Insipid

04-28-2005 05:14 PM EST (I was literally 12. Now you can calculate my age )

masturbating in the mop closet

I imagine KN developed this. Nice job. This old format style has really lost its charm, to be honest.

(This video is now 16 years old. Time to feel ancient.)

I really don't miss this piss yellow color. Can you change my color to poop brown as Member? I never received my custom rank color for the donations. Plus, I've been relatively behaved this time. Or not. Whatever.

I kept my new year's resolution of taking better care of my body. I quit nicotine in January, unfortunately gained 20 pounds into March, and as of this day I have lost those 20 pounds. Now starts the longer journey of getting into shape.

horseshoe crab blood is a highly prized commodity these days. Missed an opportunity to make a few hundred bucks, lol

I went to Ikea today and bought Kalles, a Swedish favorite. It's a fish paste that looks like it comes out of a giant toothpaste tube. I ate it with a cripsy rye bread they also sold. It wasn't that bad. It reminded me of shrimp-flavored Japanese rice crackers.

It just so happens to be the sea that separates the "Asian" part of Egypt from the African part, lawl Whether or not you believe the story, the fact of the matter is that Moses is an important prophet in three major religions. Also, I just learned that the Sinai Peninsula has been claimed by Egypt since antiquity. Stoned can't claim shifting geopolitics, fitting more into your argument. That was really stupid on his part, as I never heard anyone even jokingly saying Cleopatra was Asian. That's like saying Putin is Asian because you know enough about geography that most of Russia is in Asia.

Well akchually, there's Mt. Sinai and the story of Moses, particularly the part where he receives the Ten Commandments.

Uh oh, you done it now. 🍿🍿🍿

Verdauungsspaziergang. German for a walk you take after eating, supposedly one of the best things you can do to avoid insulin resistance or diabetes, especially after a large meal.

I dunno how to feel about sour beer. I've only had sour 4loko and I thought it was nasty af.

Maybe you should start creating react videos. Seems to be your thing, and you also like Mystery Space Theater.

I've always wanted to try that beer. It reminds me of Golden Monkey by Victory Brew, one of my favorites.

Karen Carpenter's BMI was once below 15. 😢

Oh my . . . military hottie supposedly has super special black ops access to telecommunications. Godspeed.

Nah, my white grandmother's name is Karen. She's a total cunt that no one really likes. Goes well beyond the meme, honestly. I almost feel bad just how awful she is.

Yet another Norfolk Southern train has derailed in the area. Geez, sounds like there's a serious problem with the company. 🙃

I'm glad you seem to find my sense of humor to be a barometer of fuckery.

Fortunately for you, I am a certified armchair gynecologist. I'll get my scalpel and speculum. Free of charge, since I believe in universal healthcare.

I bought a food scale and have been measuring many things I eat. Today, I measured one serving of cooked pasta (approximately 200 grams), which I always thought was so small. Well, it really wasn't that small. It honestly made me a bit happy.

Do you like wonton? Deciding between the two is always a hard choice for me when I eat Chinese.

Eh, hubbb knew what he was talking about.