Mix

Y'know I saw everyone talking about this lady on twitter and I can't find her in Trump's administration. Why is she a bitch?

wait for it just give it a sec

I'm making a tasteful xxx version of Jack and the Beanstalk. I need an open minded Cau......and I mean open as fuck you in?

You, eh, wanna make some money

Happy birthday Good timing

Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy Was he

...

if it can be transplanted, they'll steal it

This guy in a black duster walks up and tells me to choose the red pill or the blue pill. I wake up in a bathtub at a run down apartment complex in midtown. I guess my liver was The One.

I couldn't tell by your description

it's good to hear that it all worked out

teach these fools

It's real. And it's spectacular.

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead - Tom Stoppard 11 to go... Doing everything at the last minute. If I start smoking in the bathroom it's basically like i'm back in school.

Excellent! 😈 And this works out great for you 'cause your nephew is already a client and is pretty far along in his studies so he'll be able to tutor you.

For you, the friends and family price......half your soul Fun fact: just paying the price of admission makes you more evil....also you won't be able to taste oranges, idk why

Why thank you for asking...btw, you don't even have to change your name if you become evil Now, it can allow for deviation based on ones personal brand of evil, but nothing quite beats the age old, tried and true, swimming in blood (preferably of your enemies). Now there's always children's tears, Lazarus pit, lake of lost souls, and so on, but, like I said earlier, it's all about personal branding at that point

yeah, I saw your joke and I made it better

I'm keepin' an eye on you

That's not how evil saluts

what, Krooonk? I'm, at minimum, Drakken levels of evil

don't tell me what to do