EmpressAngel

Especially with your backlog of anime Christmas gifts to watch! 😈

Thank god I'm too poor to drop a bunch of money on anime. Rightstuf usually has some fun deals, I'll probably end up picking up a free shipping worth of goodies before it's over. @Top Gun get in here and confess your addiction to Black Friday cartoon sales.

Hero- Oh god there's an even bigger fanboy than Deku. This is how I'd prefer my house to look. I like that All Might stops to pose before saving the drowning child. DANG THIS STINGS. Did they just become best friends? Thanks for finally letting her out of the fetish wall. STAMP STAMP STAMP STAMP STAMP. Don't worry I have wronger feelings about that high school boy. Aim for the dick! You can do it kiddo I believe in you. Oh shit that's a cool quirk. OH SHIT. To be fair, Mirio is built like a brick wall and probably wouldn't break all his limbs throwing a punch. It's gonna suck later when you have to clean all those footprints off the ceiling. Nighteye you underestimate how bad of a teacher All Might actually is. WALL. Well the important thing is you tried. Awww he didn't wanna ruin the limited edition merch. Fanboys unite! He did it! Oh, that's just rude. Meanwhile, Bakugo is angry. Oh dang bird boy scored a good one. Yaaay Kirishima and the girls get to play too. Mineta is the worst. What is the point of Mirio even having a costume. Surely this will end well. I AM VERY CONCERNED FOR THIS ADORABLE CHILD. OPM- I got a bad feel about this. Nothing suspicious at all, move along. No, not dog guy! DOG GUY NO. I love this RoboDog. Hellooo Medusa. Always choose the quick and easy death. Oh no don't kill the kid. PIG GOD, GO. That sure was a thing that happened. Don't you look down on One Hit Dude. Armstrong did it better. Who the hell are you people? Oh hey, it's Bitchnado again. This is not exactly going well is it. You're a douche, random sword guy. I REALLY DON'T THINK Y'ALL SHOULD DO THAT. Aw shit too late. Meanwhile, good ol' kickfight. Don't be rude that's just how he looks. Saitama why didn't you tape that wig down from the start? He's just here for the cash. Try not to kill him too hard. Ouuuch. Just punch him already. Careful there Stain. Ohhh that serious face doesn't bode well for you. RIP wig. Oh shit he's buff. Boooooooooooo. Yes rip your clothes off more. Thank god his face can take some real punishment. Well he's not wrong. Ass too strong. Poor Saitama. Oh right, Genos is there. Dr Stone- Glasses really are great aren't they. Aw fuck glasses are against the rules. Suika honey you can't see for shit. YOU SON OF A BITCH. Oh hey, new OP is good. Now we gotta make her new glasses on top of all this. FISTICUFFS, GO. Hey there Kohaku. Aw shit science twink can't fight. AWWWWWW. Eat shit, Magma. Whelp, you're screwed. Kid's hopped up on meth, we're good to go. I love this idiot. Oh my god my sides. Oh hey, he won. And then he shit himself to death. Jesus christ. Sorry Senku you're going to die. Whelp, y'all better say goodbye to Ruri now. Remember, aim for his dick! Maybe you guys should just slip her the medicine while everyone's distracted. Oh shit it's that guy. POCKET SAND! Stab him in the dick with broken glass! Oh fuck he's stupid. Oh shit, he's not stupid! You still owe him a coke. These sure are numbers. You're not allowed to interfere, you'll get him disqualified! Ahahahaha fuck you Magma. Senku's faces are so much fun. Oh yeah you sure got us backed into a corner here. He's right, I'm lazy as fuck. YOU'RE DOING IT I'M SO PROUD. Stop drop and roll, bitch. RIGHT IN THE DICK. They did it they're gonna save her! Awww the ED is tiny Senku. Fire Force- CLANG CLANG CLANG CLANG CLANG. Aw fuck it's that lady. Someone get Arthur a new donkey dick. Save the angry buff dude. I hate this woman so much. Fucking magnets, how do they work. Oh, that's creepy. Not really a fan of the psychotic humping deer animatronic. Thanks for knocking her out. Take this as a reminder to never trust a Chuck E Cheese. Goddammit evil Deku. Oh, this actually kind of hurts. Dio wants his power back. Whelp, there goes Arthur. Get that flash drive out of your mouth. HONK HONK MOTHERFUCKER. The hell did you come from? Don't bring her she got your urchin killed. Run him over. Not this fucker again. Oh, urchin's still alive. Wouldn't it be fucked up if this was all fake and just a convoluted plan to get him to join the group? I hate her but she's got a point on not truting truck guy. Maki is my girlfriend. He did hurl a buch of cans at them. It's amazing how much better the show was without Tamaki. He's clearly the best waifu here. "It's a little bit better than usual" is a good description, actually. One last beer for the road. Take that sweetass giant skull with you. OH FUCK YEAH THEY BROUGHT THE SKULL. Captain has turned into the cool dad and I approve. Food Wars- Fuck off, Megumi. Just spike it with meth and call it a day. Meanwhile, that one weirdo is giving himself skin cancer in his taint. Seriously just let her fail. I hate everyone. Wow that kid got fat. I don't care about this