'm just gonna start pouring you a glass here and you just say when

Idk what I had cause I just stayed home but Web MD said that was a possibility....I'm good now though Oddly enough that's the brother I most identified with from that movie...totally knew he was gonna die

it sounded like it was from something....like Sealab