He is. You may see the insecurities you share with him, but he definitely lacks the mental fortitude to deal with them head on like you have.
I would not say you were being too nice, but I would say that he was playing on your vulnerabilities. You knew all along to keep him at a distance, but that didn't change the fact he was offering you companionship when you desperately needed it.. That 's the worst part of all this - you had every right to expect companionship without being used in return, and you did all the right things leading up to this. And you still got shit on.