Doom Metal Alchemist

Fair enough.

You knew what this was. (literally)

You better believe I looked for one of a black woman on purpose. 😂

Cut out middle man and just use chocolate milk.

I'm actually pretty curious myself. I can't imagine you pissing someone here off that much. Unless it was me when I facetiously go FUCK YOU or something or someone else doing the same.

You don't actually EAT balloons, do you? And by "eat" I am not referring to the same way one would "eat" pussy.

Chick Not-Fil-A.

I don't know enough about the fantasy genre to be able to agree or disagree. To me elves are just the ones that make Santa's toys.

I never had to deal with that. We used to have (maybe we still do, but I somehow doubt it) two landlines, my dad used one to take business calls from his home office. That's the one he wanted me to use for the Internet, not our "main" line. It actually wasn't often that I wanted to use the Internet but he was busy in his office. Most of his working time was at appointments elsewhere (or driving to and from said appointments).

Con: They don't get candy. Pro: Snow day! School's canceled! EDIT: Don't mind me. I just realized 7 inches PROBABLY isn't enough to get school canceled. Don't mind me, I'm a lifelong Californian. I don't know shit about snow days.

She's trying to get YOU to cum come you fuckin' fool!

Fucking millennials. *is a millennial*

Got mine already. The flu shot soreness does linger for a while, but by far the most painful needle I've gotten was to draw blood for getting blood work done. The nurse or whatever laughed at me for writhing and groaning in so much pain. Allergy shots on the other hand are cake. Anyone with serious allergies they can't seem to shake I highly recommend getting allergy shots. Can't imagine what Athena's been through with friggin spinal taps.

At first I misread "woodshop" as "woodship" and had quite the image in my head.

Yes, the legal diving ages for men and women should be raised to 19 1/2 and 21 respectively. And fathers should be required by law to drive their sons and daughters wherever they want or need to go whenever they want or need to go until they are of legal driving age. Have fun with that, dude who wrote that. As for "which one of you fucks was it", I didn't see it myself as I guess I was late to the party, but bucket once had quite the reputation as a He-Man Woman-Hater.

You know what's "fun" in San Francisco? When there's a stop sign at the top of a hill, so when you take your foot off the break to transition to the gas pedal when it's your turn to cross the intersection, your car starts rolling backwards down the hill for a couple seconds. Is there some strategy to this I don't know about?

A vengeful, wrathful God.

Happy birthday! Open the spoiler to reveal a hooha cake, just for you!

You know what I haven't seen yet? You posting, "kill me kill me kill me kill me kill me".

.....I would definitely quit that job.

Is that a Freddy Krueger sweater? Also I hope after you won and took off the mask you were more talkative and jovial to show everyone you're not really creepy. 😂

These choices are terrible. No turkey, no roast beef...

They should just cancel it. Robert was my favorite character from the show. RIP

Stolen from The Far Side:

Are you stealing MilkLover's King of the Hill quote thread schtick?