Mix

PSST, my wife doesn't want me to drink, so i'm going to ask for a water, but what I really want is vodka in a water glass... Yeah, i'll have a glass of water too

It's just one of the many unwritten rules of social media

@Phillies Just hold on one second @Phillies I've got just the guy for you @Phillies He'll be right in @Phillies any second now @Phillies this is embarrassing, i don't know what's taking him

maybe......show something else, idk

They put an asterisk by your name if you fail a drug test for a "performance enhancing drug" There are white guys in the NBA hall of fame who never played against black guys If that's not performance enhancing, I don't know what is

Think about how many times you've heard someone ask, "who let the dogs out?"

Nonsense, we came here to find the american dream. Now that we're right in the vortex, you wanna quit! You must realize we found the main nerve!

I would prefer you give me a very fast car with no top, cocaine, a tape recorder for special music, and Acapulco shirts. Get me out of LA for at least forty eight hours. Blows your weekend because naturally you're going to have to come with me.

Watch it with me

I'm pretty heavily invested

💎💎💎🔥

look, like.....I know, ok..................but my vision is like wayyy better now and you can't argue with results

Oh no, this doesn't apply to you you can have 'em all, baby cakes

I can't afford both. oh, and cable. Rent, dignity, or cable. Can't afford all three. what? SHELTER AND ENTERTAINMENT ARE ALL THAT MATTER!!! YOU CAN BLOCK EVERYTHING ELSE OUT WITH THE RIGHT COMBINATION OF DRUGS AND THERAPY!!! SHIT! OK, THIS IS THE LAST TIME! RENT, DIGNITY, CABLE, DRUGS, OR THERAPY!!! I CAN'T AFFORD THEM ALL!!! THIS JOKE IS STARTING TO NOT BE A JOKE!!!!!

Happy birthday

If you too have never seen this movie, please offer your takes on what is happening here. I always wondered why they were cheering her on for going to pound out a quickie during her lunch break, but never cared enough to look it up

Happy birthday

why? i'm learning a lot Brad Pitt's stock has plummeted Martha Stewart's stock has never been higher Model trophy wives of millionaires are women "YOU" can get and I'm not the only one who thinks Danny Devito's working with a lil sumn sumn

Out with the old, in with the new I here ya, Vamped

...but they never adapted to being clubbed over the head. The old ways are the best ways. This message brought to you by The RNC and Conservatives of America. We're not racists, they just vote for us almost exclusively for some reason. Also Blockbuster video. Blockbuster, we're still here, we're just biding our time.