Skiles

Well, I have to differentiate between those and my pube clippers. They're two different sets. My life isn't THAT bad yet.

Yeah, I'm pretty much crushing it.

That's why I'm clinging to my current job for dear life. Don't even wanna deal with it. Sitting in a cubicle is boring as shit, but I'm chillin' right now.

Well, I'm using the cord to my face clippers as a belt right now.

204863.

PP restore, my dudes.

I mean, wouldn't it be simpler to just lotion up?

Woke take: As adults, we actually get to make fun of way more homeschooled kids now.

When I was a kid, I caught a case of violent hiccups. I'm talking full body spasm hiccups. By like the eighth one I was actually crying. It didn't last any longer than regular hiccups, thankfully, and it hasn't happened before or since. It was fucked up.

I was talking about rappers. But only rappers named Dylan.

DYLAN THEY GOT YOU PUSHING TOO MANY PENCILS

Candy, meaning sweet treats in general. Not ice creams or baked goods though. Mine are Snickers ice cream bars, Skittles, Butterfinger, and peanut M&M's. I'm a simple man, I like chocolate and peanuts. EDIT: My fifth is probably Boston baked beans. Don't judge.

Yeah, in hindsight the whole thing is a bit problematic. But I got it stuck in my head for some reason soooooo.

Bond-wise? Who even cares. Moore and Connery are gone. They were the only two Bonds that matter. Brosnan and Craig should fight to the death for third place.

I love to sing-a.

Mine have been the same for three decades. Which is to say, I never got one, despite wanting one.

Wait, then who the heck is Pemberton Buttlesticks?

Wait, I thought that was Flimdybum Spoodlydink?

I liked him in Sherlock.

They weren't. Some of their earlier stuff is dope.

Fine, I'll show you my pussy.

I mean, Adult Swim aired Shin-Chan, which (frequently) showed a child's penis. So whatever the line is, it's pretty arbitrary.

I refuse to acknowledge Maxwell or his house. He knows what he did.

Is Folgers in your butt.

You just gotta believe in yourself.