girl, show. Is anybody really looking down on her because of her gender though? Is it too much to hope that Megumi's bus goes off a cliff? Oh what in the fuck. Holy shit, Erina actually showing a shred of human decency to another person? Goddammit she survives. HOWDY Y'ALL. Does he sleep with a giant sriracha pillow? Curry guy is less terrible than the others, so therefore he won't win. I hate all of you. What the hell diet are you on? Fail them all, grandpa. HE WAS NUMBER ONE, MR KRABS. Gee I wonder if Soma's gonna end up in the top spot. Hey there hot lady. I hate everything. I continue to not hate the bros. Nothing says feminism like gratuitous jiggling. I agree with the sexual predator lady, Megumi is terrible. Oh, he actually has a personality? The fuck is that shit, black tar heroin? I truly forget that one kid exists when he's not directly in front of me. Of course it's time to stop and suck Soma's dick. I'm not lucky enough to see him fail. Demon Slayer- I love my angry muzzle daughter. She's still adorable though! No don't go in there it'll kill you. Maybe you should have taken the giant box off your torso first. KICK HIS ASS. Did your win or is this like a hydra thing where all the heads just spawn more heads? And then he drowned. Nezuko is just the best. MY BABY. Okay "hands off" was a great pun right there. Fuck you, demon. Fuck you, other demon. Awww she needs a nap. That guy's having a real rough day. Tanjiro is such a good kid. Give that guy a hug. CAW. Looks like Tokoyami's internship is going well. You okay there, googly-eyed Tanjiro? Awww sleepy Nezuko. NO THE UDON. Oh no don't leave her alone there. OH SHIT IT'S HIM. Why does he look like a bad Michael Jackson cosplayer? OH FUCK. THE PLOT, IT TWISTS. Oh you son of a bitch. Black Clover- Show you promised me Yami fighting now give me Yami fighting. At least if the nun dies, she doesn't have to deal with Asta anymore. At least if the little girl dies she doesn't have to deal with her creepy fuck brother anymore. Please kill the sister fucker. No really what the hell is this. Yami, continuing to give zero fucks. Start killing things for my amusement. sexy. God I'm into this. Is everyone in this fucking town a dead elf? Please scream at me, Yami. You can let some of these rich schmucks die. All problems in this show should be solved by just letting Yami slice things up. Oh great, the insufferable lesbian is here. You can go ahead and kill her if you want. Wow what a shock, you're terrible at this. YEET. I'm kinda into this. This show's so bad I have no fear of my curse killing him. Jojo- Yeah, stand users are known for dressing like ordinary citizens. Look at these mafia men, dressing like normal people. These dudes fat-shaming Polpo's corpse is unreasonably funny to me. I don't know how much money that is in American. That boy's suit looks like moldy swiss cheese and it makes me physically angry. What's wrong with cake? You'll get that math next time, kiddo. This pissy goth guy doesn't care about cursing himself. Oh my god. Stop fighting, mom's home. Hey goth what the fuck. The neighborhood grannies love Bruno. GIORNO NO. You're all grounded. Ohhhh that's nasty. Jellyfish. Correction, everyone loves Bruno. Don't do drugs, kids. Oh sweet, we get a yacht. Pick #4. Idiot boy has the right idea. Turn that shit down, kiddo. Mista no. "Son of a shitter" this dub is a gift. I'm just gonna assume that's a ton of money. They're all happy for their boss, that's sweet. No not my idiot son I just got that one! Aaaand there goes Mista. At least I don't have to see that goddamn cheese suit now. I like that this series of words actually makes perfect sense. They're in some kinda weird pocket dimension aren't they. Oooh what does Piss Goth do? I like that Abbacchio immediately hates Giorno for no discernible reason. Whelp that's it, show's over. God this music is a fucking banger. Lupin- Lupin's having a bad day. "Oh right, we're criminals too." And then Jigen was a furry. Somebody should give Goemon a good punch. Hiiiii Fujiko. I'd like to volunteer to guard Fuji. Kill your dad, Ami. Oh shit I forgot he pretended to be her dad. You piece of shit. You might wanna put a medic in that container with him. This is what, like the fourth traumatic gut injury he's had so far this season? Jigen have you considered just shaving. Oh hey, Albert! Poor Zeni and the cops. On the bright side you guys can be friends in about 40 years when he gets out. There's definitely going to be an ambush here. Hi Jigen! Let him finish his cigarette you jerks. WHAT A SURPRISE, IT WAS A TRAP. Use more gun. Goddamn he's cool. Maybe it is time to retire, but go save Fujiko first. Lupin your abdomen is carved open like a roast, can you just be chill for once. You guys might wanna get out of there before Pops kicks that door open. Oh hey, sword. Awwww Zeni threw the sword. God I'm gay for Fuji. AHAHAHAHA, EAT SHIT. That is actually a brilliant move, I was expecting them to just blow the place up. Sometimes you just gotta hide in a sewer and leak info on war crimes. Rebecca!

