Mix

No problem.....I came here to chew bubble gum and complain about movie picks.......and i'm all out of...wait, nope, found some under the desk 🍬😋

Woman on the left - Newly in love, couldn't care less about homie Woman in the middle - In a solid relationship of a few years, will look, but isn't "looking" Woman on the right - Married woman with kids *phone call -Gina....hello.....Gina...................hello -Terry, I want a divorce -what? -I said remember to pick the kids up from your mothers -uh, ok -and use that damn gym membership I got you! -what? *click It's all about where you are in life

*He's way funnier though. Man does it for a living.....infront of people >.>

lol, I love that people are actually trying to answer the question....

Where on your shoulder? What kind of pain? Do you know how you injured it? How often do you feel it? How is your shoulder mobility? Are your shoulders even?

First off, nothing served cold has the characteristics of revenge. Icecream? Gazpacho? What the fuck! No, I want my revenge served piping hot! With ghost peppers, bitch! You don't want to be staring at a motherfucker who used to put fear in your heart with confused feelings like pity 'cause the years haven't been kind. It drains all the satisfaction out of it. At least you better hope it does 'cause if there's even a drop of satisfaction to be had, you find yourself trying and failing to explain to onlookers, and eventually police, why you're not the kind of person who gets his kicks by beating up homeless people. Idiot: No officer, like I said, he was bigger and scarier when we were eleven. Officer: .... Idiot: Yes, that's when the pool thing happened. Officer: ... Idiot: Yes, I understand it was a long time ago. Officer: .... Idiot: Well of course he's going to say he doesn't remember. It doesn't traumatize you if you're doing the bullying. Also, it looks like the drugs really did a number on him, so I'd be surprised if he remembered his own name. Officer: ... Idiot: No sir, I'm not fucking with you. Officer: .... Idiot: No sir, this isn't "a youtube" Officer: ..... Idiot: Yes sir, I know idiots like me do pranks on youtube, but this isn't that Officer: .... Idiot: Well, it's good you're bonding with your son, but that's a different brown guy you were watching Officer: .... Idiot: No sir, I would never jerk you around. I promise you i'm not FouseyTube. Officer: .... Idiot: I understand a pic would mean a lot to your son, but again, i'm not Fousey. Officer: .... Idiot: You're absolutely right, a pic is easier than going to jail.....thank you for being so understanding.....no, I don't mind holding the gun.... he's a good dad

happy birthday

too late

omg, it's not a guy dressed as Jesus.....IT IS JESUS.....It's just like in Preacher @1pooh4u

Hey, you don't go through what Jesus went through without developing a weird relationship with pain....and whips.....and guys dressed in leather >.>

that's not the one....if you're going to do it, do it right

it is "the" damn it I should know this, i've seen that scene more times than i've seen the movie it was in >.>

That'll work You know what, thinking back, I had an opportunity to be an eagle scout and I laughed it off....all those fuckers did was learn different ways to tie shit up.....those god damn freaks....the things they did on those camping trips while I was getting high behind Papa Johns....

hey that ticks the asphyxiation and dehumanization boxes, so you should be good to go....maybe throw in a rope just to be safe

that's not the next line

everybody's pickin' up on that feline beat....CAUSE EVERYTHING ELSE IS OBSOLETE!

ahh, see, look at that.....you can't make that thing dirty.....it's adorable....and it's the last thing we got after the news came out that Koala's are just riddled with STDs..... I grew up watching Noozles....I can't even imagine what Blinky was doing to Pinky

do 500 push ups and 1000 squats

I've got to google a lot of this....oh jeez, not the red pandas

I completely understand.... This was perfect, i'm going to need you to explain more things like this....why did mommy leave daddy?

Vacation is not a holiday or a place.....it's a mindset

If I know my porn categories, and I do, those are different things..... Are we just calling it the lifestyle now? Is that new? Should I pretend I've known all along to be kewl