Sawdamizer

I made a wish at 11:11am, this is what I wished for...... But now that I just told you it won't come true.

WTF... I can't fap to this... or I can... but this would be considered hard mode.... heh... hard.

You are getting that shit cut then.

I only have a bit of Jameson left....

Catch a subway man.... those people still roll around with their music blaring out of their speakers.... it's shit music. If I had the testicular fortitude is blast rage against the machine... but then I remember that my battery would be wasted. Anyways, where's my whiskey at....

Throw it in the fire.

We have to pay extra... $60 a month... so I don't. Oh well.

We have those here still, I can't eat them because my ass falls apart.

No idea. But, fuck them. The clickshit that pops up is crap and I hate it, they can make money on the other peasants.

He is looking for sympathy on... well, here.

Thank xenu you leech off your mom and live at home.

Wouldn't it be hilarious if it was really my dick photoshopped on to this picture? Hmmm?????

It was my go to response to a lot of Joel Osteens facebook posts... they caught on after about a month.

Thousands of reasons someone could have high blood pressure. I had it in my late 20s and I switched by diet up, I only buy greens and limited meats... nothing really prepacked anymore. Chicken is my choice of meats and typically kale or broccoli with whatever seasonings.... I use a lot of lemon. I'm lactose intolerant so that helps... I mean, I don't do cheese, ice cream and that junk.... Haven't been sick in a long time and my BP is 110/70 now. I still drink the vodka... but everyone needs a vice right? The cocaine and hookers just keep me right between the ears.

Poof was the first to make mention of it I think a month or two ago.... fancy that.

User error

She's using a meat thermometer.

Yes, watching bobs burgers.

Shorts. That's it... eff clothing.

235 +???? Jesus... you outweigh me by over 55lbs... and I'm 6'1"

So how much do you weigh now?

Take a lot more than recommended

Work Mexican, work.

Nope. We have lobstah rolls.

I want spicy Cajun foods too tho.