Honestly this is just what it looks like in my head 90% of the time.

I don't know who programmed that Hot Pockets commercial to play something like fifty times tonight, but I want them to know I hate them. Hero- I love Granpa. Fuck you and your creepy plague mask, buddy. I could watch United States of Smash for hours. I feel like this isn't gonna end well. Magne's pretty cool. Whelp, bye Magne. Bye Compress' arm. Bye Overhaul's redshirt. Meanwhile, Aizawa. Bakugo being angry. Emo Might. I'VE TO-GATA GO SEE! I love this wholesome motherfucker. God I wish that were me. Oh my god just call your ex. Awwwww my son. He's dumb as fuck but he's got a personality like a golden retriever. To be fair, it would be irresponsible to give me Vault Boy with All Might's powers and expect me to survive. Mineta continues to be the worst. Well it's good that he has a sense of humor. Helloooo underboob. That is definitely a sex thing. OH MY GOD. OPM- KICK HIS ASS. Or his face, that works too. Oh right there's monsters popping up everywhere. Genos is a good friend. I still love how that guy is just Dave. Genos doesn't fuck around. FACE. Dude he's metal you probably should leave his face alone. Aw shit that's a lot of down hereos. BUG MAN. Good job Sour Face. Try not to kill him too hard. Saitama please date me. Mr. Saynothin. Goddammit Deku. Just let the rich people die. He's a cockroach how fast can he actually move? GO GO GADGET GLUEGUN. Lt Dan you don't got no legs. Kinda rooting for the dominatrix here. Whelp, so much for Blizzard. False alarm, we're good. Sister team up, go! ...Or not I guess. I forgot how much of a bitch Tornado was. I don't like your odds here snake man. He's cute but I don't trust him at all. Mumen Rider is the best. Fancy Cat Monster! Aw shit. GENOS NO. Dr Stone- Dog! You've only got about 20 steps left in this 400 step process. He was doing that Salt Bae meme there. It's a bong! These sure are a bunch of words I don't understand. You gotta piss in a bottle. Calm down she's not an enemy on Jojo. Time for booze! Quick, get that boy some glassses. Those are some unreasonably lax rules. Senku no! I love these boys so much. Tonight's theme is apparently snaaaaakes. He finally gets to come in the village. Wait what. Stop hacking up a lung and tell me what's going on! Yes, shout about how you're going to murder her as soon as you marry her. GRAB HIS DICK AND TWIST IT! No such thing as a fair fight with science. AW FUCK. New plan, drugs! This fucking idiot. I love my melon child. Quick somebody kill that spy. You son of a bitch. GODDAMMIT. You should have tracked down Taiju and had him fight. Your eyes stiil shitty? Senku what the hell. MY BABY. Oh my god I love her. Give him your melon! Heeeeeee. THE EYES OF SCIENCE. This is goddamn incredible. Fire Force- Aww he brought them beer. YEET. Like dicks, dicks should ideally never break. I don't need a diatribute about his life's phiilosophy, just keep hurling beer cans at the main cast. Time for a good ol' murder-suicide plot. That's a lot of Klansmen out there. Was...was he facing the wrong way this entire time. In case you needed more proof to never trust a man in a plague mask. RIDE THE LIGHTNING, BITCH. Arthur you fucking idiot. RIP piss squirrel. He's stupid enough that a cape will help him. Okay that donkey dick got me. It works because he's literally just that stupid. DOUBLE DONKEY DICK. RIP donkey dick. I'd like to thank whoever was responsible for that "You can bust my poor ass" line. Aw shit y'all built that thing? FUCK. You betrayed me, boobs. Meanwhile I genuinely forgot how Shinra got captured. I hope the sex was good at least. I lost track of this bridge metaphor a lont time ago. Whelp, kid's dead. Surely she's not about to betray you because she's secretly loved them the whole time and now you've hurt her family. Enough with the bridge thing! Beat him into a concussion, that'll help him remember. Food Wars- Erina is still the fucking worst. Oh fucking christ Megumi passed somehow. Everyone is goddamn terrible. Hi new girl I hate you already. I don't even know what this tournament is supposed to be for. Did the bros pass? No really, why is she such an unlikable bitch? I'm with these guys, Megumi is fucking awful. No, Soma did all of that for her. Yep, he does everything for her and she just follows along like a confused rabbit. And then there's a crazy lesbian stalker. Just sitting around in the midle of the night polishing your blade. Put pants on you gross fuck. I miss you, hot