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UnevenEdge

Doom Metal Alchemist

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Everything posted by Doom Metal Alchemist

  1. Doom Metal Alchemist
  2. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Thanks guys
  3. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Thinks the only good Beatles song is Revolution 9.
  4. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Met his favorite porn star in a bar. He opened a bottle of beer with her breasts. She then slapped him. She was still willing to take a selfie with him though.
  5. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Happy birthday!
  6. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Was the one who got Rush Limbaugh his own radio show. Regrets nothing.
  7. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Dentist visits are always so unpleasant.... and yet life would be infinitely worse without them.
  8. Doom Metal Alchemist
  9. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Only uses real card decks for solitaire, calls people who use computer/mobile solitaire apps "posers."
  10. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Refuses to eat any Asian food with chopsticks, but insists on eating steak and potatoes with chopsticks.
  11. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Eats soup with a fork
  12. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Pitched "a show about nothing" to NBC.
  13. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Is the Jerry to my Newman.
  14. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Has modeled his life after George Costanza.
  15. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Thinks anything that dissolves in milk is funny.
  16. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Swears up and down that Metal Magic is the best Pantera album. Is absolutely willing to die on this hill.
  17. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Was the ghostwriter for World Domination For Dummies.
  18. Doom Metal Alchemist
  19. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Stupid Elmer Fuddisms aside, I liked how he flubbed his line and they didn't even have him redo it.
  20. Doom Metal Alchemist
    WTF am I the only one that thinks Zero is deserving of a much more badass voice than that goofy ass shit he got stuck with?
  21. Doom Metal Alchemist
    The phrase "make you feel my love" sounds a little rapey...
  22. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Got his hair cut like Mr. T and plays kids' birthday parties as Bizarro Mr. T.
  23. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Buy peanut butter ice cream for that urge so you'll save your actual peanut butter for your sandwiches. Or maybe buy jelly and have jelly sandwiches instead.
  24. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Family Guy single-handedly made me hate that song.
  25. Doom Metal Alchemist
    Or your Freddy from Scooby Doo cosplay.
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