ITasteLikeSex Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Many years ago I read that if you stay a virgin until you’re 30 you get wizard powers. Also you have to stay a virgin to keep the powers. Once you do some sex then you can’t have wizard powers. For over 10 years I made sure I would never know the pleasures of flesh. No harlot or witch would take away my chance to have wizard powers. I stayed fat and greasy and anti social to secure my virginity. My mom always asked when I was going to give her grand kids and I said “Never! Begone foul hag! My wizard powers gestate deep within me!” Then she asked if I wanted hot pockets for dinner and of course I did. And please bring me a diet Mountain Dew. But no children! No sex! I had a world ready to be conquered once I received my wizard powers reward. My 30th birthday came and went. I gleefully awaited my wizard powers. But after I woke on that fateful birthday, there was nothing. No powers. No came or wand or hat or wizard beard. Just my neck beard and eyes full of tears. i wasted my youth on search of power that would never come to me. Now I’m fat, ugly, and alone. No one will ever love me and I’ll never have wizard powers. 1
bnmjy Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Is this copypasta? Otherwise, what an ironic SN to have . . .
ITasteLikeSex Posted October 27, 2019 Author Posted October 27, 2019 5 minutes ago, bnmjy said: Is this copypasta? Otherwise, what an ironic SN to have . . . Only fresh pasta from me 1
Raptorpat Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Maybe when fuggs calls people virgins she is actually calling them wizards. 2 3
NapalmDeath Machine Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 7 minutes ago, Admin_Raptorpat said: Maybe when fuggs calls people virgins she is actually calling them wizards. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
Sir Teddybar Gut Fullung Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 That sucks, dude. I'm so sorry about that. I wish you the best of luck.
🍬Candy🍬 Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Thats just something a forever loser made up so they wouldn't kill themselves 1 2
🍬Candy🍬 Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 57 minutes ago, Admin_Raptorpat said: Maybe when fuggs calls people virgins she is actually calling them wizards. Nope. Definitely calling them repulsive losers 1 1
Lasty Posted October 28, 2019 Posted October 28, 2019 Be glad you’re powerless. Basically nothing is ever your fault. You get to be the guy who blames the wizard for the collateral damage inflicted when he saved all of you!
ITasteLikeSex Posted October 28, 2019 Author Posted October 28, 2019 10 hours ago, Seight said: WHY ARE YOU ME? I'M ME HOW AM I YOU
Sir Teddybar Gut Fullung Posted November 1, 2019 Posted November 1, 2019 26 minutes ago, ITasteLikeSex said: This was a good thread Are you sure about that? 1
scoobdog Posted November 1, 2019 Posted November 1, 2019 11 hours ago, ITasteLikeSex said: This was a good thread OP was decent. Would have liked to know where you read about it. 6.9/10 Expecting great things kid, 1
ITasteLikeSex Posted January 21, 2020 Author Posted January 21, 2020 On 10/31/2019 at 11:49 PM, ITasteLikeSex said: This was a good thread
PhilosipherStoned Posted January 21, 2020 Posted January 21, 2020 (edited) 6 5 out of 10. Wait Dammit Scoob. I refuse to agree with you. Edited January 21, 2020 by PhilosipherStoned
Lasty Posted January 21, 2020 Posted January 21, 2020 (edited) On 10/26/2019 at 9:52 PM, ITasteLikeSex said: Many years ago I read that if you stay a virgin until you’re 30 you get wizard powers. Also you have to stay a virgin to keep the powers. Once you do some sex then you can’t have wizard powers. For over 10 years I made sure I would never know the pleasures of flesh. No harlot or witch would take away my chance to have wizard powers. I stayed fat and greasy and anti social to secure my virginity. My mom always asked when I was going to give her grand kids and I said “Never! Begone foul hag! My wizard powers gestate deep within me!” Then she asked if I wanted hot pockets for dinner and of course I did. And please bring me a diet Mountain Dew. But no children! No sex! I had a world ready to be conquered once I received my wizard powers reward. My 30th birthday came and went. I gleefully awaited my wizard powers. But after I woke on that fateful birthday, there was nothing. No powers. No came or wand or hat or wizard beard. Just my neck beard and eyes full of tears. i wasted my youth on search of power that would never come to me. Now I’m fat, ugly, and alone. No one will ever love me and I’ll never have wizard powers. The idea is to accumulate enough of a specific variety of energy that has to place to go. No other place to go. Universes with cost & effect expectation fields make it difficult to cast even a simple cantrip or have verifiable knowledge of "magic" at all. Edited January 21, 2020 by Lasty
Sir Teddybar Gut Fullung Posted January 22, 2020 Posted January 22, 2020 6 hours ago, Lasty said: The idea is to accumulate enough of a specific variety of energy that has to place to go. No other place to go. Universes with cost & effect expectation fields make it difficult to cast even a simple cantrip or have verifiable knowledge of "magic" at all. I hope you go to sleep while listening to this. (Also, check out the video at around 3:45. You'll get a kick out of it.) 1
scoobdog Posted January 22, 2020 Posted January 22, 2020 3 hours ago, Sir Teddybar Gut Fullung said: I hope you go to sleep while listening to this. (Also, check out the video at around 3:45. You'll get a kick out of it.) Fuck you, man. 1
Sir Teddybar Gut Fullung Posted January 22, 2020 Posted January 22, 2020 6 hours ago, scoobdog said: Fuck you, man. You're into the lead singer and her abs. Admit it. XD 1
scoobdog Posted January 22, 2020 Posted January 22, 2020 42 minutes ago, Sir Teddybar Gut Fullung said: You're into the lead singer and her abs. Admit it. XD She's just hot enough to make up for those suspect moshing skills. 1
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