EmpressAngel

I can't wait to be uncomfortably attracted to a senior citizen for the next year. <3

Jojo is back tonight and I am gonna fuck grandpa Joseph.

That is the saddest goddamn thing I've ever heard. You've held a grudge against a national food chain for a decade and a half because of a coupon problem.

-anime porn -ace's dick -big ol' folder of jojo dick I don't mince words.

It's kinda like continuing to go to work after putting in your two weeks notice. If I know it's gonna be over soon anyway, why not see where this trainwreck is going?

90% of Bleach characters were god awful and absolutely not worth wasting months at a time watching them shit up the page.

Titan- That smiling fucker sure is creepy. Clearly that arm was just holding him back, but I'm pretty sure this other guy needed his head. Yuuup, the old dude's about to die. Just let the lesbians happy together. Historia is a terrible name, you really should reconsider. SHE'S GAY AND LOVES YOU, IDIOT. Yeah just untie him and let Eren get his ass kicked again. Hahahaha you stupid bastard. Okay watching these kids suck and fail is almost funny. Whelp, so much for the old guy. Goddammit Eren go sit in the shame corner with that kid from Tokyo Ghoul and think about how terrible you are. Yeah this heartfelt moment is great and all but your old buddy's entrails are sailing through the air behind you. Y'all see those giant cannibal monsters wandering directly towards you, right? Uhhh what just happened? Of course he has magic titan-whispering powers now because why the hell not, I guess. LET THOSE LESBIANS BE HAPPY, GODDAMMIT. You're gonna have to fight the mole people for your food. Levi has done absolutely nothing this entire season. Eren's right, this is all his fault and he's terrible. He was absolutely not worth that sacrifice and those people died for nothing. TITAN GREEN IS PEOPLE. To be fair, the people you killed had become mindless monsters that feasted on human flesh by the truckload. Levi hates Attack on Titan more than I could ever hate it. Oh what the hell now. All this time and we still didn't tell us what's in that fucking basement. NOW BRING ON SEXY GRANDPA. Ghoul- Gee I sure can't wait for this show to murder all the energy Jojo builds up before it starting next week. The fuck is this? He's a dumbass and you should forget he was ever here. She's like 16 she's not an adult at all. Please don't let the small child wander around Murder Town on her own. Don't you have an actual girlfriend to fuck? I'd absolutely rather just die than be a zombie who can't eat mac and cheese. Oh no friend guy get out of here. I feel like friend guy is definitely going to die soon. I am concerned for this small child. She seems too nice I don't trust her. You're a delivery boy why are you allowed to just look at classified information. Yeah I'm sure giving the nutcase kid a giant goddam scythe won't come back to bite you in the ass. This show is painful. Why do they call him eyepatch when he stopped wearing the eyepatch last season? GET OUT OF HERE, HISOKA. Never trust Hisoka. Hunter- Sorry old man, you can't fuck a video game. Oh hey updated OP. I wish I could sleep for two solid days. Oh noooo the cute girlfriend. Aww that's actually really sweet. Did Gon get his hunter license back? I'm digging the rack on this auction lady. IF YOU DIE IN THE GAME YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE. Goddammit fat kid. Gon go get your license back. I forgot all about that tacky ring. Leave my adorable children alone just let them play. And then they died. Yeah I'm sure this is gonna go just great. I think Gon broke. I love my adorable children. Kid no that's a taser! RIDE THE LIGHTNING. That's exactly how I feel after work every day. Kurapika you're not supposed to eat metal. Oh hey it's that one dude and the other kid. I've forgotten what all of these things are. Leave him alone he's doing his best. POWER FIST. I'm so proud of them. Lupin- Hey Fujiko how you doin baby? Please don't kill my wife I love her. She's breaking up with you so she can marry me. She does have a point you married another lady. Oh you poor foolish boy. I'm disappointed that the clown did not die. Get it Fujicakes. You're after...magic tricks, really? Boobs. That tiger's having a great day. Wow this got dark. This boy is a lucky lucky man and I hate him. Also he's been jacking off constantly with that hand. Please don't eat her, tiger. Fuji doesn't fuck around. Well now he doesn't know the tricks anymore, you beat them right out of his mind. Fuji you wonderful bitch. He brained him in the skull why wouldn't he want to kill him. God I love her. Whelp this dude's gone off the deep end. I love Fujitits but don't trust her as far as you can throw her. I'LL MARRY YOU. God, fuck me. Naruto- He's got a point, if he kills everyone then technically there won't be anyone left to fight each other. Someone should have thrown that small child down a flight of stairs a decade ago. Hinata is adorable and much too good for Naruto. She's got those SPECIAL EYES. Leave her alone she's too good for this show. No worries frog lady, he doesn't listen to what anybody says to begin with. Hinata, the single bright spot of this show for the month. Oh honey, have some standards. I disagree with throwing your life away to help Naruto of all people, but I'm proud of you for doing your best. Naruto, sucking and failing for an entire decade now. Whelp this is going all to shit. You tried kiddo and that's all that matters. And there goes one of like, five decent characters in this entire series.

