EmpressAngel

God this better mean an Arthur/Excalibur teamup.

This is also how I react to seeing Fatgum merch.

Anxiety Boy is an absolute goddamn mood.

Oh my god my heart

I'm just going to preemptively state that whatever happens is not my fault.

It's that time again!

It gave me nightmares!

Next week we get the return of a character who's both the best Sasuke and by far the prettier Tamaki on the block. Titan- Fuck you, Zeke. Hey so what the fuck was that. It's real easy to agree when everybody is holding guns on you. SYMBOLISM, YA GET IT? I mean, it sounds like he was absolutely right for not trusting you. Zeke sucks and is the worst, lady. Meanwhile, everyone is having a bad day. Maybe he's just a massive douchebag. Someone punch this lady. Aw man they even threw the cute cooking guy in jail. You shut your fucking mouth about Sasha. I love the cooking guy and his immediate reaction to always kill someone for Sasha's honor. Gabi, still terrible. Oh hey Packmule. Well Zeke just survived a damn missile at point blank range, can shooting Eren even kill him? I like Packmule. Your life is a lie, Gabi. Sorry Armin they're gonna take your balls. Go ahead and turn into a titan, kill the little brat for all I care. Falco is a good boy. Yes this is all your fault and you should feel bad. I'm rooting for Packmule in all this. OHHHHHHHHHHHH. Aw fuck here we go. LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLEEEEEEE. Food Wars- Maybe I'll luck out and they'll just kill each other. I could not give less of a shit about any of these people. I don't mean to brag but I can make some pretty good instant ramen in a microwave so who's the real super chef here. Big deal I'm also an expert at gauging heat which is why I own that unreasonably expensive Endeavor figure. This is a sad, pathetic attempt at a fire user and I do not approve. Sugarfree salmon ice cream sounds goddamn horiffic. Meanwhile, Erina being unlikable. At least he wears clothes when he's sneaking through the ceiling, I guess. Okay that sounds pretty good. Laser fish. Here have some fish oil. I find imitation fire boy personally offensive and I'm glad he lost. You had me at bacon powder. Promised Neverland- Exposition dump, go. Well that seems weirdly easy. Oh, I just noticed that Emma's ear is still bandaged. Sweet, free birds. This is going far too well. I could go for some pancakes. Time for a fun hunting trip with all the small children. Have some fish. Okay the fish is walking. Good luck, kiddo. And then the kids died. Oh hey, Mom's still alive. Goddammit Don you're gonna get them all killed. You can just leave Phil. Whelp, everything's gone to hell. Are they human, or are they dancer? You have to save the veggies! That kid's eyes are way too close together and it's distracting. Pocket sand chair! Time to pull a Home Alone, children. Well that's terrifying. Well now you've just pissed it off. I forgot she has a bomb in her heart. Surely this will end well. So what was the point of that secret room with all the freaky writing? Fire Force- Hey there Captain Sexy. Hibana, still awful. Look at her titties, dammit! Kick his ass, Konro. Well, that was quick. I'm not entirely convinced that we're not in the hellish alternate world right now. Never trust an evil fire demon doppleganger. My doppleganger and I would get distracted by porn and never manage to kill each other. Oh hey Beni. You're gonna have to explain it to Arthur about seven times. Oh this is gonna be fucking painful. Yes yes you're goddamn terrible and should be ashamed of yourself. On the bright side, the annoying little girls are unlikely to set off her fanservice shit. Okay I love the kids shittalking her. And then he killed them. Show I literally don't guve a fraction of a fuck about Tamaki's backstory. Oh it's that douchebag. Remember that time she got the shit beat out of her but we were supposed to enjoy her clothes getting wrecked? Slutshaming is not cool, kids. Everybody wants to be a cat. So what the fuck is even the explanation for the lecture lure existing? I really wish this series could decide if the unwilling fanservice is supposed to be a funny, sexy thing for the audience to enjoy or an actual problem that negatively affects her and should be taken seriously.