dad. Nothing says talent like using your daddy's influence to garner special favors. Oh jesus christ there's two of them together. Scratch that, I can get on board with this. I don't care about this flasback. Your dad was a creep back in the day. Can this guy just be the main character instead, he seems a lot more tolerable. It seems like cheating to have the curry teacher's assistant playing in a round that's curry. Kick his ass, curry boy. I enjoy seeing Soma in pain. Follow your nose! Demon Slayer- DESTROY. Heee Nezuko burrito. Oh it's like Inuyasha's robe. Sorry kid you're doomed. I love my kids. Sister box! Awww I love the sister box. This is so sweet. It's daytime, she's probably sleeping. This guy's looking rough. Aw crap it's a demon bride thing isn't it. Don't mind me, just a weird kid sniffing the ground like a bloodhound. Someone hug this boy. Find his sister please. Whelp this girl's about to get kidnapped. Ewww it's a blob monster. Ohhhh that's a lot of slime. SCENT ACQUIRED. Fuck you, ground! You saved her, I'm so proud! Aw crap it's one of them super demons. It speaks in the language of nails on a chalkboard. You should let Nezuko out and let her help you. Aw shit you're looking for the Ultra Demon. That's a stupid name and I hate him. KICK HIS ASS, KIDDO. I'm serious just let Nezuko out. Oh, fuck you. Oh no I hope her bow's not there. OH NO. FUCK YEAH NEZUKO. I love my sleepy little demon daughter. Oh, I'm gonna cry. Hey thanks for that. YOU'RE DOING AMAZING, SWEETIE. Black Clover- The OPs for this show are deceptively decent. I continue to not care about any of this backstory. I'm honestly not sure if that's supposed to be Mimosa in a previous life or if the character design is just lazy. You're book twins now. SQUIRREL. And then they fucked. Somebody give the sex talk to that kid. Yeah I'm sure this will end well. Any time I go to a wedding I'm just in it for the cake. And then the Fire Nation attacked. Run away squirrel, you're the only one worth saving! Whelp, sorry about your dead bride and kid. Oh what the fuck is this. What is this bullshit? This sure is a thing that's happening. And nothing of value was lost. Yuno's just an elf now I guess. Jojo- I'll admit this stand looks cool as fuck. Hey maybe you'll get some cool time resetting powers if he stabs you. MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA. Well, that didn't work. Aw shit it's got shadow powers. And a short attention span, apparently. Oh hey Koichi. KOICHI GET OUT OF THE SHADOW. It's funny that Giorno's half-vampire but this thing is the one that dies in the sun. Well Koichi is is gonna be kind of a long story you might wanna just have a seat. Y'all might wanna call Jotaro about this. In general, fuck you, Polpo. Ohhh crap he's going through the bird shadows. Reverb's gotten a much nicer attitude over the last couple years. Just get Josuke on the next plane out, he can fix it. Fuck this tree in particular I guess. Oh that was a good idea. Giorno's theme is a fucking banger. I kinda miss our old hand pervert friend. Alright fatass where'd you go. The sheer cost of feeding him must be enough to bankrupt most countries. I don't respect you. Well hey at least you get a cool button out of it. Uh whatcha up to there Giorno? Oh hey Jotaro how you doin'? Koichi's earned some fun. BANANA GUN. Welcome to Olive Garden. They're all teenagers. Lupin- Hey there Goemon. Please go rescue Fujiko. The mascot suits. Oh hey Goemon. Awww no fair she put on clothes. Oh that's terrible. Aw fuck is Ami gonna turn out to be his long lost kid? RABBLE RABBLE TECHNOLOGY IS EVIL. Ami is the real MVP of this season. I don't understand all this computer talk either. Princess Fujiko is objectively the best princess. Goemon is angry. Oh my god you innocent child of a samurai man. Fish is serious business. I mean, it's kind of a little funny. Nah dude, y'all are friends. This is a trap don't fall for his bait. Goemon no don't feed the troll. Shut up, sidekick guy. That giant bird cage is giving me Sword Art PTSD war flashbacks but damn it works for her. Just fuck already. Oh hey Goemon. NOW'S NOT THE TIME, FRIEND. Try not to kill the girls during your pissing contest. Jigen just shoot him. YOU SHUT UP. Sometimes you just like a good old round of Fight Club between friends. Aw crap. Man Lupin's really getting the shit killed out of here this season. I know I called it but OH SHIT. I've lost my goddamn mind from the never-ending onslaught of Hot Pockets and I will never know peace again.