You just keep telling yourself that. I'm just gonna leave this here.

Remember how Kubo would forget about Ichigo for like, a solid year? Good times.

Titan- This seems like a huge risk to take for two people. I'm still waiting for that t-rex in the OP to show up. Mikasa should probably take a break. Oh good the cute one's alive. "I'm sorry for eating you" isn't what you usually hear from a lesbian. No I think "giant monsters that eat human beings" is a real big flaw that can't be ignored. Wait what how the hell did you steal magic shape shifting powers? JUST BE HAPPY GIRLFRIENDS TOGETHER. Mikasa doesn't fuck around. How did all these kids sneak up on you? Sasha I really don't think this is a misunderstanding I don't know how you'd misunderstand the situation here. I mean people probably wouldn't hate you if you weren't turning into a giant monster and eating them. Dude what the hell are you leading them right towards the kids? And then they got eaten. Whelp there goes the boss. Eren continues to be the worst. Jesus Armin what the fuck. Just let the lesbians be together. That's one fat bastard flying through the air. Aw shit it's that really creepy one that ate his mom. Ghoul- I completely forgot what's going on. Should I know who most of these people are? The small child continues to be the most tolerable character. I do like that Joestar bird. Yeah it sure does suck that these teenagers aren't fans of the people-eating cannibals. Oh no it's friend kid. This kid annoys me. He's a goddamn adult getting paid to do this shit, he'll learn to live with having a new partner. Now bang your dead partner's grieving daughter. BANG YOUR PARTNER. Why is everyone in this show unlikable? The real surprise is she's not creepy and weird like her creepy weird dad. Her friend is definitely about to die. I admit, the show is more bearable when the main character fucks off for most of the episode. Hunter- If this goes bad I'm blaming Hisoka. Please save my adorable children. Ouch, chain right to the tits. The answer is they're too soft to let this stupid guy with an ugly face tattoo die. Maybe we'll luck out and they'll all just kill each other. My adorable children don't fuck around here. Gotta agree, "we all die" is probably the worst case scenario for them. Don't throw that phone! Please kill Hisoka, regardless of how things turn out. GODDAMMIT HISOKA YOU'RE THE WORST. This is going too well something bad's about to happen. Please don't make Hisoka look attractive, it creeps me out. Suck it, clown. That all went surprisingly well. Ssssh don't say that let's pretend it's the end and nothing bad is about to happen. Sure, go ahead and let her shoot you in the face. Whelp so much for the tits. Aw crap Kurapika's dying now. Oh right, they were looking for that video game. Oh my god they look so cute in those little tuxes that's adorable. Fuck these guys. I guess this was a good ending? Lupin- Hey Jigen whatcha up to. Aw crap what did you do? Oh hey this doctor's cute. Yeah that's a great idea just stick your gun in the doctor's face. He must be in pain to hand over his gun. Bang that doctor, Jigen. Hey thanks old man. I like this old guy. Oh that can't be a good thing. Alright Jigen go kill the gangster for the cute doctor. Shut your mouth, Shaggy. Oh this isn't gonna be a good thing. I bet the old guy took it. GRANDPA NO. Go save grandpa and bang that doctor. Oh no doctor. OH NO GRANDPA. You touch Jigen's gun, you better be ready to die. God damn he's cool. Don't fuck with Jigen. Eat shit, douchewad. Zenigata is always right. Wait no go back and bang that doctor. Naruto- I'm also fighting pain just trying to get through this show. Hinata could do so much better. Okay frogs but you can't be embarrassed if you're dead. The answer is because he sucks. Punch him I like watching him get punched. Naruto doing what he does best, failing at things. Eww now he's a gross weird frog thing. Puppets usually are pain-inducing, yes. Oh no frog just got shanked. You're a frog, do frogs even have bones? I do like watching Naruto get stabbed. Oh right, that guy was part of this show. I'm pretty sure he's just doing this because he's a dick. Oh my god shut up I don't care. Dude's looking rough.