There's a hot dude with fire powers and I know my track record with those. It's really in everyone's best interest if I just wait and watch it at home.

Ratings. If it gets higher ratings that anything else would in that timeslot, there's literally no reason not to keep it there. This ain't a hard question to answer.

Just get out before the holidays. God abandons the retail worker on Black Friday. Titan- Fuck you, Zeke. Remember, racism is bad. This is not gonna end well for any of you. Nothing to worry about, just a regular old dance club. It's hard to believe their dad got multiple women to sleep with him. He won them over through sick baseball skills. Oh wait no, he sucks. This is some Endeavor parenting. I'd feel bad for this little bastard if I didn't know what he grows up into. Ya gotta squeal on your folks to save your own ass, kiddo. Shit he was actually kinda cute for a bit there. "The founding titan can fuck with our DNA" sounds like a real bad time. Sterilize everyone sure is a plan alright. Jesus his poor son. You, uh, probably shouldn't trust Eren with that. So his glasses really are just for the aesthetic, like a fucking tool. Well this is depressing. Hug it out, bros. Here, take my old baseball. I'm still waiting to watch Levi murder him. WHELP. Joke's on him, Levi is too angry to die. Food Wars- I'm rooting for the bros and no one else. So did the redhead chick vote to install Erina's shitty dad? Does nobody care that this whole shitshow is partially her fault? Knockers Babe is a good nickname. Everyone else is still totally fucked but who cares. Oh, they'll be fine as long as they have a world-class chef in their club who can beat one of the top 10. Put on clothes you disgusting fuck. Erina, still goddamn terrible. I hate everyone. Soma is absolutely about to get into another food war. What kind of monster tires to kill the chocolate club. I'm constantly surprised that the nerd douche is a student and not a 40-year old man. I'm trying real hard to give a shit about any of this but it's a struggle. What a surprise, Soma tries to start another food war. Oh, it's Alice and Discount Sasuke. I hate Alice and Discount Sasuke but I think I hate the central kids more. Promised Neverland- I still don't trust Phil. I miss Norman. The nice demons are absolutely going to die, aren't they. This is a monster boyfriend who would treat you right. Surely that amulet won't come into play for anything later. Uhhh dude you okay there? Goddammit monster dude, I trusted you! Demon fight, go! Whelp, you're fucked. Sweet, free bunker. This is a nice bunker. Thanks, weird old dude we've never seen before. This place is nicer than my house. Play Freebird! A secret room inside the secret bunker. A secret passage inside the secret room inside the secret bunker. That is a nice bathtub. Things are going way too well, something has to go wrong. Y'all can just not go back for Phil. And now shit goes wrong. Oh that's ominous. Sorry, wrong number. Fire Force- BEAT HIS ASS, BOYS. Man that guy creeps me right the fuck out. To be fair, half the time I long for death with every fiber of my being. I keep forgetting Sho exists. Uhh did they give that boy a lobotomy? Leave that poor kid alone. Oh it's gonna be fun seeing him wreck this creepy bug weirdo. I love this dumbass. Aw shit we fucked up. Fuck you guy, I hate the sun. Oh right, shit's about to blow up. I don't know enough about explosions so I'm just gonna assume Science Dandy is correct on this. Use Maki's brother as a meat shield. This would be a great job for my girlfriend Maki. LET MY WIFE FIGHT. Date me, Captain Sexy. MY WIFE! Punch your brother in the face. Plese don't kill Captain Sexy. Use the other captain's skill as a battering ram. Maki continues to have absolutely zero competition for best girl. Eat shit, zombie lady. God I love my wife. Arthur's ultimate power is just not thinking. BEES. So are y'all fucking or what. Oh hey, Juggernaut's still alive. He's got a potato's will to live. Maki is best waifu.