I think we've finally run out of Hot Pockets. I kind of miss them now.

It's fucking bizarre that the only show not getting spammed with Hot Pockets commercials was Food Wars of all things.

TWIST. THAT. DICK.

THIRTY PERCENT MORE CHEESE

I am 10 billion percent on board with this plan.

I sure did.

Cool, I get to call it an early night, gorge myself on a concerning amount of pie and pass out with Slutty Boyfriend Pillow by midnight. 👍👍

Important question, are the dildos also used?

Hero- FUCK YEAH WE'RE BACK. This OP makes me very concerned for this adorable child. HI YOUNG MIGHT. I don't entirely trust this guy. Hi Slutty Vault Boy! Aw shit is this recap I can't jack off to this. I stand corrected, Aizawa's looking pretty good. I love my kids. Mineta continues to be the worst. Man I bet Douche Rogue from the other class is so goddamn angry about this. In case you forgot who everyone was, here's your chance. Oh shit he knows it's Deku. Hey it's All Might. Awww people still fanboy him. Alright he's an All Might fanboy, we can trust him. Oh shit, small world. Cameras everywhere. Good ol' printer nipples. Damn, he did some real work on this. Selfie! That's a shitty title but at least you tried. Aww, look at my kids. All Might eating a meat bun, top story. THIS ED MAKES ME VERY CONCERNED FOR THIS ADORABLE CHILD. OPM- Whelp, Metal Bat is dead. METAL KNIGHT. Oh my god I kinda love the wrestling rhino and this gay chicken thing. Oh hey, Metal Bat's not dead yet. He may be about to die. Goddamn he's cool. Ain't nobody got time for that. This could be going better. Oh no his sister. Please don't kill him in front of his family. That's surprisingly nice of him. That blob looks gross. No you leave her alone. I goddamn love this gay chicken. Slaughter denied. No, kill the rich people. Meanwhile, you're all screwed. I like this geisha lady. Win that money, Saitama. I like the guy who's just named Dave. Genos is the best fan. This champion guy seems nice. This is gonna be fun. Saitama you're so lucky that everyone here is stupid. Like a butcher butches, indeed. Grandpa's so cool. ORA ORA ORA ORA. Oh dang. Martial Gorilla. Wow, this is all going straight to hell. I want her and Midnight to be friends. Wait since when do pandas actually want to fuck? HELLOOOOO CATFIGHT. Meanwhile, everyone boos Kaminari. Alright Saitama try not to turn anyone into a bloodsplosion. Oh no, that's so depressing. Dr Stone- Science is indeed super weird. I love the spear boys. Ginro will now die for you. Your enemy is SCIENCE. I love this idiot child. Y'all should probably not touch that water. Oh my god you idiot you're going to die. TOKOYAMI NO. Jesus christ. Aaron Dismuke talks about alchemy, I smile and clap like a trained seal. Whelp, you're screwed. This entire series is like a bizarre sequence of side quests and I love it. Senku I don't think we have time for that much science. Awwww you're friends now. I hope Taiju and Yuzu just gave up on Karsland and are just banging out in the woods somewhere. Oh no this is depressing. Awwww Kohaku. And then he was violently murdered. He's sad about his spear. Chrome's about to have a panic attack. Senku, giving no shits. Grandpa knows what's up. OH NO. Oh thank god. That is one angry fairy. Remember your hamon training! I am absolutely no different from nature I am dumb as a fucking brick. YEET. I'm proud of my boys. Fire Force- Oh god what now. Goddammit evil albino Deku. Tonight's theme is SCIENCE. I liked the old OP better. Oh, you're creepy. "Should I know him" is a question I ask with every goddamn character. At least they know their Roman mythology. Oh no don't send the idiots. Okay I like him. Oh shit he's buff and hates them, I can get behind this. Kid what's with the bandage, did you also get a beer can to the skull? Gee I wonder why he hates them. Hellooo there Lisa. I enjoy him and his aim with beer. Go fuck yourself, plague mask man. We're not like other companies, we're a cool group. Was...was he molesting that pissing squirrel doll? DEE DEE NO GET OUT OF THE LABORATORY. Oh cool it's a hologram machine. I don't think you can bring dead species back to life like that. Bring your hot girlfriend when you inevitably join. Surely plague mask man's unknown appearance won't play into anything suspicious at all. Oh