Mix

Imaginary love with this imaginary ONE person sounds like a rough time. I just play video games and jerk off.

Happy birthday what would a ninja's birthday even look like?

a different, somehow worse, perspective on the thing that apparently represents me when it rains it pours

I bit a guy's foot in a fight and was rewarded for it. A fairly famous fight that many are familiar with, but you would struggle to find a person who can identify me as being apart of it. This....information has depressed me more than I expected. Well played.

Threesome sounds better. It sounds like you're dry heaving every time you say throuple.

My apologies. I had no idea your goat was the wet nurse of the mighty Zeus himself. Your historical texts have converted me into a believer. Let's see what ancient magical creature represents me............................................a crab, i'm a crab, fml, even in this the universe fucks me

A mermaid goat? I haven't even heard of that in mythology. This zodiac stuff is so left it uses off-brand made up creatures.

Well, your mascot's a goat. How can you not be a hater when everyone else has lions and mermaids. Plus, i'm pretty certain pragmatic is a synonym for hater. Anyway, back to talking about celeb threesomes. The public is don'e with celeb couples. 2021 is the year celeb threesome take over. MARK MY WORDS!

Every game of monopoly I played growing up ended pretty much like this and we never hit the news.

When I googled Capricorn, it didn't say anything about y'all being haters

idk How do people remember things like that? Where were you?

But he would have taken the next one...and the one after that Kobe taught us not to let the misses get us down...to take our shots in life he dared to shoot when others would pass and by doing so he taught us not to pass on life

And I missed First time in twenty years. I curled up in the corner and cried for two hours. My co-workers didn't say a thing. They understood that it finally hit me. He's really gone.

No, that's 69 with the guy on top. This is a new and exciting way to enjoy mango juice ice cubes and your preferred choice of genitals at the SAME DAMN TIME

All I know is I read Horizontal Refreshment and immediately thought of 69ing with ice cubes in each persons mouth. #ClassyAF

No need to edit in the sunglasses and cigarette. This man is a living meme.

Lice come in cubes? Is it like a new type of lice?? I've never heard of anyone getting lice, let alone the new cubed species....how did you manage it???

I only recognized 6/18. I don't know who failed me worse, my friend group or porn.

well, they are bolted to the platform

you want to put your dick in a machine and then possibly 'cause it to malfunction?

It's sex

I'd go to one of those cross fit gyms. They're always getting injured...you show up with a van done up like an ambulance and take your pick... Nothing against the ladies at the stripclub...they just seem like a group of people who would be prepped and looking out for a possible abduction/brain swap....I'm not trying to get stabbed

Pretty much....though Bleach did manage to maintain a better through line in its transition.... Funny how I've spent years dismissing sitcoms for their formulaic structure and predictability while watching the same kind of anime over and over