Sometimes I wonder what the Binging with Babish guy thinks about Food Wars when he's not obligated to shill it for videos. Titan- Don't save Gabi let that other girl stab her. Fuck you, Eren. He's the woooorst. I don't really understand this Ackerman special family power thing but okay. Oh FUCK you, Eren. Beat his ass! Mikasa needs a hug. Fuck it just let him get himself killed. Use Gabi as a human shield. Levi is the best. I'd also hate to deal with Zeke completely sober. I got a bad feeling about this. Oh you piece of shit. Ohhh that's not good. Levi vs 30 titans almost seems like a fair fight. Oh my god this dumb bastard really thinks Levi won't still kill them. Levi's gonna need a hug after this. IT'S LEVI TIME MOTHERFUCKER. Yeah sure, turn into the thing that he's the best at killing, that'll help you. Fuck you, Sasquatch. Nah you should probably kill him now. Oh hey Seitz guy. Shut up, redshirt. I continue to hate this guy. Everyone sucks. And then he died. Levi doesn't fuck around. I hope he broke those glasses just as a bonus "fuck you" to him. Food Wars- The only ones I give even a fraction of a shit about losing their home are the food bros. Oh no, the kids have a water house whatever will they do. This chef is supposed to be threatening but he sounds like the stereotypical math nerd that would get shoved in a locker. Blah blah blah he's super talented whatever, I'm gonna bully this dork for his lunch money. I hate that this show always makes me hungry. I still have no idea why I'm supposed to give a shit about this girl at all. I think what I hate most about this show is that Soma is literally never phased by anything and is always a smarmy overconfident bastard. Okay, you had me at cheese. You like Krabby Patties don't you, Squidward? I hope Erina's shitty dad gave the school janitors a raise for dealing with all the jizz. Erina still being an ungrateful bitch. Obligatory COCK joke. That's some real big talk considering all someone would have to do is take a hammer to your cookin' hand. Promised Neverland- Did you eat my friends, little demon girl? Thanks, armed demon guy. It's cool, they're vegans. I like these two, this won't end well. I accept whatever weird demon god you worship as my personal savior. Wait what. Kids I think your book was wrong. "And some weird, weird humans tried to fuck us." Aw hell we're just on the wrong side of the planet. They're taking this awfully well. This is going way too well. Seriously, just leave Phil behind. Monsters aren't my fetish but, I mean, this guy is real Husband Material for anyone up that alley. Okay I enjoy everyone dragging Ray. I love these kids. This is going waaay too well. Oh, it's really pretty in daylight. Fun time hunting trip with Uncle Demon. That plant is cool. Oh shit I didn't even notice the plant back then. I miss Norman. Oh no, they were terrified and definitely suffered. At least the flower's pretty. Fire Force- Juggernaut is a good boy. Oh no he's not wearing enough layers. If only someone strong like Maki were here to carry him. This is not my fault. Holy shit is Tamaki actually going to do something useful for once? Shut up dude your sister was great. Oh no, you have to fight a badly-themed wrestler. Oh hey Shinra. Ah, it's this asshole. Never trust a man with a plague mask. LET MY WIFE FIGHT GODDAMMIT. Oh that ain't normal. I dare you to read the disgusting horrors of my mind, asshole. Yeah, I can believe that bugs came straight from hell. I love my idiot son. Shit, GUN doesn't work. Okay I kinda hate her brother now. Aim for his dick! I kinda love this villain. Oh my god fuck off your sister's a grown goddamn adult. At this point I almost want her brother to die. RIP best villain. Meanwhile, Tamaki being worst girl. Aw hell it's the Klan. And nothing of value was lost. HEAD. Hiii Vulcan. God I love Captain Sexy. PUNCH. That guy's headbutt attack is cracking me up. Yes yes, you're goddamn terrible and you should feel bad. To be fair, he does look stupid when he runs. Oh shit y'all better run.

I found it, the Most Cursed Furby. Edit: I like that Twitter refuses to actually show that thing so I have to share it myself.