I mean...you're not wrong. Sexy grandpa Joseph leading a whole squad of buff dudes, sign me the fuck up.

How can one person be so wrong?

Titan- Whelp, everyone's dead. His mom wasn't exactly a looker back in the day either. Is there anyone in this show who's not a goddamn titan? I would also do almost anything for an adorable lesbian. Well, your best odds of getting laid probably are with the other shape-shifting monster. Do not trust Eren for a second. GODDAMMIT EREN. Okay watching a handless amputee punch a guy twice his size is kind of hilarious. This probably should not be as funny as I find it. I guess titan people are immortal then. You better believe that Captain America broke out the horse elevator for this. JUST LET THE LESBIANS BE HAPPY. Oh good, because what we needed was another goddamn flashback. Oh this is not gonna be a happy backstory. Well that was fucked up. Sasha is still best girl. Lesbian has really grown on me. No shit that's the scream of a titan what the hell else would it be. What's that Lassie, Timmy fell down the well? Silly lesbian that's not the kind of eating you do! Whelp that guy's definitely about to die. Ghoul- Got a bad feeling that bike kid here is about to die painfully. Didn't know that dude had a fake arm. Don't fight you're both terrible. Please just kill Hisoka. I continue to hate everyone here. Who the fuck designs armor like that? So not only did they completely fail to save him, but half of them are definitely going to die and they accomplished absolutely nothing. Who am I supposed to root for in a fight when they're all terrible? Banjo Dandy is the worst Dandy. Please just kill Hisoka, he's going to eat you. So then, literally no side benefited from this fight at all. If the small child is within debris range of the fight, she was too fucking close to the fight to begin with. What the fuck why is there a juggalo here. No seriously, what was the point of this fight? Yeah yeah he's all dark and brooding now we get it. Christ this music is right out of my moody cringe playlist from when I was 14. Hunter- I liked that guy and his dogs, show! Whelp cat's out of the bag now. Please don't kill my adorable children. Oh hey hot idiot. That was surprisingly smart of him. That song sure sounds familiar. Kick that guy in the dick. Quick, both of you think about your unresolved family issues. Kick her right in the tits! Well this went to hell in a hurry. The plot thickens. Mole girl is the best and I love her. That's a great wig. Kurapika will not hesitate to kill a bitch. You don't have to kill him but you can always break a couple of ribs. Answer the question before you ask your own it's only fair. Don't fuck with Kurapika, dude. Sorry boss but your friends are too loyal to let you die. Yesss, all of you fight and kill each other. Killua's not gonna help you, dick. Hisoka is having a great day. GET OUT OF HERE, ILLUMI. Lupin- I love her. Hey Jigen whatcha up to? Oh this can't be good. That guy's pretty. Jigen's not having a good day. They took his hat AND they're electrocuting him that's just cruel. You can show me a good time instead, sweetie. Hey Fuji how you doing baby. Fuji what kind of amazing wedding gift did you give him, a statue of your own boobs? I would also kill for great jewelry. Good luck there, Lupin. Let the man smoke. Aw crap he can do the Matrix shit you're screwed. Just give him the necklace and cut your losses. Good job you didn't die. It makes me really happy to see Lupin and Jigen be best friends. He's right behind you. So technically he's Batman. EAT CHAIR, MOTHERFUCKER. Dude have you seen Fujiko's tits I'd die for those too. You're afraid of fireworks, what are you a cocker spaniel? That's brilliant. Sorry buddy you're never gonna get divorced. GET IT LUPIN. The plot, it thickens. Naruto- Both of you just kill each other. And then he threw a giant fidget spinner at them. Hey giant slug maybe you could heal his wounded leg. If you know they multiply when you cut them stop cutting them. Naruto, continuing his long tradition of sucking and failing. I don't know why you're doing that but it sounds funny so go for it. I am disappointed that he wasn't crushed by a giant frog. Just hit him with your giant scroll. I'm genuinely surprised he knows what 2x2 is. I feel like that's cheating. Sorry, the fat one ate your fidget spinner. You're not Saitama, one punch isn't enough to take him out. God Naruto you suck. Oh hey he actually did something useful I'm impressed. Some wizard ninja bullshit, don't worry about it. The obvious answer is just to let him nuke the town again. At least the giant falling toads won't do any damage, because the town's already fucking destroyed.