what the hell now. Food Wars- I hate you all. I could be playing that KFC dating sim right now if I wanted a combo of fanservice and chicken. Thick thighs save lives. I'll admit that "Meat Master" is a title I aspire to reach. It's just chicken you weirdos. That looks like a salad in an ice cream cone and that hurts me physically. How long is y'alls damn school break that you can spend weeks on this project? I continue to hate you all. Is somebody about to beat his ass? It turns out tonight's theme is actually alchemy. Demon Slayer- I'm so proud of my son. Oh this is depressing. Awwwww Tanjiro. Look at all those dead ghost kids. Oh right, there's still a bunch of demons all over the place. My poor baby just wants to help his sister. Kid's earned a break for awhile. Morning, creepy twins. Alright everybody lined up to get numbers carved into your hand. REVELRY IN THE DARK. That's definitely not a crow. That kid just wants his sword already. Oh this is probably a bad idea, kid. Break his arm, son. Smell out the best ore. Aww, crow gets a little scarf. Just let my boy take a nap. You're home. SHE'S AWAKE! AWWWWWWWWW. Group hug! Aaand I'm crying. That's good if she doesn't have to eat people. Hey, free sword! Neat. Aww look at burrito Nezuko. That mask is freaky. It's like a mood ring. Oh, that is mayben ot a good thing. Sorry, maybe you'll get a cool red sword next time. Hey Tokoyami. He talks! I got a bad feeling about this. Clover- Hey there Captain Sexy. Kick his ass, Yami. Of course Yami doesn't get to fight, because I'm not allowed to have nice things. Maybe he can be the next Wizard Hokage. I do like watching this woman hate things and hurt people. ORA ORA ORA ORA. At least if you die you don't have to be in Black Clover anymore. Oh right, Asta's still here. Yes please set him on fire. Shut the fuck up and let her kill him. Oh yeah let's all just hold hands and sing songs together, that'll work out just great. This is why you don't knock up humans. You suck, wizard king. Flashback to racism. I can also be persuaded to do things with free food. There he goes, the luckiest character in this entire cursed series. Somebody stab him in the dick while he's doing this weird glowing shit. This is a trick and you're about to be sacrificed to whatever wacky plan he's got going on. WOW WHAT A SHOCK. Oh what the fuck now. Jojo- Bruno's so cool. I'm loving the random Italian bits they're throwing into the dialogue. Sorry Giorno you gotta take off your fancy ladybug pins. Uh what. Holy FUCK he's fat. He's fifteen don't let him drink. I like that there's just a random teddy bear in his contraband hole with the guns and grenade. Uh hey buddy that's your fingers. Giorno no that's stealing. Gaaaah don't show me that ear thing again. That's a cool lighter, thanks. Quick, turn it into a firefly or something! Giorno honey burning the shit out of your hand is probably not the best plan. I'm surprised they let him kep that flower. You know who wasn't fat as hell and also had flames as part of his stand? Giorno what the hell with the bread holder. Oh hey Koichi. Gee maybe you shouldn't have stolen his stuff in the first place. Snake lamp. And then his passport was on fire. GODDAMMIT OLD MAN. Whelp that's it, show's over. Yeah sure this'll work out well for you. Uh hey there, creepy wandering stand. Oh that old man is fucked. OH SHIT IT'S THE ARROW. This ED is so out of place. Lupin- I don't watch TED talks but I'm assuming this is how they go with the awkward comedy. This is just googling him. HI FUJIKO. This is why I don't go on Facebook anymore. Aw shit that's just gonna make crime harder for them. Draaaaamaaaa. NOT AGAIN. Whelp, time to move to Amish country. Jigen's too old for this shit. This is gonna get annoying. Goddammit get out of our house. Oh hey, it's those guys. Just call Ami and have her hack it. Goemon x Training OTP. Oh hey Ami. Random Hitler. Awww, she's happy. Not even your old gay couple disguises are safe anymore! Oh, time for an angry mob I guess. Oh hey, that guy. I hope they bonded over both of them shooting Lupin in the gut. Meanwhile, Goemon in the woods. Aww, she's cute! This is a trap. Henchman, that's just rude. Hey there Zeni. FUJIKO NO. FUJITITS YES. Tits out is a great start to an escape plan, let's see where this goes.