Are people still watching it? Does it pull in ratings on par or better than what comes later? Genuine question, I don't ever look at those.

One year my sister got a Furby for Christmas and I swear to god that thing reeked of battery acid from the moment we took it out of the box. I don't remember how she eventually got rid of it but I'm sure one day she'll just find it sitting on her couch with no explanation and they'll have to torch the entire building.

Titan- Aw shit what is this. Oh fuck you, Zeke. I can't wait to see Levi kill him. Levi is the best. Sasha's family is so nice. Cook guy is nice and I'm glad he cares about Sasha's family. I miss Sasha. Oh hey, it's the main characters. Booze! Casual racism ahoy. The hell kind of excuse is that, he needs help shitting his pants? Gabi, still the fucking worst. Kill them, cook guy. Falco is a good kid but damn does he make bad choices. Yes I know she's a child soldier who's been raised to be hella racist but I still hate her. We all loved Sasha. You keep her name out of your fucking mouth before someone knocks your teeth out. Everyone needs a hug. You're a good dude, Sasha's dad. Don't worry I hate you enough for everyone. FUCK HER UP, GIRL. Aw shit the wine is poison. Oh FUCK you, Zeke. Falco just can't catch a break. Don't feel bad about yourself, I absolutely would have murdered that child too. I always forget this ginger fucker exists and I hate him. Goddammit Eren this is all your fault. Food Wars- Man this guy just makes my skin crawl. Wow what a surprise, this guy's a douche. I do enjoy the cooking bros. No way, you're suggesting a food war that's totally unexpected. I have no idea who any of these people are and I truly do not give a shit. Oh no, the poor little rich girl will lose her hiding place while everyone else just flat out loses their home. Whelp, sucks for y'all. I'm constantly surprised every time Erina isn't acting like a total bitch. Yeah sure, let's flash back to the festival that was literally a week ago. Cry harder I have zero emotional connection with any of you. Call your hot dad for help. I still want him to lose and suffer. So why did y'all vote to make the douche the boss anyway? Yeah sure evict them all, who give a fuck. Promised Neverland- I've heard enough about this season to know I'm going to be disappointed. Oh shit that's a big monster. I think our compass is broken. Ray you're supposed to be smart, don't make people scream and draw attention. Hey check out this weird pen I'm sure it won't be important. Huh, that's different. "TOUCH ME" is a weird message to leavea bunch of children. I miss Norman. Those sure are some suspicious sea anemones literally nowhere near a sea. I still don't trust Phil and you should just leave him. Hi there, monsters. Oh that ain't good. Nah man I don't think that's perfectly safe. Goddammit Emma! Well that girl sure looks ominous. Man these demons kinda suck at their jobs. Is Emma still dying here? This little girl is a friendly demon isn't she. It's fine, she's a nice demon who won't eat your face. Fire Force- I love Arthur he's so goddamn stupid. Oh hey it's Maki's brother. Remember, use Tamaki as a human shield. Juggernaut is a good boy. Tamaki, still worst girl. And then everyone blew up. Zombies, you say. Oh fuck it was this guy's last mission before getting married, he's screwed. OH FUCK, it was this guy's last mission before having a new baby, he's screwed. "My life flashed before my eyes and it was pathetic, so I'll be fine." He immediately died. This is actually hilarious. What even is his body. This entire squad is ridiculous. Whelp, that's no way to get ahead in life. Titties. Go ahead and kill Tamaki, it's fine. Once again, look at Tamaki's tits while she goes through a near death experience! Oh hey Shinra. Oh hey, not Shinra. Oh dang she's pretty. Juggernaut is a good boy. Good thing he has all those layers. Clover- Is the filler over yet?

I promise to try even harder to kill Endeavor this season.

The government wouldn't let me have a tax refund if they knew what I'd spend it on.