DOES THAT MEAN MORE CHARLES AND RAY BECAUSE OH BOY

Actually, yeah. He was a helper for years on the original boards back when helpers actually did things.

Do you really count in that list when you don't seem to do anything?

Your link didn't work. "I'm afraid this may get a little bit rough." Jesus Christ, I'm gonna fuck him.

Here's the promo "I'm afraid this may get a little bit rough." Jesus Christ I am into that.

Titan- Glasses girl is the best. Now kick him while he has no arms. Eren you dumb fuck that's not gonna work. Lesbian is as annoyed with this show as I am. Everyone here can suck it, just let her go back to her girlfriend. I will eat my hat if Eren can keep his emotions in check for three entire minutes. Dude Eren is dumb as shit and you're lucky he hasn't gotten himself killed yet. Water is for the weak, obviously. What the hell are you talking about, dude? Lesbian is gonna kill you if you keep talking about her girlfriend. This guy may have some issues. Jekyll and Hyde, blah blah blah we get it. YOU BROKE MY MOM, ASSHOLE. Eren you're a psychotic little asshole yourself, careful where you're throwing stones here. Lesbian has had enough of this bullshit and I respect that. Bigfoot Titan creeps me out. Nothing says trust like kidnapping an unconscious amputee. Save your girlfriend! He's got a point, I would not trust Eren with a sack of potatoes. Oh hey her hand's back. Ghoul- This kid is the fucking worst. If I was this cannibal bitch I'd be mad that my organs wound up in such a terrible main character. I hate this show and I hate myself for watching twelve episodes of it. Or, you'll turn into the worst zombie ever and get gratuitously tortured for a sad excuse at entertainment. GET THAT THING THE FUCK OFF MY SCREEN. Yes, this is all bad. Yeah just keep piling up that angst and suffering, I'm still not gonna feel anything. His friend and the little girl are the only good characters. Kill them both and save them from having to be in this show anymore. Oh my god you whiny bitch how did we get saddled with you as our protagonist. She's got a point, kid's been dumb as shit from the beginning. Whenever I'm in trouble, I always have a deep philosophical conversation with the murderous bitch of an imaginary friend that lives in my brain. This just reminds me that I'm terrible at math. How many people ended up dying because Kaneki kept being a whiny little bitch for a dozen episodes instead of figuring his shit out until now? Hunter- Please don't hurt Killua I love him. Kurapika makes a pretty girl. Poor haiku dude. To be fair if I had psychic powers I would totally use them to make tons of money. Look with your special eyes! Hey weren't you all supposed to stay in one place to avoid getting killed? Aw crap he took all the boobs with him. Hi mole girl! I love mole girl she's the best. Eat that sandwich faster! Please don't get caught, mole girl. Hi dogs! Get it, dog guy. THAT'S NOT ROOM SERVICE. Room service dog. Okay I really like this dude now I hope he doesn't die. Save those dogs at all costs. Noooo leave the eyes! Oh this can't be a good thing. CAR DOGS. Killua is having a rough day. Oh no this isn't gonna go well. Please don't take my adorable children. Kick him in the dick and run! I know this is Kurapika's fault but I'm still gonna find a way to blame Hisoka. Please let this guy and his dogs live. At least the dogs are safe. Oh you bitch. WHY CAN'T I HAVE NICE THINGS, SHOW? Lupin- And then drugs. Meanwhile, soccer. You owe me the Lupin song, damn it! Hey look it's your wife. Hey Goemon whatcha up to? Wow this guy is gay. Hiiiiiii Fujiko. These voices are cracking me up. Y'all steal the evidence while Fujij bangs the soccer star. Soccer man's having a rough night. Drugs are bad, kids. Are you saying he showed you his dick? He will give you one dollar. I too would do anything for Fujiko's boobs. Just off camera, Joseph Joestar is screaming about squid pasta. I'm sure it's just a coincidence that he's buying the team. Whoever makes those super realistic masks in this show must be filthy rich. This is totally not suspicious. He sounds like Big Gay Al from South Park. This seems like it was too easy. I love seeing Goemon cut stuff. "You gotta smash them! Do it harder!" is great advice in life. Aw shit he's got a grenade. He was a spy all along. Not drunk, just blind. Well that's depressing. I am less athletic than a blind guy. You're rich! A happy ending for everyone. Naruto- I'd still choose the nuke over the giant slug. Gotta admit, that eyeshadow is better than mine. Good job you're too late and everyone's dead. The entire village is destroyed but don't worry, Mt Rushmore over there is perfectly fine. That is too many massive slugs for my comfort. Is that one lady dead or what. Oh hey Kakashi. Heyyyy hot dog mom. Hinata, continuing to be much too good for Naruto. No big deal, legs are for the weak. Whelp 200 fully trained ninjas just got their asses kicked fighting like six guys but I'm sure this single teenage moron is gonna do great on his own. It's two characters I dislike, who am I supposed to root for. I hate those giant frogs. The smaller slug is much less terrible. Okay rooting for the Hell Rhino here. Just hit that one right in the dick. Bring out that giant lobster, that thing cracks me up. This is not gonna work.

