Doom Metal Alchemist

I don't know why not. IMO, in theory, putting cookies n cream pop tarts in the freezer shouldn't work, but.... I don't know, I eat all my pop tarts at room temperature. Which I guess is another thing that you might think shouldn't work, and yet....

I used to love that game throughout my whole childhood. The last time I played, I was probably in my 20s, I was completely bored out of my mind the whole time. Haven't played since.

Huh, what movie is that from? I was wondering where South Park got that character.

I recently got my first root canal. Come January I got to a get a crown. No where near as bad as your situation, but it's the best bonding I can do.

I honestly hate it when people disable autocorrect, because they still have no intention of ever fixing any typos.

*slow clap*

What is it called when you have an uninflated balloon wrapped around your dick and you cum?

You gotta teach your phone to recognize "no popping" as an intentional phrase. You got to keep un-autocorrecting it and typing it again and again and again and again.

Is it looning if you have sex with a non-inflated balloon?

Well if you type "no pooping" more often than "no popping" that's your own fault.

Does jacking off with a latex condom on count as looning?

What if instead of that they save all of the balloon stuff for you? 🤭

My work week is Sunday through Wednesday. Thursdays are great. 😄

Thursdays are great.

It's a Monty Python reference... is there anything beyond that?

I first learned it on Office 95, which I believe was the very last version that if you wanted to use any formula, you had to click into a cell, type the equals sign, and write the formula yourself.

Seriously though, is that that fake Twitter you like to post?

So much for "wholesome Christian family values."

How in the fuck in the year 2022 does Trump make a "presidential" announcement?

"I'm downloading porn at 14 kbps here." - Carl

AT THE SAME TIME

It's a lot easier to glance up at a digital clock from bed than it is to pick up my phone and hold it close to my blind ass face.