molarbear

FTFY

.... The dude just hits my funneh

After teasing a few times for just over 100 games.... The Cubs are above .500 again ...and people on reddit are comparing the Braves 2021 team to this team saying the Cubs have better numbers and should really buy, and I'm over here thinking of all the potential times before 2016 the Cubs had some flash

*Stretches neck really fucking far and stops eating leafs definitely Bee's, I was just born the same year Chernobyl happened This is why Central should be the Universal time zone for games/meetings/bidnaz/ and uemb

We throwing down at a 90's Mcduck's playground I was currently there auditioning for a role in the upcoming star trek, grey's anatomy, walking dead super mix where everyone dies in the first 10 seconds and you slowly over the course of 5 years develop a need to order charmin anytime you hear church bells I feel no further need to explain how my weapon of choice is going to end the world Janitor rebellion -end speech

Question @scoobdog Does the site we pick for the venue have to be SFW?

ELEMENTARY BROTENDO First one of them to build a banana fire wins ...also I forgot to vote, I gotta set my dings up

Whoever hired the assassin... they failed Cheap ass tried to take me out via toe crushing death by rigging the bottle of body wash to fall

No, I wanted to hover. (Although hover guinea is now on my wishlist) As in "not fly, but hover" Why molarbear? I don't like heights, but I also hate traffic and generally other people on the road That, and when people were like "OH WELL, BLAH BLAH YOU CAN'T FLY!" I could just hover away to further prove how awesome hovering is

Someone had to be the guinea pig ..I was hoping to gain the ability to hover

We know what you're really using all that spare money for

Thank you @scoobdog

Chills All the bad side effects of zoloft in a pill Yo.. we could sell this shit instant boner killing pills for when you get those "awkward" moments Carrying your Great Aunt's casket down the aisle front row and a random breeze blows against your pants? Never worry again when you take your Chills

To the great Feline of the Eastern lands!!!!!!!

Did I win the internet?

...>.> I feel like that may have worked better in hindsight

Welcome all to Molarbear's "Golden Banana Sticker Day" celebration! What does this day include? It's fairly simple, every citizen of the world is sent a package of golden stickers they are allowed to give out at the local petting zoos established in every city....everywhere (don't ask how on the logistics, you don't question Santa or the Easter Bunny just admire the hedgehog and remember, this is a day I made.. so there's a giant field full of pups that are just prancing around waiting to play) Later on when the younger crowds have had their fill the adult activities begin... The yearly "Try to out party Mr. Ed in his prime" challenge. Yes, this horse many of us grew up watching at our grandparents house did not die from horsey old age like you were lead to believe. This Horse had a 15 hooker, 3 8-ball, hot tub full of grey horse (grey goose use to have a different animal!) brunch habit that he chased away in his later years with horrid Ivermectin habit, and now you too can try to live like Mr. Ed for a night (horse banana not included) Finally once everyone is good and out of their damn minds we all join a group of baby seals to Hail Zorp the Surveyor! He's a 28 foot tall lizard dude who is suppose to bring about the world's end, but I think they have some kind of deal worked out with him where he just avenges all the seals that those european peeps still club, by setting them ablaze (seal snoot boops are heavily encouraged, even when their eyes start glowing red mid seance) After that everyone magically has banana pudding show up in their fridge...because I'm high and it sounds fucking delicious -end submission