The slot was probably only intended for Jack the entire time, and we'll probably lose it after the rerun finishes regardless of how the ratings are. It just doesn't seem worth getting worked up about.

Titan- And then everyone died. It's making giant tracks, just follow it. I respect this drunk old guy. Dude always just assume that something's gone very wrong. Levi continues to hate everything. Give Sasha some snacks she's earned it. How many titans are in this squad I think we're at five or six now. Never turn down free food. Oh good another flashback, because this season didn't have enough of those already. Reminder that Eren's always been a fucking psychopath. Don't fuck with Mikasa. Okay "if the shoe fits, shove it up your ass!" is actually a great line and I applaud this random street vendor. And then Mikasa lost her goddamn mind. HEY BENNY, LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE RIVER. Alright the idea of them lifting the horses over the wall with a makeshift elevator is kind of hilarious. Just cut your loses, you're better without him. So basically Eren's always been a pain in the ass. I'm just rooting for the lesbians here. HORSE ELEVATOR. Oh fuck his arms. Ghoul- Is it too much to hope that everyone except the little girl kills each other? If Hisoka's your best hope, you're gonna have a bad time. He definitely sucked his own dick. Shouldn't you be playing Stuck in the Middle with You on the radio right now? OW FUCK THAT'S PAINFUL. This is terrible to watch. Avoiding the issue of her dying to spare this guy's feelings still seems like it was stupid. Where's the chick with the boobs is she coming too? It feels like this show wants to do Deadman Wonderland's gratuitous violence but completely missed the fact that Deadman Wonderland was actually fun to watch. OH FUCK IT'S A CENTIPEDE this is just gross and I'm gonna go throw up. Use Hisoka as a meat shield. Come on guys, die harder! Didn't they do this raid thing in Parasyte and it was exactly when the show went downhill? Maybe instead of making vague promises to get him out eventually at some point when it's convenient, they could try getting him out before the next round of gratuitous torture. Great idea, bring the small child to the murder battle building. Toucan Dick here, being creepy and terrible as always. Everyone is still terrible. Why would you keep the same easily-identified mask after you wore it when you killed someone and can be easily identified by it? I hope that monster is here to kill everyone. Hunter- KILL THE CLOWN. Enough of your cryptic riddles, clown man! Can you tell them anything at all, you six-piece chicken McNothing? Good job Kurapika you got one over the clown man. Oh I'm sure Hisoka's got something in him. I'm so uncomfortable. Yes, he's definitely forced and not doing it out of his own sick enjoyment. Please kick him out off the hideout so he dies. Yeah I'm sure you got a lot of dicks to suck before you die, you creepy bastard. I forgot why you're here. These kids are adorable and I love them. Something's about to go very wrong for your group. Hi doggies! Kurapika needs a hug. Hot dork is useless, thank god he doesn't have a serious job. Good luck Gon you're gonna need it. Do not let Hisoka near that child. Gon you sweet precious idiot what are you doing. I don't really understand this but okay. So basically Kurapika is overpowered as fuck. Oh god they were behind the couch the