molarbear

Shower poof ball is the way of the future

you should eat some pizza

I use Pandora the most. Especially on commutes, it relaxes me just enough to not yell at someone for being a shitty driver

Grizzly And no, I am not proud of myself

It's kind of bitter sweet. I mean he hasn't done so hot the last couple years but it still sucks to seem him go. At least he got to go out with the team he started his career in the MLB with and in his home Country.

Pssh.... no I use alta vista for that shit

I've clearly gone about my life entirely wrong up until this point

My dick is usually a dick in the morning mainly when I first relieve my bladder and it decides to turn into a nerf octo blaster

I dunno I don't bother to answer my phone if I don't recognize the number

I just pet the dog and zoned out. I think that's how I survived it

I got invited to my friend's wife's one because she says I'm one of her best friends I felt like a stranger in a strange land

I seriously miss this show

Due to my bachelor lifestyle and diet which consists mainly of turkey sandwiches I have to monitor myself somewhat TL:DR went to Dr because I didn't make boom boom for 3 days, Doctor said "Eat a fucking salad you moron" in a very polite way

Meh I generally don't fuck with them but there was a cute girl in college that was all excited to try one. The little reading thing moved a just ever so slightly and she ran out the door screaming. I never heard from her again and it was her Ouija board. When I told my Dad about it it lead to an even funnier story he had about taking a girl on a date to see "The Exorcist" and the girl did the same thing.

take notes of what "over the hill" is so I can practice for it in 8 years

I'm guessing this is like one of those situations where someone says "Maybe" when they actually mean "No"

Acceptable

If the Apocalypse happens can I be one of the 4 horsemen?

More important question Does he fist bump or hand shake? I know handshakes are more formal but I really prefer people that fist bump because there are some people out there with nasty hands

Bruh The struggle is real

You just need to carry a mini air horn with you and anytime their music gets too loud just blast it a few feet from them anytime they get a call Or take the stealth route and send an anonymous email to your HR dept

You know what we need? A WALL-E sequel! I most certainly didn't get misty eyed seeing WALL-E hold a broken umbrella over EVE while it was raining

It's on the galactic level one can only get by hooking up with an Asari