mthor

Shut up. I have a child your age.

No, it's FB, short for Fierce Bad, and if she was a pooka, she could buy her own drinks. As it stands, she's just an ill -tempered rabbit, and I'm trying to placate her.

Dude, I'll be 62 in 4 months. How do you think I feel?

Why do children, without fail, have to get up in the middle of supper to go take a crap?

Two glasses of dandelion wine, please. One for me and one for the rabbit.

Eat some yogurt if they gave you an antibiotic for that sinus infection - your intestinal flora may be out of whack.

🍻🎂🎉

A Karen dude. You know how I get when people bring up Karens.

I was always fond of the whole Becky thing; every Becky I've ever known was incredibly unpleasant. All the Karen I've ever met were very pleasant and polite; even the guy who coughed TB in my face apologized after he did it. Granted, as patients, they were on the whole frustrating to deal with due to the language barrier and cultural issues with western medicine and compliance, but damn, they were always so nice about it.

That looks more like a lipoma.

You have to actually go to the doctor for the cure to be complete - or at least, that's how it worked when the kids were little. They'd be on death's doorstep until I made an appointment, then they'd start improving. By the time we were sitting in the exam room, they'd be perfectly healthy.

What, no pie chart?

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@tsar4 If it makes you feel any better - Percy Faith and his orchestra, Johnny Mathis, the Mantovani orchestra, the Living Strings...Basically, the kind of music that makes you slow down and look at cows and stone fences when you're driving. Also, Harry Belafonte - my mother loved calypso.

Oh, god, no, you had to say it and now I hear it too, and I haven't watched One Piece since like 2005.

I need an orgasm. And God help you if you make it with milk.

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I suggested that whoever won the challenge would get a vote deducted, but I can't work out the details - had a problem come up with the kids. I'm out for now

I assumed so, too. I'm just having a hard time figuring out which submission is most horrifying.

Judas Priest on a pony, you hit the trifecta! Jello, mayonnaise, and condensed soup!

As an inspiration:

The final snackrifice for this round has arrived, and the monster wants something special to go with it - a salad. Not just any salad, but a salad so vile and disgusting that it will thrill the monster to the bottom of its cold evil heart and challenge Soma, its special dinner guest, who has expressed an interest in monstrous cuisine. (Jello and/or mayonnaise will probably be involved.) Go forth, and bring not just a picture, but a recipe in case the monster wants to make it again. A YouTube video, a TikTok (can we do that?), one of those vintage ads, or even a screenshot of Packard's cooking blog - anything so that we can appreciate just why your particular salad will tickle the Monster's palate.

Becky. Please

Not anymore (mwahahaha)