No. I guarantee you that David Productions did not tip off Toonami in advance, months before they announced the anime, so that they could put together a subtitled miniseries that had absolutely fuckall to do with Jojo. There's a huge difference between "We're planning a special one-night only program, can we air these specific episodes in Japanese?" and "We're going to air this 40+ episode series in Japanese and then, several months later, air the entire thing in English again."

They're not gonna pay to air the same show in two different languages.

Titan- I always forget she's locked in a giant crystal. He wasn't gonna molest the titan crystal, he swears! I'm blaming Eren for this. Okay lady what's your deal here. She's just here to watch some carnage, I guess. I like this guy, it's gonna suck when he inevitably dies. Aw shit she's playing all of them isn't she. Obligatory fuck you, Zeke. Whelp, that could have gone better. And then shit blew up. Goddammit Eren. Oh all of you randos are absolutely going to die immediately. Where's Levi? Might wanna check that Levi hasn't killed Zeke yet. I trust this old guy. Surely all of this will go well. Mikasa knows what's up. God I love Hange. Oh hey, Sasha's family. Oh shit it's pack mule. Food Wars- Hot dad! Damn you kids are dumb and this is gonna bite you in the ass. Put on pants you weirdo. I don't trust Creepy Dad Dandy. Ohhh this is gonna get all weird and incesty isn't it. Get the hell out of my room you weird old man. So then, she was always an unlikable bitch. I'd still probably pick that out of the trash can like a feral raccoon. Oh, so he's the one who made her a complete bitch. Yeah this escape attempt will go well. Yes, run away. Shut up, worst Sasuke. I agree, Erina sucks. Send her to hot dad. Oh hey, is Megumi actually going to be useful for a change? She's literally on the school campus, how hidden can she be? Look at the sad abused girl's tits, look at them! I do enjoy the bros. Erina, still fucking terrible. Fire Force- Maki is my girlfriend. I'd like to marry your daughter, sir. God please just date me. Huh, she has a brother? Her mom is also pretty. Awww, he's a good dad. Oh no he's gonna kill GUN dude. I love her so much. I love this entire family. Oh right, that's where they went last season. Hi, Captain Sexy. Her brother's definitely about to die isn't he. Well that's different. Aw fuck it's the fire bug. Aw shit it's a bomb. RIP brother, you were cute. This is not my fault. Oh, he's alive. Donkey dick. I hate you, Lisa. Hiii Captain Sexy. Tell your dad to fuck off. Fuck you too, gun man. Date me, Captain Sexy. Arthur you poor dumb idiot. This is horseshit let my buff wife do her job. Everyone loves Maki. Oh I hate this other girl. Let my buff wife do her job! Hi there, ugly ceiling guy. Oh yeah this is gonna go just great. Clover- No. Gridman- Akane's gonna need a hug after this. I love how her mom just goes with it. Uh Rikka might be dead now. Anti turned out to be a good kid after all. Shut up, fancy alien. "Fabricated meat thing" is how I'd describe myself most days. They'll help her with the power of friendship and also these mechas. Get in the robot, Shinji. Anti's helping! Shut up and just thank him for helping you. RIP albino, you tried your best. Oh that ain't good. Oooh, sweet new armbands. LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO. Aw hell he can't die. Dude just play a dating sim or something. My idea city would have way more naked dudes. Whelp, Gridman's dead. Oh this is new. This is the power of friendship and violence. Aww, she finally accepts them as her friends. Eat shit, Alex. This is spiral power, bitch! I'm not entirely sure what just happened but damn am I here for it. Can we have lesbians now? Aww, she got her girlfriend a present. Somebody better fuck god before this is over. Nobody got to fuck god. Bye, Gridman. It's fine, the evil immortal alien is stuck in this hamster cage. Bye, Sword Dandy and Pals. Wait is our albino hobo still alive? Oh hey, the little hobo girl is here too. Wait what? Was this all just a game of Sims?

The fact that GXP is rated so high is causing me real, physical pain.