scoobdog

No, if you wanted a new one, you'ld be sitting pretty, fingering yourself to your schoolgirl smut, waiting for the big burly mattress delivery dudes to deliver your new mattress and remove the cum stained abomination from your hovel.

I said new. Not "like new."

You're trading one unskilled job for the next. You would be a failure even if you stayed as a janitor.

In other words, he wouldn't.

You didn't actually buy a new mattress, did you?

Literally every single mattress store will offer to dump your old mattress for a fee if you get the new one delivered.

What kind of shitty mattress did you buy?

In his case, definitely.

Where to start: In a cashless society, Packard will starve to death because he won't be able to buy mystery meat from his favorite corner market. In a cashless society, Packard will become a drug mule by selling his half assed kanji characters and erotic school girl drawings for millions to cover the illicit sale of kava root. In a cashless society, Packard doesn't know his pension fund was busted because he forgot the PIN number to his debit card. I could go on....

Dude. Half the country laughs at his stupid antics and the other half thinks he's an idiot.

You. You are the best argument for a cashless society.

Correction: you get your news from a failed comedian?

So why didn't you have the guys delivering the new mattress take the old mattress?

Besides you, of course.

A comedian? You get your news from a comedian?

You know... I can't wait until someone on AM radio tries to explain NFTs to Packard. He'll be telling us how NyanCat is a fucking cartel kingpin.

For the record, that building almost certainly has a steel support structure.

A targeted demo with a really suspect use of construction equipment.

You don't know what you're looking at, so yes I can.

It's fucking Mickey Mouse shit is what it is.

There's a fucking mini-ex on the roof. How the fuck did it get up there and....why?

Apparently enough to hasten your demise.

Then why are you eating six eggs?

Clearly he’s doing things wrong.

Not you.