Yes. Slutty Pillow Boyfriend and I are very comfortable here.

We've been waiting for this.

I mean, Hero Academia is back so it's definitely the horny option.

Nobody talks about the fact that Mineta is exactly the right height to have gotten slapped in the face with a swinging dick during that fight but that would actually be some perfect karma for him.

OPM- "I AM HERE." Somebody should have thrown this child off a bridge. Oh no don't kill King. Okay you can go ahead and kill these guys. Awww his sister. Just let the monsters eat him. Saitama with that hair is goddamn wrong. Oh no, he kinda is that stupid. I love Mumen Rider. WOLFMAN. Well, you're screwed. Thank god he's stupid too. Wow what a shock it's the douche. Goddammit Deku, again. Oh he's attractive and I'm kinda disappointed in myself. Poor Saitama is too strong. Now beat these rich fuckers with your bat. Me thinks we mayhaps might have chanced the centipede. Okay that one is just a damn Pokemon. Mumen Rider is best hero. I love that dog guy. Go home, child. Somebody might wanna step in and help Bat Man. Damn he's cool. That was awesome. Just leave the rich folks for dead. Thanks...Pineapple Man? TOO MUCH CENTIPEDE. I still vote you let the monsters kill the rich. Good luck with that. There he goes. Not now, gotta fight a bug. Hello new guy. Dr Stone- FUCK YEAH, GLASS. Leave my melon girl alone. Awwww she's adorable....oh. Me too kid, I can't see for shit. Make her some glasses! Awww I love my melon child. I miss Screaming Boy. Senku x science is my OTP. Melon eyes! AWWWWWWWWW MY BABY CAN SEE. Meanwhile, Kohaku destroys them all. Make everyone some glasses. You're nerds, it is surprising you look cool. Yes, now you can exploit your child labor even more! Honey don't get your face too close to that. Senku's glass suit is unreasonably funny to me. Ya blew it. And then he kidnapped an old man. Kinkshamed by grandpa. Aww tiny Kohaku. Good plan, infuriate him with your failure until he helps. This is how I feel whenever my sister helps with Thanksgiving. Grandpa for MVP. Now can you make her some goddamn medicine? Every time I see tiny Senku it warms my heart. MECHA SENKU. I love these idiots. Senku has never been this horny in his life. FINALLY. Just let this boy have a fancy spear. To be fair, that will make them cool. He's right, he's my favorite. ADVENTURE! Oh christ is he gonna use him as a guinea pig for drugs? Fire Force- Quit being a little bitch and grow a set. Oh hey, he can actually do something. Okay I'll admit "BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTHER" is absolutely a great plan. Welcome to Fight Club. Well at least he looks cool. Oh come on how did Maki drop from one punch, she's built like a tank. Goddamn PTSD ruining everything. Legs aren't supposed to have their own rib cages. I also get violently angry over candy. Okay this is actually a pretty cool fight. I'm amazed that guy hasn't died yet but I don't think he's making it through the week. Kick the arrow out of the sky. Yes show, we remember that she just said that. Try shooting him in the dick. Oh, that works too. Somebody might wanna catch him. Now kiss. Alright now I just feel cheated that this guy hasn't died yet. I hate these children. I too get weirdly friendly when I drink. Food Wars- I miss hot dad. "I feel like your food raped me" is not a compliment. Where'd he get all these ingredients, you've been closed for years. Everything closed when your hot dad left. Unpopular opinion, fried chicken sucks. The hell are you talking about, depression is the perfect time to gourge yourself. I can agree on that, customers are dicks. Because what this show needed was a second Megumi. And then tits. Quit dressing like a hooker you're like sixteen. "Resident meat expert" is a fantastic title, I have no complaints. "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, LOOK AT HER TITS." The harem bullshit continues to not be funny. I want them to fail just out of spite. What, you're too ashamed to publicly gobble some cock? Calm down it's just chicken. Always remember to slap your meat. What's unique to the area, plague rats? I genuinely don't know if we're supposed to recognize this shadowy