NaBarney Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Staring me down over my night food I now know their schedule and the approximate trees where they live. No one talk about my problematic ornaments 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Zigzagoon sucks. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doom Metal Alchemist Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Little King Trash Mouth! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NaBarney Posted July 13, 2018 Author Share Posted July 13, 2018 6 minutes ago, cyberbully said: Zigzagoon sucks. Only one way to settle this *presses button on small pokeball to enlarge it slightly* 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Just now, Nabloom said: Only one way to settle this *presses button on small pokeball to enlarge it slightly* Ok, tomorrow....well, today....Any time after 6pm. It's your ass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NaBarney Posted July 13, 2018 Author Share Posted July 13, 2018 Just now, cyberbully said: Ok, tomorrow....well, today....Any time after 6pm. It's your ass. How convenient, the one night when you (psychically) know I'm working from 6 to midnight and then probably getting drunk afterward and not getting home until 4 Coward Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NSAID Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 What are their names Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NaBarney Posted July 13, 2018 Author Share Posted July 13, 2018 Just now, NSAID said: What are their names I don't know them like that but there was this enormous one that would climb up on a table to eat my neighbor's cat food. I'd come outside because it sounded like a big dog knocked something over and it would scramble away all big as fuck. I never named that one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 I'm not sure exactly how smart raccoons are anymore but they're some cool animals. In Omaha there's a place called Alpine Inn, and they have great fried chicken and fries... more like potato wedges I guess. They throw all the bones out on a deck in the back and stray cats and raccoons eat together. It's a great dinner and a show. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 1 hour ago, Nabloom said: How convenient, the one night when you (psychically) know I'm working from 6 to midnight and then probably getting drunk afterward and not getting home until 4 Coward How the hell would I know that. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 2 minutes ago, cyberbully said: How the hell would I know that. He said psychically fuckwad. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 2 minutes ago, GreatBallsOfJizz said: He said psychically fuckwad. I see that, but I don't get it....What does that even mean. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 5 minutes ago, cyberbully said: I see that, but I don't get it....What does that even mean. I feel like you're either really stoned or trolling me. And dammit, so am I. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 3 minutes ago, GreatBallsOfJizz said: I feel like you're either really stoned or trolling me. And dammit, so am I. I'm not trolling or stoned....Which is why I....feel physically stupid, I guess, for not understanding anything past the last 7 or so posts. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poof Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Nab vs nature threads are my fav! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codename: Jackass Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 How to remove possum from attic? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sandstone Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 They look so cute, but I know better. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 10 hours ago, Nabloom said: I don't know them like that but there was this enormous one that would climb up on a table to eat my neighbor's cat food. I'd come outside because it sounded like a big dog knocked something over and it would scramble away all big as fuck. I never named that one I had an interesting incident with a raccoon. I was going outside and this big lanky dude was near the door. I said, "What the fuck are you doing" and it froze and kept still. I walked out to the end of the driveway, waved my arms and told it to get the fuck out of there. It started coming towards me and I backed up appropriately. When it was crossing the street I probably crossed a little too close cause the raccoon got a little edgy, but I didn't care. Once we were on our own sides of the street I bowed low and said, "Thank you kind sir" because I'm weird. It nosed around in the other yard for awhile, looked at me, then stood on its hind legs and stared in a direction. I looked where it did, and when I turned back it got down and and crouched on its forelimbs facing me. Like I said it was lanky, so if you can imagine a four limbed animals bow, that was it. It then went about its business, and tested proximity to me a little. I was a statue but intended no harm, so it was fine. Later the house cat had an incident, reacting to the invader like the lion does. The cat was under a trailer and the raccoon was close, I told the dude to stay there and tried to call the cat. It waited for about three minutes while the cat howled, and then it moved in. The cat ran out towards me and I went and picked it up where it froze, somewhat near the raccoon. Told the cat he was an idiot and that other guy was gigantic and brought him inside. I'm not entirely sure how to interpret all of this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuggstop Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Why do you have the porch of a 80 year old hoarder? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkenwarrior Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Every time I talk about porch coons I get in trouble... