Codename: Jackass

I know you're really more a Pentagram, Candlemass, Black Sabbath guy but New Millennium Cyanide Christ is one of their best songs, and the video is kind of funny. If my memory is correct, they were all extremely drunk and riding to the next gig on their tour bus when that was recorded.

not really Meshuggah's first album was pretty much Metallica worship except a bit more technical New Millennium Cyanide Christ, which was from their third album, really differentiated them from the thrash-influenced bands of their time. You can hear the thrash influence but they turned everything up to eleven. Because eleven is louder than ten.

YEAH I'D LIKE TO SQUIRT IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE

I LOOK FORWARD TO THE FUTURE BUT AGONIZE OVER THE PAST HOW DO I STOP?

ONE OF THE ONLY COMPARISONS IS IRON MAN

I KNOW BUT IT'S ONE OF THE MOST METAL METALS TO EXIST. THEY BOW TO BLACK SABBATH, METALLICA AND NONE ELSE. IT'S A SONG ABOUT BECOMING A METAL MAN, LITERALLY

I'M A CARNAL ORGANIC ANAGRAM HUMAN FLESH INSTEAD OF WRITTEN LETTERS I REARRANGE MY PATHETIC TISSUE IN INCISE, I REPLACE, I'M REFORMED I ERADICATE THE PRE-PRESENT ME ELEVATE ME TO A HIGHER HUMAN FORM THE CHARACTERS I AM MADE INTO A WORD COMPLETE THEN I'LL BE THE NEW NORM

METAL IS THE PATH TO ENLIGHTENMENT, MY FRIEND. CAST AWAY YOUR WEAK FLESH AND BECOME ONE WITH THE STEEL.

I'm going to sit in my house and get depressed over opportunities I've missed and friendships I've lost.

I'm quite drunk. Not trying to sound like that "cool" 11th grader but that's what I'm doing right now.

I get sick after that sweet spot of eight or nine hours as well, but at the time I didn't care.

I drank some Hot Damn! earlier.

Is it on your neck? Just put a piece of gauze on it and say you cut yourself shaving.

I've seen Iron Man, Incredible Hulk, Thor, Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy and Civil War. Eventually they all start to run together. I mean, they're entertaining, but I don't feel the need to feed the Disney beast any more than I already have. I may watch Infinity War in a few months if I ask my friend to put it on while we're drinking.

Someone probably did something really stupid and got it deleted.

This one time a friend of my brought us some Fruity Pebbles. That's what he called it, I'm not sure if that's what the strain was called, but that's what the guy who got it from the guy who got it from another guy called it. By God it smelled and tasted like fuckin' Fruity Pebbles. One of the best highs I've had, and I'm a paranoid person so weed tends to make me do things I don't like. But that was very enjoyable. BTW I recommend Cherry Bomb if you should happen upon it. It's very pleasant.

That was on my day off btw

Last time I worked 24 hours in two days I just turned my phone off and slept for about twelve hours.

I have this problem where if I wear a white shirt I tend to get stains on it every single time, usually from food. If I wear any other color, it happens a significantly smaller amount of time. Why does this occur?

I'm drinking Squirt and cheap rum. Squirt is grapefruit flavored, think Fresca with real sugar, and the harshness of the cheap rum helps make it taste more like a real grapefruit. I'm also chain-vaping a concotion of watermelon, mint and citrus. That should bve enough to get you nerds going at 3:00 AM (Central Daylight Time, of course).

Starbucks is open this late?

only real nerds like the same move twenty times over.

There's this dinky little "lake" (it's a pond) on the campus of my old university and the smoking porch of the performing arts center overlooks it. Myself and the other students would sit out there and throw bits of sandwich or potato chips in the water for the ducks or fish.

DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY

Excellent bone structure.