Vamped

Thats when adulthood hits you hard .... lemme ask for something I need .... y'know I could use some fancy towels for my bathroom ... y'know the kind you hang up but you better not dry your hands on

you have to give them a minute to get there ... they're old

dispatches toothless grannies to give you a good time in your pants .... they go .... all the way down

well I mean ... as long as you dont go out there strangling random dogs on the side of the road to make your hat then ... I can't judge you

me too ... maybe I can sneak into a store and buy myself some make up but then be too busy to wear it

Going to eat at my grandparents house .... and wait for some Grade A family drama to unfold

I just got called in to work Saturday. But FedEx sucks the joy out of Xmas for everybody .... hopefully I'll be in a better job next year. Im tired of getting cursed out several times a day because these grandmas dont know where their kids live .... or where they live .... or they address fucking packages that require signatures to infants

The ones with registered sex offenders

well if you take the question the way I took .... definitely

I dunno .... if I trust Richard Simmons to make desserts

a butt

well you can't have it both ways. You gotta have one or the other. I'd take the carolers and do something low down like install a sprinkler system ....or let a dog poop in the lawn

Could be worse .... you could be hearing gunshots instead of carolers ...

If you still can't get any help for your mental health ... then I suggest you find a nice wholesome weed man ... erm ... drug dealer ... but nothing crazy like meth or bath salts

what has you so anxious?

Lol try working for 8 years at Fedex

If you haven't seen Ru Paul's Drag Race ... you are missing out

We almost never have a white christmas but this weekend's weather is fucking crazy. It might snow when the temperature changes because they expect storms all Saturday

Its going to be 70 degrees tomorrow then 33 degrees Sunday

monthly

I mean ... just be upfront and be like ... dont catch feelings ... this is just sex

I appreciate this information. Learn something new everyday

Liiiike .... aren't you supposed to use lube or lotion ... or something?! But hey I dunno ....

I save my taxes for vacations