Skiles

You know when a clown blows up the balloon and ties it into a little animal shape? That's my dick. My dick is a balloon giraffe.

Sweet, dude!

I'd pay money to search for precious minerals within your foreskin.

That's great, dude! Happy for you.

You've been given proof on at least two occasions.

Hard, it's a shade over six inches.My girth is pretty average. Not pencil thin, but not cheese wheel thick, by any stretch. It's circumcised, and it curves upward when hard. I keep it, and my nutsack, very clean. I haven't shaved the downstairs in a while, but the bush isn't too bad. Alright, see ya later.

I like to think I have mediocre dick energy. Not particularly confident, but not a complete wimp. I'm just kinda here. Here, with my decent penis.

And just yell "NONE OF THIS IS REAL" and then run away.

I'm sorry.

Who are you playing for? The Tampa Bay Buccaneers? The New York Mets? The Denver Nuggets?

I'm actually out in the sun quite a bit. I play with my nephew in the backyard a lot, and the yard has very little shade.

I don't know what it is. I'm not really all that gassy during the day, maybe a little if I eat something weird. But every night, without fail, I lay down in bed and, the farts stop comin' and they don't stop comin'.

You don't know shit about me. I can't remember ever having dreams where I've died. But I've had very vivid dreams where I've killed someone, and spent most of the dream hiding from the police.

You wanna hear an interesting factoid that very few people know about Game of Thrones?

Nope. Just standard stuff for us growing up.

Why would you make a Game of Thrones thread? i don't watch Game of Thrones.

You can't handle my potions, traveller.

If a radiator falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Uhhhhh, something something drywall screws. I dunno.

Well, yeah. If I don't talk about it, it never happened.

I MEAN IT'S BASICALLY THE SAME THING

irl pic of me holding a screwdriver

Well, not really. I'm going to take off the front part and clean the blades off. But I need a screwdriver to do it, and using tools makes me feel like a big strong manly man.

GOD ISN'T EXIST

You're just now figuring that out? Some folks here are super creeps. People throw shit out here that I posted on Facebook YEARS ago. That makes me laugh because I'm just like, "Wow, you either REALLY like me a lot, or you REALLY have nothing going on in your real lives. And both options are very creepy and sad."

I would be willing to disable ad block on this site. And if the ad is interesting, I might even click it. Why not, right?