Mix

I've seen far more tenuous lawsuits pay off could be worse.....could be trying to sue a Scientologist elementary school As stupid as it sounds, you can't say for certain that Scientologist elementary schools aren't a thing....yeah, this is real life

You gotta have more confidence in yourself. I'm sure one of those ten people will be happy to take you home......or they can bring it to you, that's the beauty of a mobile home....

Getting paid and getting laid

This is what I show people when they don't believe that I drive better drunk

It's truly amazing how little it took to make my life complete in those days....The first time I saw this guy I was happy for days off that....fucking days

that sounds amazing....I'm sure it happens but i've never even heard of something like this You went to your ex's family for the holidays, obviously for the kids, and you brought your new girl........i'm breaking out in a sweat just thinking about it

I don't think this mythical "normal" family holiday gathering exists.....everybody's ready, coping mechanisms engaged and bland sport and/or weather conversational topics ready.... Heck, if you go to some other families house, they don't even have the ammo to do any real damage....they don't know nothin'

Idk what you're talking about, that sounds like a successful party to me

Yes....it's tradition....the cake is chocolate on the outside AND the inside, reminding us of Africa We sing the songs of our tribes afterward

Happy birthday, champ.....

I'm not meant to have hair on my face, Molar....we're messing with forces we don't understand....like Pharrell or Prince before him, I am to retain an almost unnatural youthfull face for eternity or till I overdose on something.... I....I think...it's alive......it moves sometimes and yesterday Im sure I heard it growl ☹️

wot's dis den....wot yew on about ya daft cun

awww, you remembered

COME ON AND RAISE UP!!! TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF!!! TWIST 'ROUND YOUR HEAD!!! SPIN IT LIKE A HELICOPTER!!!

Y'know it never occurred to me that he had a speech impediment....I just thought he was a talking dog.....figured that's how that would go

omg, I said the title and made the reference, but when you repeated it, I totally blanked.....my mind isn't making any connections....the light is on, but now one's home....i'm going to bed

yeah, yeah....I remember....he's like "GOOOOOOO, GO NOW AND LEAVE ME!!! THIS IS SPARTA!!!" Gerard Butler is in everything. And if you're stoned enough at two in the morning you'll watch Phantom of the Opera thinking, "when do the Persians show up...wait is this the one where he saves the President......damn it, I can't find my lighter....where could I have put it....I had it a second ago....it was in....my hand, crap, it's in my hand, i've been holding it this whole time, I think I may be too high, if there is such a thing.....oh shit, is this 300....wait I think this may be the one where he saves the president.....where is my lighter...."

at the risk of looking stupid....again.....where does it say he's thirteen? Does the name mean thirteen? Why do you like that? For the humor or pedo? Sleep, how important is it? What was the first person who surfed thinking? Can Jolly Ranchers expire? Coke or Pepsi with actual cocaine in it? Encephalopathy....that's not question I just like saying it