Doom Metal Alchemist

'Member when the ASMB filter changed "bored" to "boring" so there were countless "I'm boring" threads in IB?

"Ok babe, I love you, but if we're to get married, first I need you to sign this prenuptial agreement. In the event of a divorce, you get everything. *evil smile and handwringing*"

Caunnibal Corpse. Or would Cattle Decapitation be a little too on the nose?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not envious of that at all and I was not wishing I had that problem. It just literally sounds like Bizarro-world friendzone. Especially that bit where she's crying to you that she just needs a friend.... That's like the friendzoned dude being the chick's shoulder to cry on.... but you get sex with her..... but you don't want it.... but you somehow feel trapped / obligated into it.... and the only way to escape is to avoid her. I just figured with most guys, it wasn't hard to cut women who weren't their s/o's off from sex when you really don't want it from them.

@Rogue_Alphonse have you met Midnight and disco yet?

Should've named it Allister Squirrelly. (however you spell that first name)

I like where this is going...

How the fuck old is this meme? I thought I was a 90s kid, but maybe I'm actually an 80s kid? Yeesh.

Duane Kuiper, never a pitcher mind you, had one HR in his entire 11 year MLB career. And he wasn't a bad hitter either. His career average was a very respectable .271.

I hope you're not too offended when they do.

I don't know, a panda in love?

I was gonna suggest ice cream, but you got it before I could. Kudos.

Myself. This has two meanings.

Who are you?

I think I used to have a link to my band's music in mine until the band imploded. For all I know it could still be there because I forgot to edit it out because I forgot it was there.

How the hell should I know?

Damn, I've been so accustomed to seeing that mistake I completely missed it. But on the other hand, it annoys me when people point it out and say what they meant was "have" (which is what literally everyone who points out this mistake does). No, they did not mean "have," they meant "'ve".

THAT'S the lyric you have trouble with? Not "I wanna hey, I wanna hey, I wanna hey, I [whatever goes here] a zig-a-zig ah!"?

Does work still make you come in if you're sick?

Sgt Tort Attorney & Wife

Wouldn't corona era sports be e-gaming?

like omg If I got to see Klaus Meine backstage after a Scorpions concert at their Vegas residency I would just DIE.

Me tooooooooooooo

You butchered it.

Even I disagree with this.