little_girl_lost

you need to hire R. Lee Ermey to yell at you to motivate you to fap

already a thing

in a store

they have a pepsi 1893 flavour that is ginger and a regular one that is supposed to be an original cola recipe, but it tastes awful

i sell that stuff, along with the white label, black label, and the spiked varieties also, pepsi 1893 is garbage

a Klondike bar

but..............can I still have my pudding?

what'd I miss?

i'm dying for laser surgery, but i'm not a good candidate for it

I had a spare pair that my ex bf threw away, he decided I didn't need them, then he declared that I was to only wear painful contacts from then on

fuck that guy

I found them!!! they've been missing since Thursday morning and I just now found them, they ere in a dresser drawer stuffed underneath some clothes what the fuck am I doing in my sleep that they ended up there? now that I have them i'm gonna look at stuff so hard, i'mma read all the fine print

before I went to sleep, I put them on the pillow next o my head along with my phone, I wake up and the phone was there, but no trace of the glasses, I've torn my room apart looking for them, but they are nowhere to be found I called for an eye exam (which I needed new glasses anyway) and the soonest they could get me in was june 1st, and then I know it'll be at least another week before my new glasses would come in FML

Mr. Gorbachev?

Rabble-Rabble Mother fucker

could be pre-menopause that can start as early as your early 30s

my boyfriend drinks these things they're expensive for a four-pack and I don't know anyone else who drinks them

beer is an acquired taste just like vagina

the voice of the caramel in the caramel m&ms commercial? sounds a lot like him and he does do a lot of voice work

CooooooOOOOOOOOOkie Crisp!

i just transplanted my tomato plants outside i'm hoping for rain

rotisserie chicken

hallmark is a fucking joke the cards and the channel