myth busters: boar3d edition

[[classic swim]]

He’ll scream at very quiet parts of a public opera so everyone else in the audience turns to him.

[Seight]

Was asked to leave the theater after yelling "CHICKEN JOCKEY!" during a screening of The Accountant 2

[[classic swim]]

Banned from Planet Hollywood Resort for attacking Jeff Dunham on stage and strangling the Jeff Dunham puppets.

[The_annoying_one]

Wrote a thrilling review of that show, criticizing Jeff Dunham for his juvenile humor and praising Seight for "saving comedy".

[[classic swim]]

Laughed exactly like this at the Jeff Dunham show.

[discolé monade]

was akzzually the one that told beyonce to bulldoz into the country music scene. 

[The_annoying_one]

Helped Beyonce and Jay Z name their first child.

[[classic swim]]

Hired SodaKandy to approach Beyoncé & Jay Z with an order of two Quarter Pounders and a Big Mac from McDonald’s.

[Mode 7]

Is set to star the in upcoming movie 

The Cotton Candy Creatures From Cleveland 

[The_annoying_one]

Is winning the WWE tag team titles at Wrestlemania 42 with Mr. Hoonie as his partner.

[[classic swim]]

Hired GunStar to hand Jeff Dunham a bag of 4 Quarter Pounders, a small cheeseburger and a sprite, and had GunStar watch Jeff feed the Jeff Dunham puppets.

[Seight]

Was confused about the small cheeseburger part of the order

[The_annoying_one]

Makes cheeseburgers the size of a dime.

[discolé monade]

as he tells it, once he reached the summit to find the lone tibetan monk, the wise old man looked at him and said

'who the hell are you? did you bring the newspaper at least?'

[Seight]

Explained to the monk why everyone calls him the "Wise Ass On The Hill"

[[classic swim]]

Once said “I think you got me confused with yo mama” and got punched in the face by Uncle Phil.

[little_girl_lost]

Only eats capn crunch's oops all berries for the green poops

[discolé monade]

loves the way her pee smells afteer an asparagus binge. 

[The_annoying_one]

Drinks mashed potato milkshakes.

[[classic swim]]

Fired Guster for refusing to watch Jeff Dunham feed the McDonald’s Quarter Pounders to Sweet Daddy Dee and Achmed The Dead Terrorist.

[Seight]

Eyewitness that had to explain to the police why Peanut wasn't involved in the incident

[discolé monade]

knows what peanut does behind closed door with mr. hoonie. 

[The_annoying_one]

Tried to pin it all on Carrot Top, the smug bastard.

[discolé monade]

gets paid by carrot top to compliment his new look. 

[[classic swim]]

Ran a contest between Mr. Hoonie and Jeff Dunham’s puppet Melvin The Superhero to see whose nose could penetrate an escort’s butt the fastest.

[Mode 7]

Is the reason why Mr Hoonie is wanted for parole violations 

[Seight]

Ran a potato smuggling ring, but is out of the game now

[Doom Metal Alchemist]

Bought those black market potatoes, mashed them up, and snorted them.

[discolé monade]

attempted to  cut a weed supply with black market potatoes. an actual success, since burning it made it smell like pototo chips. 

[Mode 7]

Is close friends with that raccoon that was caught with a meth pipe by police, she has persuaded the raccoon to go to rehab

Edited May 14 by Mode 7

[The_annoying_one]

Agreed to snitch on the raccoon in exchange for a lighter sentence.

[Mode 7]

Plead guilty for being an accessory 

[[classic swim]]

Located meth pipe raccoon’s 5’11 crack cocaine distributing cousin who manages a car wash and ran him over like this.

[Insipid]

Started blasting the Pointer Sisters when he heard their song in the newest GTA 6 trailer.

 

[[classic swim]]

Finally got in a verbal argument with Fuggs and said 

[Mode 7]

Got Fuggs banned from all Red Lobster locations

Edited May 14 by Mode 7

[[classic swim]]

Danced like this when someone said to his wife’s mom “no one wants to sniff ya bitch ass BLTs.”

[The_annoying_one]

Once called a 90 year old librarian a “shrimp-ass smelling bitch”.

[Mode 7]

As it was stated last month he learned how to play trumpet from watching Harmony Smurf, TAO has decided to put his "trumpet skills" to use by blaring his instrument outside of classic swim's window every night after getting tired of classic swim crowing outside his window every morning in his chicken suit.

Edited May 15 by Mode 7

[Seight]

Court reported who transcribed the resulting lawsuit

[Mode 7]

Was the real life inspiration for Clumsy Smurf

[The_annoying_one]

Has dreams of becoming an ambulance chaser.

[Mode 7]

Is currently selling Ambulance Chaser For Dummies for his door to door booksaleman job

[mthor]

Isn't sure what he's going to do with an ambulance once he actually catches one.

[Insipid]

Tried to make Packard a lolcow on Kiwi Farms

[The_annoying_one]

Has an entire photo album full of pictures of random people’s mailboxes.

[Mode 7]

Has a photo album full of pictures of random people's reactions to Hubb's threads

[Seight]

Runs a business that licenses random graphs to online users

[Mode 7]

Won the rights to Macho Warrior Ric Hogan name. Plans on returning to the indie wrestling circuit.

[The_annoying_one]

Is responsible for every popular catchphrase from the last 15 years.