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Give em a kiss 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quebecelegy Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 predatory eyes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilosipherStoned Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 Be careful.. I don't know about porch raccoons but camping raccoons try to jack you when you're sleeping. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 28 minutes ago, quebecelegy said: predatory eyes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 2 hours ago, Drunkenwarrior said: Every time I talk about porch coons I get in trouble... This is almost as funny as your Zyklon B joke. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkenwarrior Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 46 minutes ago, cyberbully said: This is almost as funny as your Zyklon B joke. Im flattered you remembered that Though I'm not sure how a terrible event in history compares with animals rummaging through my garbage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NaBarney Posted July 15, 2018 Author Share Posted July 15, 2018 This muthafucka was coming at me 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 On 7/13/2018 at 4:49 PM, Drunkenwarrior said: Im flattered you remembered that Though I'm not sure how a terrible event in history compares with animals rummaging through my garbage Daww, aren't we the clever little bigot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NaBarney Posted July 15, 2018 Author Share Posted July 15, 2018 He won't get off my neighbor's porch's roof and it's making his dog bark nonstop, how do I make it go away In before guns Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberbully Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 3 minutes ago, Nabloom said: He won't get off my neighbor's porch's roof and it's making his dog bark nonstop, how do I make it go away In before guns Antifreeze Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Train him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Throw pebbles at him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Bang a broom around Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Holler “get on outta here” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbagepailcat Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Find his bride 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Still Me Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Aww the little beeeeebeees.... give them corn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 Form an army and be like Batman. Except you're Coonman. HAHA! Racism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doom Metal Alchemist Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 17 minutes ago, GreatBallsOfJizz said: Form an army and be like Batman. Except you're Coonman. HAHA! Racism. I believe you mean "The Coon." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 2 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said: I believe you mean "The Coon." Simpsons did it! I am legitimately surprised, sort of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkenwarrior Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 12 hours ago, cyberbully said: Daww, aren't we the clever little bigot. The cleverest. And don't worry, I'll have my lawyer write up my apology speech for my Orwellian public shaming Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enad Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 This thread on the whole isn't nearly as racist as I was anticipating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_girl_lost Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enad Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 1 hour ago, Drunkenwarrior said: The cleverest. And don't worry, I'll have my lawyer write up my apology speech for my Orwellian public shaming The capacity of conservatives to disingenuously nail themselves to the cross never ceases to be hysterical. I control all levels of government yet I'm such an oppressed marginal group woe is me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkenwarrior Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 25 minutes ago, enad said: The capacity of conservatives to disingenuously nail themselves to the cross never ceases to be hysterical. I control all levels of government yet I'm such an oppressed marginal group woe is me. I I'm glad you reminded me I'll just use my white privelage to call big daddy Trump and absolve me of my wrong doing, so glad I have him on speed dial Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enad Posted July 15, 2018 Share Posted July 15, 2018 2 minutes ago, Drunkenwarrior said: I I'm glad you reminded me I'll just use my white privelage to call big daddy Trump and absolve me of my wrong doing, so glad I have him on speed dial I'm assuming you've sought out some sort of Gran Torino phone to accommodate those sausage link impersonators your wife insists are fingers? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkenwarrior Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 4 hours ago, enad said: I'm assuming you've sought out some sort of Gran Torino phone to accommodate those sausage link impersonators your wife insists are fingers? Nah, I just use the Obama phone for old people.... Yaknow the ones with the really big screens 4 hours ago, enad said: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enad Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 3 minutes ago, Drunkenwarrior said: Nah, I just use the Obama phone for old people.... Yaknow the ones with the really big screens I'm sure this made sense to you at the beginning but somewhere around "Yaknow" you lost confidence and fell off the bike. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bouvre Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 This one is a cutie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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