glasses guy or not. Put drugs in it, kids love drugs. Oh god I don't care. Demon Slayer- I'm proud of you. Thanks, creepy mask guy! Good you were due for a haircut. So try not to feed your sister anything stronger than some squirrels. Aw sweet he gets his own mask. A G-G-G-G-GHOST?! That one kid looks angry. Those twins are creeping me out. Oh dang, good luck kiddo. Aw crap you're surrounded. Remember your hamon training! He did it and I'm so proud of him. Aim for the neck like a titan. Oh, did that other kid shit himself. That ain't right. Poor ghost kids. Well that's horrifying. You did it! AW SHIT, RUN. Ohhhh that's not a good thing. You'd think he could just stop carving goddamn fox masks. Well, that could have gone better. I'm sorry, ghost kids. You can do it! Look at my son, slaying demons like a champ! Black Clover- Dio wants his time powers back. No, your boss being a goddamn idiot is responsible for the breakdown in communication. Kid you're like twelve what are you doing barking out orders. Yami actually giving a shit for once in his life. This is going way too well for time man, he's about to get stabbed in a surprise attack. Bad idea, just kill him. That's not even a book, that doesn't count. If your plan involves taking a sledge hammer to the natural laws of the universe maybe you should rethink things. Oh what the hell is this. Turn the brightness down it's hurting my eyes. Am...am I lucky enough to watch everyone die here? At least if you die, you don't have to be in Black Clover any more. Tonight's theme is "Kill the Rich" and I'm kinda here for it. Oh hey it's Hisoka's dad. Show I lost interest in this backstory after two minutes. Yoshikage Kira intensifies. Are you feeling a sudden fetish for hands? WOW WHAT A SHOCK THAT WAS TOTALLY UNEXPECTED. Fuck 'im up, Yami. Jojo- DAMN THIS OP SLAPS. Dio was a slut, we get it. Fuck you lady I'm his mom now. This is terrible I'm adopting this child. Poor baby. Tiny Giorno is a good boy. Thanks, friendly gangster! This mobster is the best dad he's ever had. Oh no gangster dad. Drugs are bad, kids. Meanwhile, Bruno getting to first base with an unwilling freshman. Turn the chairs into angry cats or something! Giorno honey zip your face back up. That did not go as planned. The hell just happened. MY FACE. He's definitely got the posing down. Stand fights must look super fucked up to normal people. Bruno's stand looks cool. Yes Bruno stop exposing yourself to the teenager. Bye! He's just wearing somebody like a leather jacket here. MY TOOTH. Oh, his power is like Josuke's. And then Giorno died. Not sure if he's wearing a fancy bra or has a fancy tattoo. MY ARM. Did you just yeet your own arm at him. Giorno's a good kid. Reminder, drugs are bad. We're gonna take down the mafia. This ED is fucking beautiful. Lupin- Who steals the damn door handle? WHAT. Cool statue. Well, that could have gone better. You broke Lupin. Watch out for your hang glider. I'm real confused with what's going on here. Is this just someone wearing a Zeni mask under their main mask? Thanks Goemon. You'd think he'd have more retirement savings after all these years chasing them around. No not my cool statue! And then the boys put the hurt on them. Did you finally break Pops? WHAT. Alright you gotta help fix him. No he's not okay you hit him with a damn car. He's surprisingly good at this. Awww Lupin cares. Those handcuffs are either a clue or a fetish. That is one fancy coat. There's two jewels you can just share. Oh my god. It's all good, we're back to normal. Hero- OH BOY IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN.

OH BOY IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN.

Hi quick question what in the absolute fuck is your signature. Also throwing in my hat into the "can it with the weekly individual pinned episode threads for every show" camp.

You mean Christmas Day 1

Calling somebody a jackass is just a liiiiittle different from screaming death threats at anybody who doesn't like your favorite show. The resident pessimistic douchebag doing what he always does ain't exactly an event that's rustling my jimmies.

I sleep with an Ace body pillow and you're surprised I stan One Piece?