Skiles

I might be misinterpreting this, but did you accidentally create a rumor that you jerked it at work?

C'mon, you really think anyone is gonna find this and sue? Out with it.

The odds are good on that bet. Then again, of all the Jackass guys you would pick to die first, you probably would have put your money on Steve-O. So I guess you just never know.

Answering my question with "You guys know my story" is just about the weirdest way to answer the question. I have more questions than answers now.

That picture looks like Harrison Ford is slowly fading into the blue nothingness of death. Is he next?

Wait, you don't just eat the marijuana leaves? Boy, drugs sure are confusing.

I think we all agree there.

Your tone makes me not believe you.

I mean, I feel like the location kinda goes without saying. Unless...?

Night owls. I have had some 5am fap sessions.

Just curious. I could never do it, personally. Not enough privacy.

I could name all the presidents in order before I was in Kindergarten.

THAT'S the reason you wouldn't? Not a more practical reason like, "We're related ew gross," the reason you gave is essentially, "It wouldn't work out between us."

Again, pet names are fine. And during sex, it isn't calling them the wrong name that's the issue. It's calling them by their name in the heat of the moment.

I mean, if you're able to consciously dictate what you call the person while having sex, then more power to you. I don't have that ability. I'm not thinking ahead here. It's all I can manage to not say the name of whatever ex I may or may not be thinking about in the moment.

Because it's weird? Like honestly, during sex, do you want to accidentally be like, "Aw, fuck yeah, Terrance" and then think to yourself, "Fuck, my little brother's name is Terrance"? I think at that point I would realize that I could never fuck that person again.

Ja feel. I think you underestimate the majestic woodchuck, but hey, what do I know?

Hawt.

Ayy, I'm buzzed too. Mid-relapse life. My question is this. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck... and hear me out... if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Not me. I have an apartment to (hopefully) save up for. So I gotta keep it tight.

That's it, I'm suing the English language.

I was going to answer, but then you cursed at me, and now I don't wanna. Harumph to you, sir.

My job is to wait for old people to call me. Then I read to them while I click stuff on my computer. Then I sit at my desk and watch TV while waiting for the next call. Side note, Designated Survivor is a pretty good show.

For the purposes of this thought experiment, let's say they're just really pretty in a "girl next door" kind of way. If it's a dude, "boy next door" vibe.

This is what happens when they insist on the Lions and Cowboys playing every Thanksgiving.