SwimModSponges

I told this one to my girlfriend last night (first draft, workshopped it a lot, it rambled on at first) and she got legit mad over the qualitu of the joke.

Its because they often cross timezones as a result of their migration; they actually perciev more time than do civilizations that stay in one place. I guess its true what they say: Time waits for nomads.

Its not just one day: its almost all of them.

Every day at 11 am we have a siren go off. The folks who live here are used to it, but its fun being in like, the farmers market for a festival or something when it goes off and all the people from elswhere start freaking out.

If not indiana jones, who else should we aspire to be?

about a pit trap? Never. Pit traps are serious business.

What if its warning about a pit trap ahead? I bet you'd prefer a message about that to none.

What about girlfrinds' excess?

Well obviosly if youre carving a message into a wall youre probably not going to be focused on the penmanship.

And duct tape solves all problems.

You can use it to carve stuff into a wall if you need to write something on a wall and you dont have a pencil.

If it makes tou feel any better; just remember that your life and the entirety of your perception of it is just an infinitely small portion of a massive chemical reaction that began billions of years ago, will continue for billions more, and is only now, momentarily, coming together to form yourself. Time is not malleable; you can change the future no more than you can change the past. Rest assured that only the things that are to occur will happen.

It wasnt very impressive. Literally a front-butt.

Cant be any worse than the darkness which sits at the heart of all beings, right?

Contest ends tomorrow yall. Make sure to enter.

The other half could be solved with a nail. ... Think that one over for a bit, pretty sure its a deep thought. Sounded deep at least.

Tried that a few weeks back. Bacon got too crispy and the burgers did not turn out as well as i had hoped.

You're over half way there. You can do it!

Eh... I mean some of the stuff has held up pretty well; Tool is still a pretty good band, but I'm not obsessed with them like I was. For the most part no though; after high school and around my early 20's my tastes kind of refined into more obscure versions of the more mainstream things I had been listening to. Then into my mid to late 20s, I kind of let go of the "fetishization" of my particular tastes, branched out into other slightly obscure genres, finally I'm mostly just "fuck it, listen to the work radio, get happy when there's a halfway decent song on."

Oh yeah that's right. Well at least the majority of my worst posts are hidden.

Im not sure, but i should go to dumpster fires and post several more just in case.

I know right? Man, they are not going to be able to look me in the eye soon here. She's like "i couldnt find the website, so i found you on there and went through your posts" And im like "theres some weird shit in there."

You didnt get a chance to see her beef drapes?