Vamped

Thats a pretty productive poop. Thats how I know its a good one .... and also shark week is afoot

Better luck next time

Gonna lock myself in the supply closet and draw dicks on the back of the post it note pads

So .... specifically how did the school gas light you and leave you unprepared for real life?

Same. Doesn't matter how long the drive is, ill be awake the whole time

Really thinking about skipping it this year. I always work the day of and then really early the day after so I'm not really in the mood for all the sweater vest pettiness.

1st of all pumpkin is gross.

This is for people with normal families. My family holidays are brutal for the inexperienced. It'll start like .... oh you seem like a nice young man ... then they wait until you're good and comfortable on maybe your 4th fork full of mac & cheese and then they sense your weakness and go for your throat

Work parties are one thing I don't have to worry about. The last Xmas party they threw, it was at a casino and some people lost their fucking minds with the free alcohol and got shitfaced then tried to have sex in the middle of the casino floor. Some rooms got trashed .... it was ... not a good luck for corporate >.> We're never having an offsite Xmas party ever again.

As a human living in a climate controlled environment Fuck dem walruses

Rejection

Wanna get drunk and watch MHA?

So ... you wanna discuss how much you fucking suck over tempura. Im ordering alcohol

Im gonna play Striking Vipers and fuck that Korean guy from Tekken

Doesn't matter, Im Chuck Norris

Circle jerkin, got my wiener workin I legit tried to find the clip from robot chicken ....made a grave error in method of search

fucking fraud artist indeed

I'm never moving that fast trying to get out of bed so ... I don't think that could ever happen to me.

Perfection

eh .... Satan prolly does wear lots of disguises. There's probably a better chance of him being at church than being in disguise as a hospice patient