wacky1980

matching pants too. bask in this.

dressed for success

looks like you drew a little black dick on your shorts. nice touch. and speaking of touching...

work til noon and then party time. and i'm showcasing this entire christmas suit all day. loudest mf in the room, right here.

do the cool thing and pour the vodka directly into your ass. also, mainlining alcohol is totally a gateway move.

does your face hurt? because it's KILLING me! BARHARHAR nerve pain can be all sorts of issues, but still probably worth checking out if it persists. it's when the nerves quit working that you need to get to the ER with the quickness.

ethyl alcohol can't be injected in its pure form because it's impossible to distill to 100% purity, so there will be another liquid (probably water) it's cut with to keep it stable. as long as your quality and purity is as good as possible, i don't think it would be dangerous in small amounts. like, very small amounts. since the human body contains about 5 liters of blood, it would theoretically only take about 5ml (one teaspoon) of 90% pure ethyl alcohol to put you over the legal limit of 0.08% BAC.

i remember as a kid, having an artesian well with a collection trough (yeah, an open trough that anything could just fall into) in the basement, and a pump to pressurize the lines inside the house. there was no actual well pump to bring the water up. i can't imagine you've got one of those up the side of a mountain, but i guess it's possible to drill a well up there if there's appropriate runoff from farther uphill? i'd assume you're tied into muni service somewhere, but maybe the records weren't kept very well and the wrong person wouldn't know how/where to look up your account. if the bill is a minor amount, i'd just pay it under the condition they come out and trace your service line. then if they can't, you should be able to get your money back.

shit, you shoulda said something. we got barn doors, sliding barn doors, hayloft doors, swinging gate-style doors that only go halfway up so the horses can poke their heads out, louvred bin doors for letting the corn dry, trap doors to drop hay bales down into the dairy from the hayloft. steel, hardwood, laminate, you name it. might want to give 'em a quick pressure wash to knock the bullshit off first. but after that. AFTER THAT! you got yourself some nice deecor right there.

nuh-uh, it's not disco's birthday. oh ok, fine. hbd disco! *wink*wink*

it absolutely happened, but i don't need to prove anything to you motherfuckers.

wow. i mean, i'm honored you'd think of me in that way and all...but i'm not really into big dicks. they get one compliment, ONE compliment, someone strokes their ego just for a second, and they get this big head that's like, impossible to put down. i just don't have it in me.

oh. please, continue.

hold the phone- are you THEE big dick cheney?

of big dick? a little, yeah. i mean, he shot that one dude in the face on that hunting trip. that's cold.

oh. please, continue.

womp womp this one spans 4 hours too.

cock cheney? never heard of her.

"won" $2500 "gift card" sure thing, slickback.

cheney?

i mean, it's really not confusing at all to put five different dates on the license, three of which are tied to date of birth and two of which may not be. also, a vertical license denotes "under 21" but the vertical license doesn't expire until 3 months after the 21st birthday, so you have just-turned-21 folks running around with vertical licenses, getting all indignant and causing a scene when they're denied for having a vertical license. so even for a seasoned bartender, getting a vertical license creates at least a little bit of acute stress, which can increase the chance of a misread or calculation error.

i never really had much trouble when carding people. the most difficult part was when you'd get some far off state or a military id that you've never seen before. i've personally beat two stings that i know of, and denied a boatload of minors over the years. these kids think they're clever with fakes or whatever, but they forget we were kids once too and we already know their tricks.

they try to make it easy on a person by putting the dates in brightly-colored boxes and changing the orientation of the ID, but it's still easily fucked up, especially since a lot of people don't handle that kind of stress very well. here's an example of an illinois minor id card, provided by our good friend thor:

revenge of the lounge lizards on windows 3.1 was the peak of pc gaming.

bless your heart fuggs.