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UnevenEdge

Daily board confession


ELDEMONIO

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After 25+ yrs, I have yet to return that Garfield book I got from the library. Everytime I walk in there, I assume the security guy will look at me and tackle me down and beat me and ask why I haven't returned the book yet. I know they have a record of it somewhere in their archives. And if they find out, I may owe them millions at this point. Sorry I lost the book.:(

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One time my mother was served (she said a cop told her she had a warrant out over this, but I feel like he would have just arrested her then? Idk I was a kid) over less than fifty dollars in library fines. It's a very serious matter.

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These corn chips we're dyed green, like super green, and I was told they would turn my poo really green. I believed the person and did it anyways, what else was I going to do? Keep my poo brown? Anyways, the toilet won't flush.

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Another confession.

I once stole a box of crayons when I was like 6 and as me and mom mom where leaving, the manager came towards us near the exit. Except instead of stopping me, he stopped another kid with his mom. I don't know what happened after that but I would like to formally apologize for doing that. I was young and I wanted those crayons. I promise I never stole anything after that. Besides a slim jim at a walmart years later when I was like 25.

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2 minutes ago, ELDEMONIO said:

Another confession.

I once stole a box of crayons when I was like 6 and as me and mom mom where leaving, the manager came towards us near the exit. Except instead of stopping me, he stopped another kid with his mom. I don't know what happened after that but I would like to formally apologize for doing that. I was young and I wanted those crayons. I promise I never stole anything after that. Besides a slim jim at a walmart years later when I was like 25.

You monster

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I grew up in a small town in in a very Christian conservative state. I didn't know what being gay meant until I was 21 years old and my girlfriend at the time took me to a gay dance club. Then I figured it out, but before that I always thought it meant someone who didn't want to have sex or no one wanted to have sex with, like one of them a-sexuals basically. Like when kids would call each other gay slurs I thought they were saying they didn't want to fuck or wouldn't ever get to fuck, and that being constantly friend zoned made you gay. There was only one gay kid at my high school who I didn't know to well bc he was in a lower grade and some kids were like he's going to hell but I didn't believe that and didn't see the big deal, what do I care if he's not into girls? A lot of the girls seemed to like the idea of a gay friend they didn't have to worry about crushing on them and making it weird or whatever. For some reason I thought I had learned at some point that the Bible says it's a sin because you're supposed to be fruitful and multiply, and that people didn't want gays to marry for this reason. It all just seemed really stupid. Really don't understand why they don't teach that in schools, at least just like what it means. 

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