Top Gun

It's comforting that there are people making tens of millions of dollars a year to sit at their desks and be complete and total fuck-ups 7 days a week. Oh wait no, not "comforting," the exact opposite word.

So I want to put aside the stupidity of that match for a moment. ("Why did I pass?" Because the dude was open and you wanted to score, you dumb shit?) I was laughing so hard when they were whining on and on about "oh, Japanese people don't have the personality traits to win a World Cup!" Like, you motherfuckers do realize that the Japanese women's national team actually won a World Cup in 2011, right? So explain all your nonsense rhetoric to me. Still, at least the assholes were actually wearing shoes for once.

So like...Quincies are normal humans with powers, right? Then how the hell are these guys still alive? Because they apparently grew up in medieval-Europe-but-there-are-Nazis-for-some-reason.

"Hear that squawk? Here comes the cock!" Show hasn't even started yet and I already love it.

Cat is the goddamn best and Sungwon is having an absolute blast voicing him. No, nothing was retconned. You'll have to wait for the obligatory One Piece Tragic Backstory to see how things went down.

Goddamn that was badass.

I've seen a few people mention that both the original manga's writer and artist were known for working on horror-themed series before this one. For this series they basically created a death game story with a coat of soccer paint on top. But man, I cannot remember being less enthused after the first two episodes of a series since...maybe ever? Like, are we supposed to be rooting for this protagonist? Because so far he seems like a complete psychopath. He already knocked out the only remotely-sane person in this place (although with that crazy eyes look I guarantee you that one comes back later as an unhinged antagonist), and none of the rest of these nutjobs are remotely likeable so far. As for the "sports" part, I don't even enjoy soccer, much less watch it, and I'm still rolling my eyes back into my head at the nonsense that dimestore Steve Jobs is spouting. Sure, pour all your resources into developing a single incredibly selfish player in large team sport and see how that goes for you. And put some motherfucking shoes on you weirdos.

Beginning and ending with giant cock. Double penetration?

Yeah, I loved the shit out of Erased, which has a very similar overall premise to this show, and that didn't put any real effort into explaining the hows or whys of its central time-travel mechanic. And then there was the criminally under-promoted Summertime Rendering, which did have some more specific constraints on its time travel but played with them for the sake of increasing tension and drama. Either of those shows would have been awesome to have on the block.

Have no fear, we've got stories for years!

The real mindscrew would be if it was some sort of closed-loop situation, and the brother was the one who shoved him in the first place in order to trigger the time travel that saved his life in the first place. In any event I'm fine with not thinking too hard about the mechanics if the show is fun. Our protagonist is a good kid (if not a supreme dumbass), and it's a rare thing for modern anime to take on that classic "yanki" vibe.

You have no idea. There's a reason the phrase "hot dog down a highway tunnel" was invented.

I wasn't sure what to think about zombie Spear at the start of this but Genndy is fucking cooking.

Hey my 6 multiple personalities and I are having a great time.

I'm sure the 7 people watching at that time will be very disappointed.

Drink up me hearties, yo ho.

That was a fun start. Our protagonist seems like a good kid. Apropos of nothing, but if you haven't watched or read Erased, add that to your list.

Dude, say what you will about soccer but the one thing it doesn't is go on for hours. Minus a bit of extra time bullshit it's on a fixed clock like no other timed sport is. Also you shut your mouth, curling kicks ass. Anyways, that was...um...a show all right. I don't know what to make of this yet but that was not the most compelling first episode of all time.

Oda was hitting the good shit when he came up with Bege's fruit. Also that dub choice for Bege is amazing and I am here for it.

DON'T NOBODY UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMING OUT OF HIS FONT!

Jinkies!

"But he's a giant chicken!"

I wish I could like this twice.

Oh my God, I was wroooooong! It was Earth all alooooong!

Yukio is the actual fucking worst. I can't overemphasize how shitty his character arc is. He's turned into the budget Sasuke we have at home. Hell they'd probably have a competition to see who could fit the most dicks in one mouth.