NSAID

The obvious answer

You tell someone not to touch something, they break it. You give someone a simple task, they rip something off the wall in an incomprehensible accident. Your boss suggests delegating more, I wonder.

I do not want this

For better or worse, I would not be the man standing before you today without Now 4.

Another '06 jam

They were the only CD store in the mall and damn near the only option in town when I was growing up, I just assumed they weren't around any more bc... Why would they be (or maybe I'm getting it mixed up in my head with the Waldenbooks that was next to it. I wish I was able to save more of the shitty/still awesome CDs/Manga I bought at those stores so for hard evidence/pure enjoyment of my former shitty/still awesome taste).

One time it was really cold in my familial home so I tried to curl up my legs into a pillowcase like some sort of fictional orphan. Maybe try that (it didn't work terribly well).

When I feel like I've grown up enough to start making plans for a future further ahead than a week in advance, I have to remember that I live on a dying planet and I don't know which is wiser - arguing with nature or just doing what seems easy til it don't matter no more. I get mad all the most over the top media I consumed was right.

Now, your daddy don't mind And your mommy don't mind If we have another dance

Dumb af but it killed me like ten fuckin years ago when I first saw this. “This is a concept album. The concept is that I tell a bitch to go buy me a hot dog, and she does. While she is buying me a hot dog, I wait patiently, and do The Robot. I eat the hot dog and it is delicious.”

Do what everyone else does (Wait for them to leave for work, then immediately start slamming shots and blasting all the hottest Depeche mode tracks)

Crab chips, but I can only eat like five at a time

I feel like there's several things wrong with it as a concept, but if you've found white gravy w/o chipped beef on toast than I can't help you, that's just fucked up

I "like" creme chipped beef, but not enough to eat it as an adult or as any kinda choice

Sometimes, in the middle of an otherwise random dream, I dream that I can't unclench my jaw, and my teeth are getting caught on each other in my mouth and every time I try to adjust my jaw to relieve the pressure they just grind against each other at force and my mouth fills up with a slurry of saliva and tooth chips

Mostly. I've seen the large square ones inside stores while people are stocking, but while I feel like most employees wouldn't even want to bother dealing with it if someone tried to leave with one, I'd rather not force them to have to come up with a figure for how much they actually care about plastic bins, that'd just be cruel. Haven't seen any recently, but they used to drop the rectangle guys with the orders of bottled drinks for the restaurants in the area I was working at. We would stack them outside the back doors and we'd all move them back and forth to use as chairs during smoke breaks. And then sometimes people would throw a few of the cleanest ones in their car.

I love theft and menacing big business, but prefer to take plastic crates (large square ones or stackable rectangular ones) bc you can use them as impromptu chairs OR tables OR as storage.