whole time. Awww, time for a group hug! Does Killua know that his sexy dad and half his family was in town? Keep the boobs together. Do not let Hisoka near these kids. At least get that boy an umbrella. Lupin- I missed all of you! Damn Lupin you did well for yourself. Wait a damn minute where is my Lupin theme this is bullshit. Zeni that's just rude don't break up the wedding. Okay I kinda love her. Hiiiii Fuji I missed you and your boobs the most. This bitch has great fashion sense. Oh come on Jigen, even you? Don't worry Fuji you'll always have me. Oh she makes things hard alright. I'm not an engineer but I don't think that jet looks functional. This is going too well for him. Sorry Lupin no sex for you tonight. It's nice to know that Zeni is a universal constant. I love these idiots. That is a nice crown. You fools, the crown is already stolen. Goddammit Fuji. Quick, distract them with boobs! Yeah she did terrible things but DAMN those boobs. This sure seems fishy. Damn that was a good disguise. She's fun I like her. Oh hey, the jet works. Bitches be crazy, Lupin. WHERE IS THE THEME SONG YOU BASTARDS. Naruto- GIANT EYEPATCH DOG, I LOVE HIM. Okay kinda gay for dog boy's cool mom here. Really, you couldn't figure that out from the neon orange hair and the evil uniform cloak? I'd rather just die than get felt up by a giant slug. If she's paper the obvious answer is to set her on fire. Okay scratch that, how the hell are paper bombs supposed to work. Shit bro I'd pay you to take him away. I have a bad feeling about this entire show, lady. He may be stronger but he's also way stupider than you could possibly imagine. If you were gonna leave a secret code anyway you could have been less cryptic in the actual message. Use Ino as a shield! I'm still rooting for DEATH LOBSTER here. Y'all could have just told him any random location and sent them off for a couple hours. Oh believe me buddy I know pain every single week I watch this show. What kind of magic ninja fog gets killed so easily? Hey Sakura maybe you shouldn't have wasted your chakra healing some dumb kid's scraped knee. Hey magic healing slug, maybe do your gross magic on the comatose lady. Good job just standing there watching the carnage and not telling anyone at all, granny frog. And then he dropped the nuke. I think he's a little late to do much good fo the town at this point. He returns, looking uglier than usual.

He was supposed to play Spike in the live action movie that never got made like a decade ago.

I mean, didn't we only get the slot because of Jack? (Genuinely asking, I don't remember that far back.) I wouldn't be surprised if AS told them to either use the slot for something they own outright or not at all, which would limit them to Jack and...half of Big O, I guess? Sidenote, give Big O the end rerun slot next.

I think not celebrating it at all, because it's half a week removed from the actual holiday, would have beena better option. I definitely don't have plans, because Sunday will likely be the only day I get off that week.

But they're going out of their way to not tell people that she's dead when they flat out ask where she is. "She got crushed by a pipe and I got her liver" isn't a fun conversation, but these are folks who kill and eat people when there are other options; they can handle some bad news. This "oh, she's...not here anymore" misunderstanding crap is bad and the show should feel bad for doing it.